pill popping or not

[Loucas12]

So I am here on a Saturday after taking an antihistamine to dull everything and wondering where I go next. I was given some antidepressants by a Dr I feel just to get rid of me! My husband is being great, I don’t really manage without him but I seem to be stuck - I don’t want to take the antidepressants but I don’t want to feel this way anymore for him and for me. The only time I am rational is after having a sedative antihistamine and that lasts for around a day. What a mess.

[CamperT25]

Hi , ypu are not alone in this at all. I take Escitalopram, just 5mg, it takes a few weeks to work but then takes all the worry away, well it does for me. I had an ear operation to fit a grommet, ended up with terrible issues in that ear for a year, never thought I would cope, but Escitalopram worked great. 2 months later I could manage things calmly and was happy again. Grommet fell out, hearing g back to nor, still get T sometimes, when I do I use Sterimar Congestion nose spray, to clear nose, then Vicks Soother straight after. This helps ease the noise, my T is caused by eustacian tube dysfunction., so Congestion spray works well. Good luck, hope you find things easier to manage, Hxx

[Loucas12 in reply to CamperT25]

I think mine could be the same as I have blocked nose on left side most of the time. I find I am spaced out a lot of days as if I am not really here. My husband is beside himself with worry as he feels helpless. I suppose we both need to get to the GP to get some advice - I probably do need the meds. Thanks for sharing.

[CamperT25 in reply to Loucas12]

No problem at all. The Sterimar Congestion helps clear the nostrils, and sinuses, then the Vicks Soother helps unblock things. Once the pressure has gone the T stops, or definitely eases to a manageable level. Hxx

[Jimbob7]

Pill popping? I was a walking drug cocktail bar when this T first happned to me. Sertraline, Diazepam, Phenergan, Beconnaise, Codeine, and a load of others - They even shot some morphine in to me a couple of times - all played their part to get me through the nightmare of severe / catastrophic Tinnitus mugging me from behind following a running accident that damaged my C5, C6 and causing cervical disfunction. This we now know from the medical merry-go-round I've been on since then - scans, CT, MRI, MRA, etc, Audiology, Neurology, ENT, - finally we got the answers but I didn't know any of that when it first happened. I honestly thought my life as I knew it was over - finished - kaput.

All I knew at the beginning was the racket in my ears was going to drive me mad. If someone handed me a pill - I'd take it - all I wanted to do was crawl away from the noise. Night time was worse - you, the T, alone. I longed for the blessed relief of the sleepers, the benzos - taking me away from that racket.

That was my whole life for the first couple of months.

Then I started engaging with the program - all roads pointed to a need to "habituate" - had never heard the word before but people here and elsewhere said it was the best shot at getting the other side of the T, getting 'one-up' on it, moving forward - away from it being the centre of my attention.

I started with the A, B and C's ; Meditataion, relaxation, breathing, background sounds, music, live-streams, the right kind of exercise, yoga and suchlike. Making deals with the T then refusing to do so. Rationalising it, then abstracting it. Seeing it as part of me, then as not part of me. Owning it then dis-owning it, trying to make the relationship work every which way but the right way.

I researched Tinnitus like it was my phD thesis - one I really wanted to pass. In meetings with ENT Consultants I'd throw stuff at them they'd have to admit they hadn't taken a look at - or in one case, a Consultant - with no trace of sardonism - told me that I appeared to know that particular aspect of Tinnitus better than he did. That was a short meeting.

Slowly the medical merry-go-round slowed it's pace as we all collectively exhausted theories, mulled over scan results, batted ideas back and forth and the like. The consensus? - "The T is there, probably to stay, you'll get used to it." What they'd gently been saying from the start only I'd refused to accept that. Now of course I do, one day at a time.

Because all that time I kept working on habituation - a subject I had to research myself, ask so many questions, seek out people who seemed habituated to their T - make contact, get them to spill; What works for them, what doesn't? then apply to me by doing likewise and then working out what bits worked for me and what did not - try everything once - keep the good stuff - chuck away the rest. Slowly and purposefully - build your armoury of devices, tips, tricks, methods that work for you.

There is no one silver bullet - your salvation comes through having a load of little things you do, work on and build on - new "habits" (get it?) - things that individually might have little use but put them altogether and you have a veritable war machine with which to quietly rage and defeat the Tinnitus and take its power away from it.

And it works if you work it - so work it - you're worth it.

In the mean time - in early days - yep, keep taking the pills - I did - but at the same time bring your focus over to habituation. Loads on the Tinnitus Uk website, loads out there - bring it in.

Whether your T journey be long or blessedly short the habituation you get started now will stand you in good stead going forward either way.

Love, peace and silence.

Jimbob

[Loucas12 in reply to Jimbob7]

That’s a fantastic reply and thank you for taking the time to do it. I have come to the conclusion that at the moment I do need some pills to even things out. Some days I have been able to habituate then started looking for the noise - crazy isn’t it. I have some days where it has been ok and others when I’ve just stayed in bed, especially weekends. Sort of lost my appetite for life. But I know I must keep going for my family’s sake, it’s like they are living it too. I going to read your message every time I get low, thanks so much.

[BASBUN in reply to Loucas12]

Do you have trouble sleeping with tinnitus? I have had tinnitus for 12 years now I take 3.5mg of Zopiclone to help me sleep if the tinnitus is really loud. It relaxes you to sleep and seems to help deaden the sound of tinnitus the next day, for me anyway. It might be worth a try to relax and calm you down temporarily. One of the top tinnitus Ent consultants in Essex prescribed these for me initially and I have used them with care ever since as they can become addictive.

[Steve1978 in reply to BASBUN]

Agree with BASBUN, interesting I too have 3.5mg (think it is actually 3.75mg) of Zopiclone. I got this when I first had tinnitus in Dec 2015, 7mg dose I felt was too strong for me as I felt the affects the next day. 3.75mg is thought of as a half dose I think.

3.75mg seems to be just enough to help me sleep, but not enough to cause spaced out feeling the next day. Sometimes it is just the psychological affect of having them there - the option is there of something you know can help if you really need it. I've got to the stage where I have only taken around 7 a year for the last 4-5 years, but as I say I'm sure having them as an option helps me to relax. However note that in my case it doesn't seem to have any positive or negative impact on the sound I hear.

[Steve1978 in reply to Loucas12]

Hello Loucas12

"some days I have been able to habituate" - that is a great early sign.

"I must keep going for my family's sake" - that is also good.

If you are already getting some sense of habituation that is very good news because you can build this over time. I was in a terrible state when this happened to me 9 years ago.

But your brain could really help you.

If you can get your emotions under control - that is easy to say and hard to do. Then really use your brain to focus on other things. I found I was not focusing and easily distracted by the noise. I had a terrible Xmas 2015.

But I will always remember this turning point. I was painting my bathroom, not something I do often, did it for 6 hours straight. I didn't want to do it, I wasn't emotionally capable of doing it - but I forced myself. Had music on and had these disposable vinyl type (?) painting gloves on. The sound of the music, plus the sound of the rustling of the glove as I painted and concentrating hard on the act of painting meant I was not hearing my tinnitus. My brain had totally moved it's focus away from it.

I then thought how is that possible - I was hearing this noise 24/7 but now I went 6 hours and did not hear it once. How? it lead me to the answer was to always have background sound and to stop being lazy and really concentrate my brain on other things. My brain could not focus on two things at once and with sound it the back ground and concentrating on my thinking or the task I was doing. And this is where sleep is key because your concentration and level of focus is much higher on good sleep.

Sound was my shield to tinnitus and my brain/focus/concentration was my sword.

If someone said to me 9 years ago this was possible, I would not have believed them. But the brain is a powerful thing.

I'm back here as I need to reapply these techniques as I probably have something called dysacusis. It is a form of distorted hearing to certain sounds, sounds like wind, boilers, fans, heaters, fridges, traffic, a/c units. I'm trying now to use the same techniques to habituate to these sounds as they now sound different to me, my emotional reaction has also not been good. The distortion of the sounds caused a negative reaction, but I'm trying to think well these sounds are meaningless so why should I bother about them? There is a good chance the dysacusis will go away. Therefore I am writing this to help myself as much as I hope it helps you.

"I must keep going for my family's sake" - that is great because it gives you a sense of purpose. My son was 7 when this happened to me back in Dec 2015 - he never knew I had it but he pulled me through by giving me something to live for and to try for. I just threw everything into him and devoted myself to him. He was my medicine.

The level of the sound your are experiencing can reduce over time. It is a shock at first. And always remember much of the high percentage group who are having success are no longer posting here, they are back enjoying their lives and there is every chance you will join them.

[Loucas12 in reply to Steve1978]

Thank you for such a fantastic and honest post. I had such a good day yesterday and got up today feeling terrible because of my sleep. It seems such a rollercoaster that we’re on. Some days I have the reserves and some days nothing at all, just existing. I wish I could get my emotions in order as I know this helps. I will read your message when I get low, thanks again.

[Steve1978 in reply to Loucas12]

Loucas12, I remember all this so well from 9 years ago. I could not sleep and therefore the sound seemed to get worse because my brain did not have the power and focus to push the sound away.

"some days I have the reserves" agree I have been there. "just existing" - yes me too.

If you can do everything you can to get sleep on track. I slept with background noise for about 2 years but got there in the end. The brain seems to focus on the other sounds and then pushes the tinnitus away. People told me this 9 years ago and I didn't believe them - but wow they were right. I'm the biggest sceptic - it sounded like some kind of made up magic this habituation stuff. Can't believe I have managed to habituate.

[Loucas12 in reply to Steve1978]

I started using background noise at night and most times that seems to work, I have used anti histamines a few times lately but don’t like the hangover I seem to get. But you are right, looking back a few months the sound is not so horrific, it’s just putting it in the background is challenging

[Steve1978 in reply to Jimbob7]

Jimbob7 - your posts are remarkable - they do a power of good to many who read. I cannot thank you enough for taking the write in such a way.

But what about you? How are you doing now after such a tough year?

As I've said elsewhere habituation took time for me, nearly 3 years 2016-2018, but for others it can be faster. I refused to take any medication despite being offered anti-depressants. Looking back now I may have got to habituation faster if I had calmed down quicker by taking pills in the short term. I could not accept the condition in the early days. For over 5 years 2019-2024 I hardly noticed it. Coming back a little stronger over the last few months but doing my best.

[Jimbob7 in reply to Steve1978]

Thank you very much indeed Steve. How kind of you to say so.

I also find your posts very informative and useful. I guess that's how it works!

[Steve1978 in reply to Jimbob7]

Hello Jimbob7 - have you found your level of sound has reduced over the last few months? I hope it has.

[Jimbob7 in reply to Steve1978]

Yep, so, mine started following a cervical injury in April. Did the pill-popping for the first couple of months and then setlled down to do the heavy-lifting in to habituation. If I'm honest - the T some days is as loud as it ever has been but, as you will know yourself, out attention is the thing that has drifted away from it. That's the fundementals of habituation; the T's not gone quieter - we've just drifted away from it.

Of course, if I'm at a low ebb -the T comes rushing back and one has to go back to brass tacks and work the program. I suppose another facet of habituation is the fact that we know the work we have to do and are able to complete it in a timely manner - those periods of pain and noise are less, the more accomplished we become at doing that.

[Jimbob7]

There's nothing wrong with getting some extra help on top of the hard work you are already doing. It gets to me every now and then too - my GP is a good guy who undertsands when I tell him we need to hit the ejector seat for a couple of days - what we mean by that is a small dose of diazepam - just 2mg for maybe three or four days. Just to get away from it, maybe I haven't been sleeping well, maybe the whole thing is just getting on top of me. There's enough trust there now between he and I that he knows if I ask for it - I mean it.

Sometimes just knowing that that option is there is enough to cope. Haven't actually had to do that for about three months now. But it's there if I need it and if I do - there's no good reason I can see not to avail myself of it. Doing this T stuff is hard enough - sometimes we just need a break.

[Waju14160]

I’ve commented on this before, I get up in the morning and make myself a coffee - then check my email and there’s often one from this site. As soon as I read about tinnitus I can hear it! I’m sure I couldn’t while I wasn’t thinking about it!

[Steve1978 in reply to Waju14160]

Waju14160 I agree with you. The brain is remarkable, how can I go hours without hearing it then I think of it and there it is? When I first got tinnitus 9 years ago I heard it almost 24/7 most days for 3 years. Last 6 years and I hardly notice it. My brain has learned to filter it out.