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[anbuma]

feeling so tearful today.when I hollered at my dogs as soon as they started barking when I let them out in the garden.came in and started crying.took them for their walk.went to tescos came home had lunch but could barely eat it.went fro my afternoon nap but couldnt sleep for crying-all I can feel is pressure against my ribs and abdominal wall and know its soemthign serious.its like you can cut the atmosphere in here with a knife-the way my dogs are.thinking how manytimes have I told my doctor and consultant I cannot eat cos always feel full-never hungry and it sbeing going on for at least 2 years with bloating only mentioned this year -after I saw a private dr.now I have pelvic pain too.also being classed as obese when the only area on me that is huge is my stomach-normal or thin everywhere else.wantign to call dr fro an appointment as i dont have anyone else to talk to but know there wont be any and so scared that something might happen before my appointment booked on jan 9th.i need to be here for my dogs.

[Hidden]

I am sorry to hear you arent the best today. You are probably sad after losing your friend and everything is getting to you; My advice is get dressed put on some make up, it might be tough but anything is better than being inside. Go out and walk even for ten minutes with the dogs. Stop and listen to the birds in the gardens or the traffic. Try and feel happy because you are able to do those few things. Then tomorrow, repeat and go for a longer walk. You will feel happier and your sad thoughts will go away a little.

[anbuma in reply to Hidden]

thank you for your kind words.i really do enjoy my walks with my dogs .am lucky to live in a semi rural town surrounded by farms and countryside so dont have to walk far to enjoy wildlife and fantastic scenery.i have a bird table outside my front window (which stood for years in my back garden where i couldn't see it)and i have a family of sparrows 2 turtle doves,starlings and the occasional crow and bluetits in the summer.i even looked out one morning and there was a mouse sitting on it.

to put a damper on things as soon as i get up I feel the pressure in my abdomen against my clothes and know it is a mass off some kind.I am used to getting up in the summer months and going straight for a dog walk but now its winter have to wait til its almost daylight before Buster is ready to go out.wheni get home my thoughts turn to how I have been dismissed by drs/consultants and should I take things further and complain to ombudsman.probably wont get me anywhere as complaining to PM and PALS had no effect.when I find out my blood results on Monday and they recognize I have something more than "just bloating " and fibro.tell him I want to see ENT and rheumy again to listen to what is their department not dismiss sme and go on about things that are not heir concern

anbuma