ADHD, a tired but grateful mom and a beautiful boy.

[maluvzla]

Being an introverted person sometimes is not easy enough, specially when you have a full time loud job and three boys; but when one of your children is diagnosed with ADHD is harder then ever but you never give up. My dear child is 11 years old and he was diagnosed with ADHD a little over a year ago. Sometimes confused at school with defiance, arrogance and bad behavior teachers can not get passed his actions to look deeper at the person he truly is within. My dear Sean has a gentle soul, a heart full of compassion and love, he is a special child but is hard for others to see past his behavior. He can not control his impulses at times but his gentle heart comes down after a few minutes and his anger turns into a loving smile and a warm hug and his chubby rosy cheeks blush then my heart melts. I gave him medication for a little bit and then decided to stop as I did not want to push all those chemicals in his developing body. He did well for a while then again we began to struggle in school and temper began to show more often for a little bit there, so we recently seemed to see the doctor about it again and he began some medication, but my heart feels sad that he has to take this as he is taking an anti depressant I believe is called Zoloft or something like that. The doctor explained that it was to also control some of his OCD symptoms, he tends to turn the door knob 14 times after he closes a door. The thought of him taking a medicine like this is difficult as he is only 11. Sean has been doing great for the last few days but I can not tell if it is because of medication or from changes we had made around the house and our schedule to help. I have moved some things around so that I can spend more time in the mornings with him as he expressed he craved more time with me. I have been buying healthier food and we have been trying to distract his attention when we feel he may be getting a bit mad. Also a stricter bed and wake up schedule has been put in place. Over all I am telling my story to see if there is any other mother out there that is going through this, as an introverted person in general I tend to want to re charge away from everyone for a while because my full time cubicle noisy work place is very exhausting, coming home to a house full of noise, which don't get me wrong I love because I adore listening to my children laugh but coming to this can be sometimes exhausting as well. Then also having a child with ADHD literally leaves you with no room to re charge and sometimes getting an alone time is close to impossible. Much love to everyone who has a child with this condition, we as parents need a lot of patience but we love our children so much that we can not give up on them, they are the future, they are brilliant and loving and unique and with much love and persistance we can get a control of this condition. I am grateful for my beautiful boy every day since I held him for the first time, I am grateful for the good days and I am grateful for the not so good ones, because I have him, his smile and his love and together we can get through anything.

In the photo: Sean and I in our Disney World Vacation. Fall break 2017.

[Davidsdad]

Seems like you are on the right track with life . Although it’s tiring and we may feel overwhelmed at times it’s worth it . I myself am adhd and was diagnosed at an early age back in the 70s . I guess my mom chose not to address the situation at all . So it was never addressed in our household that I was adhd . I was not aware of it myself as a child so I got in my fair share of trouble and feel short in school . I had somewhat of a normal life but always felt different and in my eyes at times have underachieved . My son was born and he came out like the golden child healthy. He was walking at 9-10 months and then he was speech delayed and then he was no longer perfect so the world lead me to believe based on their standards . He is going to be 9 years old and about a year and a half ago he went thru testing to see what his diagnoses was . I’m not gonna use the terminology. What is wrong with him because he is a child of god and there is nothing wrong with what god makes . God knows what he is doing . So again we found out again that my son was not perfect according to the worlds standards . My wife a school teacher made sure that he read and did his studying before school when he is more responsive to doing his work and after school he does his homework . Routine works most of the time . He was in an A Special Ed class and last year was taken out and put in general Ed which seem to be a blessing . But last year he started getting in trouble for not being able to control his behaviors. So we started him on a low dose of medicine. It helped . It was less than the doctor recommended but like some parents we we’re afraid we would hurt him . When he was diagnosed with adhd I decided to start addressing my adhd . While I was in the doctors office I inquired about the medication about my son and what are the benefits. My main thing that I asked was about school . My doctors told me the bigger picture on how it would help him would be socially . He told me that was the most important part of the equation he was right . We just upped his medication to the suggested dose that the doctor gave us . I see a major difference with and he seem much more confident.Having adhd myself I can understand what my son goes thru . I recently picked up a book called Delivered from Distraction . I wanted to understand more about adhd . The book is on point and insightful . One on the things that is written in the book is that he ADHd mind is beautiful and once you can understand how it works is the beginning of something special . Thru all my struggles with adhd I was able to become somewhat successful. Despite not being what society wanted to be like every other child . The reason I am pointing this out is the truth is your son is lucky that he has a mom that cares . Although you are tired and overwhelmed. You and your son will be ok . Another thing that I learned is when our children are impulsive which may get them in trouble . They don’t exactly mean or know what they are doing . I regards to my son the medicine helped and finding more about the functions of the adhd Brain helped me understand the situation and gave me the ability to better understand how to interact better with him and be less frustrated. Better days are to come for you !

[maluvzla in reply to Davidsdad]

Thank you so much, this brought tears to my eyes and was very helpful, specially on a difficult day like today. I appreciate your words, God Bless.

[Nita73 in reply to Davidsdad]

Hello can u tell me the medicine your kids is on? Thank u

[Boymom3]

I am introverted as well. I have an extroverted husband and 3 young boys, all diagnosed with ADHD. I get up really early in the morning to have some quiet alone time. I think God gave me this family to pull me out of my “introvertedness” somewhat, but I definitely need that alone time to recharge. I love your positive attitude toward your kids. They will pick up on that, too.

[maluvzla in reply to Boymom3]

wow, I can not begin to imagine how difficult it must be, God bless and I do not feel alone anymore. Our love for our children keeps us strong.