Absolutely heart broken: Been for the... - Pregnancy and Par...

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Absolutely heart broken

hannahm27 profile image
24 Replies

Been for the 12 week scan this morning to be told that there was no heartbeat. They reckon i miscarried at 9 weeks given the size and there seemed to be lots of fluid round baby. I am absolutely heart broken and devastated. Ive never felt hurt like it :(

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hannahm27 profile image
hannahm27
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24 Replies

Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry for your loss :-( x

scoffcat profile image
scoffcat

So, so sorry for your loss.

DrFluffy profile image
DrFluffy

Really sad to read your news. Don't bottle things up, make sure you talk to those closest to you - they will all want to be there for you and help you through this dark time xx

2princes1princess profile image
2princes1princess

Devastating news :-( so very sorry hun xxx

Im so so sorry to hear your news. I had a similar experience just over a year ago but still have no magic words of wisdom that will make you feel any better. As others have suggested keep talking about your feelings to your other half and any family or friends for support. The pain will ease in time, it's a cliche but it is very very true xxxx

Numbers profile image
Numbers

I'm so very sorry to hear your news. Thinking of you. X

stephieceeee profile image
stephieceeee

I am so sorry that you have had this news. There is nothing anyone can say to make you or anyone else feel better about this situation. I experienced a loss at 17 weeks. Went for my scan and was told they estimated miscarriage was 2/3 weeks previously and baby had trisomy. Was told that we were lucky baby had survived to that point and I was booked for a D&C. The shock was devestating and just felt complete and utter heartbreak as we had only recently told family and friends. I wish I could say it gets easier, it doesn't but in time the emotions will become less raw. Not a day goes by where I don't think about it all. All I can advise is grieve. Take all the you time you need to, to try and deal with what you are feeling and express it and take all the support from those around you. Thinking of you at this time, hope you are okay xxxxxxxxx

GJ78 profile image
GJ78

So so sorry xx

Soo_H profile image
Soo_H

Aww hun, it is the worst feeling in the world and my heart goes out to you. Lots of good advice on this post here though, grieve, talk and take your time. Thinking of you xxx

dspencer profile image
dspencer

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I too suffered a miscarriage earlier this year, I lost line at 7 weeks after a scan at 6 weeks.

My heart goes out to you. I found it really useful to read the wealth of information on the miscarriage associations website. Lots of really friendly support.

The other thing that people don't tell you is that miscarriage is extremely common and you will go on to have a healthy baby, those thoughts really helped me get through the dark times.

Take care lots of hugs

Donna

x x

Cowgirl7 profile image
Cowgirl7

We went through this a year ago, nothing can prepare you for this news and the whole thing plays over and over in your mind, one of life's moments that you wish you could just erase or at least rewind. Like others have said, talking helps a lot, and I decided to tell a few colleagues at work so that they spread the word, that way everyone was aware why I wasn't myself but I didn't have to explain over and over, or try and pretend all was fine. I was shocked how many quietly described their own losses, from early MC to stillbirths, the support and understanding was amazing. I fell pregnant again 5 months later, I'm 32 weeks now, and I know that at the moment that will probably smart for you, but I hope it will give you some hope too. Those 5 months felt like forever, I was convinced my body just wasn't geared up for it, and only recently have I let myself believe that it will be ok this time. Good luck, be strong when you feel like it and let yourself grieve when you need to.

cheekymonkey3791 profile image
cheekymonkey3791

Am so very very sorry to hear of your loss, it's such a sad and personal loss and you will find most likely no one will truly understand how you feel unless they have experienced it themselves....many many women on here have so it is a good place to come for support.

I have experienced 2 losses in the 1st trimester, the 2nd one was last September and now I have a healthy young boy. I too found the misscarriage association website very helpful for my last loss & I had a loving and supportive partner, something I was not privy too with my 1st MC and it makes all the difference during recovery so I truly hope that you have a very supportive partner, friends and family.

You will need to give yourself lots of time to recovery physically and then mentally, it's a bumpy road but you will find peace in time. Xx

jowalk6 profile image
jowalk6

SO sorry for your loss. I had a still birth at term last year. Don,t bottle it up. Cry when you need to cry. I hope you find the strength. My thoughts are with you x

wizzywoo profile image
wizzywoo

oh gosh I'm so sorry you have had to go through something so traumatic. I too went through the same thing - went for 12 week scan to find it had actually stopped growing at 8 weeks. I had 3 further miscarriages and am now 20 weeks pregnant so am positive that things will work out this time. As all the others have said on here the only thing that helped me was talking. Because I didn't have anyone in my very close network who had been through it themselves I felt I needed just to talk through some of the emotions I was going through with someone who had been there. So, like others on here I contacted the miscarriage association and actually met up with one of their volunteer counsellors who had first hand experience of what I was going through. I found this so helpful as she was totally neutral and helped me understand why my partner actually struggled with supporting me, and helped me understand the grieving process I was going through and what to expect further down the line. I think these things always stay with you but as others have said the pain definitely heals with time. Just know that just because this has happened this time does not mean that you wont be successful next time. Just take your time to grieve and you will know when the time is right for you to try again. Sending you loads of positive thoughts and hugs xx

Anniendave profile image
Anniendave

So sorry for your loss xx <3

melanie22282 profile image
melanie22282

Just wanted to say speaking to a counsellor or therapist can really help too - ask your GP if you feel you would benefit.

Thoughts are with you xx

So sorry for your loss x

lady123 profile image
lady123

I know exactly how you feel. Last Saturday I started bleeding. I had my 12 week scan on Monday, where they couldn't find a heartbeat. On Monday night, I miscarried the baby completely. I went back to work on Thursday, as soon as I felt physically fit, just because I didn't want another day of staying at home crying round the corners. It did help, but I can't help feeling completely empty, like nothing really has much of a purpose. I hope things will get better on time for both of us.

cheekymonkey3791 profile image
cheekymonkey3791 in reply tolady123

You poor thing :-( I have an angel on our Xmas Tree that takes pride of place for our loss last September, I conceived again 3 months later and now have the most precious little boy...don't give up hope X

Jewles profile image
Jewles

So sorry for your loss! Don't bottle anything up, iv gone throught this too and it does help to talk.

Xx

Allyemo1985 profile image
Allyemo1985

Sorry to hear such sad news. Thoughts are with you. Talk and rest xx

-insomnia- profile image
-insomnia-

Oooh, so sorry to hear that:((

blackmadona profile image
blackmadona

So sorry dear.

Dancing_doris profile image
Dancing_doris

So sad to hear your bad news, we are all here to support, as you've seen there are so many of us that have experienced the same or similar. I mc at about 8 weeks last time and have just reached 9 weeks this time around, so nervous for the next few weeks but got to stay positive. Agree with the others, it really does help to talk, I was amazed at how many other women I know had their own story to share and you feel far from alone, it made me realise that as heartbreaking as it was, it was normal and as you can see from the lovely ladies here so many have very happy stories to tell the next time around. Take time, look after yourself, talk if you need to xx

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