12 Week Scan Anxiety

[Emch42]

Hi all

Not sure why I'm writing here really and feel I'm just going to end up rambling on here about how nervous I am but hoping to gain some reassurance

I had my booking in appointment with my midwife last week and we expect that my NHS scan appointment will come in around Christmas time

As my parents are going away for Xmas my SO and I wanted to have a scan prior to them going so we could tell them about the pregnancy before they leave so we booked a private scan

It's booked for tomorrow and I'm in my 11th week, but I'm absolutely irrationally terrified of something being wrong - looking on here at other posts I can see that it's not that uncommon, but I can't help but feel alone

I've been struggling sleeping all week and the thought of waiting another 24 hours is quite literally driving me towards an anxiety attack

I've heard of and seen so many stories lately of people going for early scans and two weeks later turning up to their NHS scan to be told in the interim of the two scans the pregnancy has ended and I feel like even if tomorrow goes well it's going to worry me until I go for my next one, and then am I just going to be the same then being anxious until my 20 week scan?

It's our first pregnancy and I'm so nervous of something going wrong... I have suffered with anxiety in waves for most of my life so it's not uncommon for me to be feeling like this, but I just can't concentrate on anything and I'm now worrying I'll be like this throughout...

I feel like I'm causing myself unnecessary stress but taking my mind of it isn't really cutting it at the moment

[Jenwales88]

I know how you feel. I was so scared every scan and every midwife check up. The only advice I can give is the usual breathing exercises and self talk. Something like 'just because something can be wrong doesn't mean it will' or just 'everything will be fine'I know saying it's normal won't help. And you might find when you go to your scan the excitement of seeing your baby will take over. I really wish I could help you as I understand. I often have to remind myself that I often worry about things that never happen.

You will be OK though. If there is anything you can do to keep calm, make yourself feel better then do it. And know you're not alone in this.

[GemX81]

I was so nervous with every scan and appointment when I was pregnant with my two boys. For me because of previous losses, just added to the anxiety. I had already been through the losses before getting to the first scan phase. I would keep reminding yourself that today you are pregnant and all is well. And how lucky and blessed you are to carry your little one. That's what got me through. You are not alone. And if your anxiety is too much speak to your midwife, partner etc. Just talking about your worries and saying them out loud help relieve them. Good luck and wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy!

[Peke88]

Don't worry about how much you are worrying, it happens to us all! I was exactly like you when I was pregnant with my first last year, never really wanted to imagine my little one in case something bad happened. To be honest, for me the sensation never really went away until he was born! I did feel a bit better after the scans though, and started to relax a bit at about the 32 week mark. Days and weeks feel painstakingly slow, and there's not much you can do about it 😅 best thing you can do is what you are doing, sharing your feelings, talking through it helps. All the best to you, stay strong!!

[Billybob_1]

I was exactly the same with my little one, I googled like mad and with every stage convinced myself this could happen or that could happen. I even asked my midwife if I could have a stitch put in my cervix because of a condition I’d read about - she just kept reassuring me and told me to stop googling, which did help to be fair but I worried throughout. I had a lovely, easy pregnancy, physically, but mentally and emotionally, I just wanted him here and I now somewhat regret not enjoying the pregnancy more as I should have. We are all different and no matter how much someone tells you to stop worrying, you are who you are, it’s not just a switch we can turn off- but it’s preparing you for motherhood and all the joy and worry that brings, just keep talking and tell your midwife your concerns - I promise he/ she will have heard it all before! Good luck in your scan and seeing your baby for the first time, it’s magical x

[Seb9]

My first pregnancy ended in a missed miscarriage, I had already told several of my closest friends and family that I was pregnant, and that for me was the best decision because when it didn't work they were immediately there for me and I didn't have to hide or pretend like nothing bad had happened. They were all very supportive and I am glad had them every step of the way. My second pregnancy, I was convinced it was going to fail too and was shocked when the scan showed a little wave of baby, I went on to have 2 children.

While it's natural to worry, the way I dealt with it was to share my worries and to prepare for the worst, but hope for the best.

Good Luck x

[GenieW]

Hi there, I'm sorry to hear this is causing you so much stress and anxiety, it's such a nerve wracking time isn't it! I have my 12 week scan and screening tests in just under a week now and I'm getting anxiety in waves, worrying about all the things that could go wrong. I try to manage my anxiety the best I can with meditation and other methods but it still comes and goes . I don't think I'm being much help to you here but I wanted you to know that you're not alone. I wish you all the best for your scan and I am sure everything will be just fine for you. Hang in there x

[Pink-rain]

how did your scan go and you’re Pregnacy now ? Hoping all is well 🙏🏻🙌🏻🫶🏻

[Jogsandwalks]

Yes probably throughout. It definitely was for me anyway. From the time got the positive result to the time he came out of me, I felt exactly like this. I almost didn't want to go the 12 week scan in case there was nothing there. It's very strange feeling. I envy women who enjoy their pregnancy, how on earth do you enjoy it? Good luck with your scan, your feelings are 'normal'. You can do it!

[HollyT7 in reply to Jogsandwalks]

I was exactly the same. it was an absolute killer, had lots of private scans and that didn't even ease the worry. thankfully it was much better with our second frostie. I thought I'd cry when we had our first but I was just like oh... its a baby, I think I still didn't think I would end up with one x

[Jogsandwalks in reply to HollyT7]

Haha, ikr! They always show them crying on One Born Every Minute and these birthing shows but I nope, not a tear for me. When he came out, like you, I was also like, ok I guess it's a baby and also like thank goodness that's over.

[HollyT7 in reply to Jogsandwalks]

I actually thought this was the fertility forum I?m on so this makes me feel better for feeling like it. I thought it was just because of ivf but seems its totally normal!

[Jogsandwalks in reply to HollyT7]

Weirdly, and completely gratefully, I got pregnant within one month of coming off contraception but that made it no easier. I really feel for women who've gone through IVF. Must be so anxiety inducing