Anxiety is really bad today and targeting my marriage!! I’m absolutely terrified! I really don’t ever want to break up with my husband he is my world and my best friend. When my anxiety is high that’s all I’m imagining happening.... I imagine falling out of love with him and leaving him and just the thought of it really is terrifying me!! Someone please help is this normal? I’m really freaking out 😪😪
I can’t cope with this!! : Anxiety is really bad... - OCD Support
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I can’t cope with this!!
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Vickylou30
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Poor you. I went through a really bad spell of anxiety last year and my long-term partner felt like a complete stranger to me at times. When he spoke, I felt like I didn't know him. I was in a constant fearful state. I tried explaining to him what was going on and then I worried even more that he'd think I was completely mad and leave me. And of course, the more you think about it and worry about it, the more your anxiety increases. It's really horrible and you have my utter sympathy. Have you tried CBT? It's not a cure-all but it certainly helps get yout thoughts back into some kind of perspective. I can also recommend daily mindfullness meditation with "Headspace". Certainly worth a try. It really helped me. You have to stick with it as there are no overnight cures but it's certaily put me back on track. Good luck! 
xx
Hi Vicky it sounds to me that your anxiety could be a combination of anxiety and OCD , do you suffer from intrusive thoughts, is just a thought as I suffer from a combination of OCD and anxiety. By the sounds of it, it is effecting your marriage. I suggest go to a doctor that specialises in Anxiety and OCD, look online for NHS specialist. Its nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about as 1 in 4 people suffer with anxiety and other mental health issues. They should be able to recommend a course of action. Good Luck . Rusty1970.
Hi Rusty1970 yes I do also suffer with ocd and get a lot of intrusive thoughts. I worry and obsessive about anything bad that could possibly ever happen, eg my marriage failing, ever hurting anybody etc it plagues me every single day. It also switches themes quite regularly so once I feel I’m on top of it and coping well ocd decides to throw me another fear 
I’m currently on citalopram but I’m unsure if they are right for me so I’m booked in to speak to my doctor. I’m also waiting for cbt but have been waiting since November and heard nothing yet! Do you suffer from a similar sort of thing?
Best wishes
Vicky
Yes I do suffer from OCD intrusive thoughts, anxiety and I find myself panicking over silly things. The point is Vicky we are all different what medication works for one might not work for some one else. Doctors might not get the medication that's right for you correct. so do not be afraid Vicky to go back
It's really horrible the way OCD targets the things that matter most to us, like your relationship with your husband. It likes to undermine us where we feel it the most.
Don't let it. I know how difficult it is to silence intrusive thoughts, but you know that however strong OCD likes to think it is, your feelings for your husband are stronger. And from your previous posts, he sounds extremely decent and understanding, the sort of man you'd want to hold onto!
It's not for nothing that OCD is called the doubting disease. It makes people doubt their relationships, their sexuality, and all kinds of things that make them who they are. And the more they try to prove the OCD wrong, the more the OCD likes to bounce back.
It's not easy just to accept that the OCD is wrong, as we want proof that it's wrong! Do get professional help if you are not already getting it. CBT is good at helping you to challenge negative and wrong thinking.
There are some good OCD self help books on the market, but one that isn't actually for OCD that I've also found helpful is Mind over Mood by Dennis Greenberger and Christine A Padesky. I do hope you can kick OCD into touch!
Hi Sallyskins thank you so much for your reply! You are so right about ocd it never lets you rest and I feel like I always need certainty so I spend hours a day searching on google for answers.... yet nothing is ever enough 😢 I’m exhausted and the more I fear these thoughts come the worse they get but I can’t control it! I’m so so scared it’s going to make me believe I should leave my husband and that I don’t love him. He is my best friend and the last thing I ever want is to feel that way towards him... it’s torture!
I know how it is. It doesn't leave you alone without a fight, and the more attention you give it the worse it is. Try not to feed it by giving it attention. Try to concentrate on enjoying being with your husband. Perhaps not so much push the doubts away as let them float over you. It's exhausting to give into OCD demands and difficult to ignore them. But it's best not to ruminate more than you can help. The more you think it over the more the doubts come.
I take sertraline, 300 mg a day, plus a 5mg dose of something called aripiprazole which boosts the sertraline. Perhaps since you are going to speak to your doctor about meds ask about this.
Hi Vickylou30. Sorry you are going through this. I myself suffer from OCD and intrusive thoughts. Sometimes one sticks and sometimes my mind moves onto another one. What I have done is just try my hardest to replace my negative thoughts with positive ones. I also take alot of what other members post on here to heart. As they know how we are feeling and can relate. It's hard I know. It is terrifying!. When I had that thought about my husband, I would spend more time with him, tell him how I was feeling. I told myself we have been together 17 years and I only felt that way when my anxiety was bad. So it has to be anxiety!! And surely it is! Self-help has really given me some relief! I read the book by Dr. Claire Weekes, Self-Help for your Nerves. My husband decided that he would read it too. So we took this book and made it something we share together and talk about. I'm not cured by all means, but it has helped me realize that my thoughts were just that, thoughts. Hope you find some relief, take care.
Awww thank you all for you comments! It’s so good to know I’m not alone in this and that there is hope! My husband is my best friend and i don’t want this to ruin what we have.
I had this it’s relationship ocd...it’s horrible because there’s always a guilt there, the best thing I done was just talking about how I was feeling with my partner. Hope this helps.
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