Day 38 and wobbling for the first time :(

Patch came off about 7:30 too late to put another on and waste it however I am craving soooo bad now, Nic is really putting a number on me right now " look how fat and bloated you are Donna, have a fag and it will go down.... Look how much you are eating Donna have a fag and you will stop gorging...look how much you miss me and need me Donna..... Have a fag and all will well again....

AAAAAAARGH will I ever get off the patches and be content and nicotine free.... I am feeling bereft, and fed right up.... Maybe it's because an 11yr old boy in work was told his dad had died in the lobby today......Maybe it was the three girls going off to foster care while their mother cried... Maybe I just can't do this and never will be able to.... Maybe I'm a loser :(

14 Replies

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  • You my friend are not a looser, you are strong, but this is tough, so hang tight, get through tonight and anew day tomorrow.

    I to used the patch method, and for what it's worth I to was almost frightened of what would happen when I had to take a leap and go solo. Well nothing happened.

    You are doing amazing, if this was easy, no one would smoke would they?. But you can get and will get through tonight, I have faith in you, so have faith in your self.

    I do hope Donna that tomorrow is easier for you, but please just hold tight for tonight. You can do this I know you can.:)

  • Thanks love but as you know, it's not the quitting it's the staying quit and when I witness scenes like today I just think you know what? Fluck it..... I just haven't got the energy for this on top of everything else....knew it was too good to be true that I was sailing through :( :( xxx

  • Thankyou Tracey my lovely, what a kind person you are, I won't smoke, I'm in the bath and then bed, I'm shattered, I do really hope that tomorrow is a better day xx

  • Donna I can only do this messages as I'm *******s and you really pick your moments! You may have had a hard day, you may have had a hard week that will not change weather you smoke or not, if you want the easy life live like a hermit but that not living is it? This will pass put your head down and do this and in no way are you worthless you are a value member of this community and the people who know you personally. Bath, tab and bed never lose a quit at this time of night tomorrow will be different if it isn't YOU will deal with it xxx

    Tough love isnt going to work with me today hun I have never felt so vulnerable as I do right now... I won't smoke tonight I just needed to get it off my chest, today has been truly horrendous and it started well.... Children shouldnt have to go through what I've seen today :( x

  • I know cause Im the same, lets hope tom is a better day.

    xx

    Same yolk mate.... Same yolk xxx

  • 2 incidents in one day is too much for me.... Maybe I need to stop wearing my heart on my sleeve :( xx

  • No they shouldn't, I used to be a CP SW so I can have a good guess at how your day may have been really 💩. They tell you not to take it home but there are some things that you just can't switch off on cue. You have to have a really good bath, watch some really silly TV and have therapeutic sex.

    Thankyou Tea, I am truly drained and empty.... Your right it's impossible sometimes to not take it home with you I shall have a teapigs chamomile tea in a minute that's about as rock and roll as it will get tonight and then back for more of the same tomorrow.....x

  • You a loser :eek: Nah, never in a million years, chin up Donna this day is nearly over with and a new one tomorrow :) Yes it may have been have what you witnessed today but would you having a cig made it change in any shape or form? NO! Would you having a cig changed you in any shape or form? Yes, you would have felt like muck, dizzy, craving would have come back strongly, you would have put you on the "why did I do that" guilt trip and you would have thrown 38 days down the grid.

    You keep the cravings under control one at a time, you keep your money in you pocket and you keep your smoke free lungs smoke free.

    WOULD IT REALLY BE WORTH IT JUST FOR ONE PSYCHOLOGICAL DRAG?

    NOOOOOO ME THINKS.

    Head up girl, new day tomoz, if it does get a bit much then stick a patch on or whatever it takes just please don't have a fag.

  • How are things today Donna? I do hope you're feeling better.

    Thing is that you know from bitter experience that sometimes nic is going to throw a curved ball your way- usually after a pants day when you feel nothing will ever be any good ever again. If you can ride it out- and I know you can- you'll be that much stronger next time (and the fact that you've ridden it out will give you an ego-boost, which in itself will help you to feel better about things).

    Chin up- another day dawns and may it be a much, much better one for you. :)

  • Hiya, thanks all still here and still smoke free, feeling rather flat today but there is absoloutely no way I would throw this away, I've been here too many times, just wary about going nicotine free, will just go for it though xx

  • Just go for it :)

  • Glad to hear today was much better Donna! What a crap day you had but you won:D keep doing what your doing, because whatever your doing is brilliant! We will have hiccups and wobbles but we can get through them, by the hour if we have too! We are at an advantage because we know how quickly mr nic can creep up on us! The little sod! We shall not be fooled:p

  • Glad to hear today was much better Donna! What a crap day you had but you won:D keep doing what your doing, because whatever your doing is brilliant! We will have hiccups and wobbles but we can get through them, by the hour if we have too! We are at an advantage because we know how quickly mr nic can creep up on us! The little sod! We shall not be fooled:p

    I have 4 14mg patches left and one pack of 7mg, so in 11 days at around 8 weeks quit I will be going it alone! :eek: let's do this! X

  • Donna, hope u r much better today.

    My take is, don't do it. Regrets, is what we'll have, whenever we dropped off the wagon, and I've fallen off the path too many times to count.

    Craves can be really bad, and I know that feeling oh so well.

    1 minute/hour/day at a time, and we will get through it. Delay, kick the can down the road, say later, tomorrow, perhaps 2 days later, or next Monday, next week... and then see how it goes.

    I think this is truly living, the ups/downs/happies and sobs. We are not machines, and wearing our heart on the sleeves, is perfectly fine, I do believe.

    Titch and SteelFixer is right, fagging doesn't change one thing, simply makes everything worse. It's just nicodemon pschologically telling us it may make us feel better, but we know logically, its just nonsense.

    Dedicate this quit to yourself, you deserve so much more/better, good clean air for yourself.

    From halfway across the globe (almost), I'm with you and truly hope you will pull through.

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