My first daughter goes to sleep with out a diaper and urinates in her sleep and doesn't wake up

Hello, I have three children and my second child (4 years old), first daughter goes to sleep with out putting on a diaper. And she urinates in her sleep. She is not cooperating with me in order to change her and put on a diaper. Sometimes she even kicks her quilt staying uncovered. It can take me up to two hours to make her cooperate and I find this very excausting. Would you leave her sleeping with wet cloths and uncovered or would you percist to change her? Why doesn't she want to put her diaper on, since she obviously still need it(only for her night sleep)?

[Kavanaughkj]

I don’t have an old enough child to comment, but I was a bed-wetter myself; my parents ended up getting this plastic sheet with an alarm attached that went off every time I wet the bed, waking me up. I had to be changed, so did the bed, and then I went back to sleep. I would have been dreaming I was on the toilet when I did this! At 4 I can understand why she wouldn’t want a nappy - maybe you could try something like this? I wouldn’t leave her as she’s unlikely to wake up or learn what she’s doing wrong. It took effort and perseverance but it did eventually work for me ... back then I think they said the gp gave them the sheet. I’m not sure where you’d get one now.

[Hidden in reply to Kavanaughkj]

Thank you very much for your advice. I must firstly understand how she is feeling and then if she really wants to sleep with no nappy we must try what you are suggesting. Also, I must explain that she needs to cooperate so that she can quickly go back to sleep.

[Wondering20]

Have you had a talk with her about it when you have felt calm enough to do so? It could be that she is having a persistent dream about going to the toilet, or it could be a sign that she is struggling with something in everyday situations, such as a bully at school, the arrival of a new sibling, she feels uncomfortable with someone else, or that she has a medical issue! I’d definitely have that chat in a calm and loving way, let her know if there is anything upsetting her that she can confide in you, that you won’t be angry and that you love her very much.

Moving forwards, assuming that nothing of note comes from your talk with her, I would most definitely try not to make a scene about it in the night time. I would try not talking at all when needing to get her and the bed changed, after all she is used to it and it might doing it for attention, however ‘negative’ that attention may be. You’ll probably need to take deep breaths to stay calm about it in the wee hours (not easy I know!) Then in the morning don’t mention it at all but praise her for all the things that she does well, even the little things like eating breakfast, playing nicely with toys etc. It might take a while for you to get used to doing things this way if you don’t already, but my advice is to be persistent about it.

Failing that, if it continues for a couple of months and you’ve tried everything you can think of, I would definitely take her to a doctor to rule out any underlying medical issue.

Best of luck!

[Hidden in reply to Wondering20]

Thank you so much for your reply. I must definitely work on praising the positive things she accomplishes like getting dressed up by her self, making a drawing. I always say to my self to be positive and many times I realise that I am being critical and strict. New beginning with more love and understanding