I'm looking for a "clutter buddy" for mutual support in throwing things away

Hi everyone,

I'm new to this forum, and this is my first post. I have used the BLF forum for support with my lung problems and found them very friendly and helpful.

I've been diagnosed with OCD with hoarding so sorting things causes me extreme anxiety, although I've been able to make some progress recently even a short session (like I've done today) exhausts me and leaves me exhausted, and feeling very low as I feel I've done so little .... and have so much more still to do that it seems never ending.

I've been to OCD support groups, which are very helpful, and once to a hoarding support group which was helpful but as it's so far away and is a difficult time for me to reach there and get back again (especially with my anxieties about travelling to the area).

I recall one of the ladies at the hoarding support group was going to setup a system for people who wish to have a "clutter buddy" but I never had any follow-up and can't remember where to look for contact details to check if I'll get one. I feel it would really help me to acknowledge the progress I'm making and feel more positive.

A "clutter buddy" can be someone on the end of a phone, or perhaps Skype could be used, for mutual support in our struggle against my problem throwing things away - which for me is caused by an exaggerated need to sort everything and to ensure everything is recycled or re-used, I hate putting things in the rubbish unless it's really what I consider rubbish - food waste, damaged item.

I've got a few black bags filling up, which is surprisingly good for me in view of my OCD, but I struggled to actually secure them and put them outside in the "wheely bins" on my own - but I managed to do it last Friday (whew !)

I do hope there is a fellow sufferer (or two) here in the forum who can provide me such much needed support, and who I can offer support to as well.



3 Replies

  • Hi Hun I do suffer with OCD but not really in the way u do. I can't throw out things like teddies or ornaments as I feel they would be sad. Mine is rituals really but I would be more than willing to help you along via text or email or even FB as I am having CBT and it is helping me so much just thru talking. I find it lovely to chat with someone that doesn't think I'm a complete nutcase lol everyone needs someone that understands. I have some truly good friends but they will never understand how debilitating OCD can be x sending hugs x Tina

  • Hi Julia,

    Welcome to the forums.

    I have to be honest, I am not sure a "clutter buddy" would be helpful. I don't want to be negative, but I have to share our past experiences to help you.

    Part of the problem is we have to challenge our OCD doubts and uncertainty, and using a 'buddy' could inadvertently end up using that person for reassurance, which as we know can be unhelpful for OCD.

    Then of course it could be the person you are asking for advice, whilst may be well meaning, I have often seen people on forums like these give the wrong advice to others.

    Do you have the help of the MH services, a psychologist you can talk to when you need advice? I think that might be a better option for you.

    Finally, I would always advice caution in exchanging personal contact details offline. It is not something we would endorse. People on the forums are for the most part lovely kind people, but again, in the past we have seen problems when people have exchanged personal details, so I would advise caution to all if deciding to exchange personal details.



    on behalf of OCD-UK

  • This may seem hardly like advice but theres a TV show on Channel 4 (which is available on 4oD) called "The Hoarder Next Door" which gives a lot of advice and understanding on why some of us hoard and ways to get around it. Sorry I couldnt be of more help, goodluck! x

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