Midwife appointments - are they worth it

[monkeys1]

So I've had 2 midwife appointments now and I'm really finding they're a waste of time,

the first - booking app was filling out forms bloods etc no problem but my second today was just blood pressure etc I had some questions and haven't been feeling great but felt like I was just being brushed off and the whole appointment was a waste of time.

I know I'm sounding cynical but is anybody else finding this?

[Hidden]

These midwife appointments are good if you have any worrying concern and need a quick referal to the nearest NHS Centre/ hospital.

When i had my first child in 2008 i had a few appointment which felt like a "total waste of time" but i used it as a opportunity to get those "rediculous"questions out of my head.

My immediate thought is to just show your face because i can't wait to hear a heartbeat of my 2nd child "which to me is the best part of the appointment"

[monkeys1]

Well you see I asked my silly questions and some not so silly but felt that they were just brushed off to rush me out of the door my husband was with me he thought the same.

Ah well I'll see how the next one goes lol

[Neska]

I'm with you there monkeys1. I think its a waste of time.having pregnancy with complications i thought my midwife would be there to support me and talk to me about my worries.instead she rushes filling the forms.both of my appointments were big dissapointments.she didnt explain my blood results or anything.i found in my book that last month i had urine infection and was on antibiotics which is not true!!!i had a bleeding last weekend and hospital adviced me to contact midwife as it wasnt that heavy.all she meant to do is listen to babys heart.i rang her today 15times!!! No answer!!! I find it disgusting.i went to my surgery to

ask for different midwife but they are difficult.the receptionist even asked me whats this time?!!!i give up with these people.lucky i've got my consultant on friday so i can just moan to him but they know me in hospital and at least they've been good.i think some ppl shouldnt have certain jobs if they have no passion for it!!!

[wendywoo82]

I agree with you the second appointment can feel a little useless, just checking blood pressure and urine etc but it is all important! These checks are done to detect any early problems which could lead to gestational diabetes etc. But I like to think if your not in there for long then all is good! It is a good time to ask any niggling little questions you may have, I can see from some other ladies on here they have not had good experiences with their midwives, but mine is fantastic! Always there if I need anything at all! On your next appointment you should get to hear babys heartbeat if you have not already, but you may end up finding that the rest of your appointments will be the same! Pee test bp check and "how are you doing" but rest assured its all for the good even if it is short and sweet! Good luck and take care and try not to get too disheartened by it! Xx

[PJ2013]

I would agree with you. My first appointment was very informative which was great. We got lots of information and felt pleased. Since then we feel completely alone. Our second appointment was a short one just heartbeat urine and blood pressure but I felt the midwives were bored and didn't want to be there. I suppose they r stuck in this tiny room all day doing the same thing hearing the same silly questions so I can understand the boredom. But for me it's my first baby and haven't a clue. My third appointment (20 week scan) I didn't even see a midwife. I ended up booking an appointment with my doctor to get my questions answered.

[Skyblueboston]

My next appt is my 25 weeks, only two weeks away, gone so fast the first appt was boring but she was funny and so we had a giggle, 2nd appt was bp, urine, hb check on baby, she was happy, upbeat and I asked a few questions and she answered them, I felt happy with the service I have also visited the maternity assessment unit twice and the midwives have been so lovely, there was even a nun on the ward she was nice too!

I did expect them to maybe give you information about why to expect next etc, but I guess as long as all your checks are fine they don't worry and move to the next women. On all occasions I could see there was so many women waiting to see them, poor them, I think there needs to be more midwives

What surprised me is that I have never seen the same midwife once! So I'm assuming I won't know the midwife that will be with me in my labour! But hey maybe coz the pain will be awful I won't care lol

I do understand what monkeys1 is saying we are left to our own devices, but I now understand why! Coz untill 24 weeks pregnant they won't save your baby if u went into labour, untill 24 weeks they say your pregnancy is not viable. Horrible I know! Hence why I can't wait to get to this milestone

Thank god for this forum it's brilliant and a great way to get your questions and worries out xx

[tigernoodles]

these appointments are not a waste of time at all. they are essential to check that you and your baby are healthy and there are no problems developing.

I'm sorry your midwife doesn't seem all that great but my midwife is wonderful, she's given me loads of information on pregnancy exercise classes, ante natal classes, when I've had back problems she referred me really quickly, she is always there to comfort me when I turn up in floods of tears and is so lovely with it, she makes me feel very relaxed and calm about the whole pregnancy and encourages you to ask silly questions. I asked her the other day how many nappies I should take to the hospital!!

there are other methods of getting this information, my midwife is a community midwife and I see her each time. if you are seeing your midwife at a hospital, you may be able to request a different one or change the hospital you are planning to give birth in (if possible) and get a different midwife that way. either that or call your doctor and ask for a phone appointment to ask them any questions or anything you are worried about.

[Rachelhaley]

Since I switched to the home birth team, my new midwife has been fab. I think at the surgeries they have a time slot and have so many ladies to see it does sometimes feel rushed, however my midwife now comes to my house and is fantastic. So kind and helpful, I feel very lucky! She's here for ages. This is my third pregnancy and she even took the time to show my boys how baby was laying using a teddy. A much different experience this time. Hope yours gets better!

[Comet1]

It all seems a bit hit and miss, typical NHS I'm afraid! I do think the appointments are important, so far I think my midwife and support staff have been really nice. And whenever ive called them, the receptionist has been polite and helpful. I've only had the booking in appointment so far though. The midwife did explain a little bit about how they work to me. At my hospital, they work in teams, there are 5 midwives to a team, so I could see all 5 of them through the course of my pregnancy. She also said that they are only allowed 15mins per woman (after the booking appt, obviously) and she admitted that this really isn't enough, that she always feels rushed. That they have to fill out paper work 3 times for each woman - ridiculous, no wonder they get a little tired of it! She told me what to expect in the follow up apps, urine test, bld pressure and listen to the babies heart - so not expecting a long appt anyway. This is my second pregnancy, just over 10 weeks, but first ended in miscarriage some years ago, but for some reason, I'm not that nervous - yet anyway!

I have had a lot of experience with doctors and nurses though, unfortunately, and I would say that there are always good and bad ones, that's just the way it is. Try to find one in your team that you like and trust and just go to them with your questions, try not to worry about the ones you're not getting on with, but also, don't let them bully you. Stand up for your rights as a patient to be heard. Take a list of questions on paper with you, this helps signal to them that you have something important to say and it helps you to say it succinctly. Lastly, at least pregnancy (a healthy one) isn't an illness, so there are steps/stages that we all expect to go through. This forum, your family and friends with children are great resources of information.

Good luck!

[Amy1]

I agree totally, 2nd baby and this midwife has not got a clue. Anything i ask she says oh don't worry about it without even answering the question.

I rang and asked to change, they said they would put a note in the folder so she wouldn't get sent to me.

I have spoken to 2 other Mothers who have the same one and we all agree she is incompetant at her job, nice enough person but I don't need a friend i need a midwife.

What a waste of time so i shall ignore them from now on and just listen to other Mothers or figure it out for myself.

[monkeys1]

I get what every body is saying and it's really interesting how different everybody is finding things. Mine didn't even ask how I was and when I started to tell her she was not at all interested so I gave up.

Unfortunately she's the only one at our surgery I'm going consultant led from 20 week scan so hopefully that'll shed some more light.

Definitely find I get more information on here and through my aps lol!!

Thanks guys!!

[Blue321]

I felt that I didn't know what was going on my second appt. Different midwife. Urine, bloods, note-checks, heart-beat. Lots of computer work, whilst we sat there in silence. Afterwards, any questions? Then rushed out the door.

Make sure you tell your consultant everything. Mine didn't know a critical fact that had been told to many people before and I thought was written in notes. Because it may have impacted on my risk score he nearly jumped out of his skin when I told him.

Sounds like there may be a couple of issues: feeling like the specialist is incompetent and/or feeling like they have little patient care and are really rushed.

Best midwife I saw was after my 12 week scan, she was really nice! Never saw her again, or had such an appointment again, though.