Still going...

[nsd_user663_60348]

Morning All,

Ive only been off here a couple of days but it seems longer. Still I.L.L and its really starting to annoy me, but hey ho still plodding on......66 days today with 9 days of those CT, and Im still feeling ok, must admit though the last couple of days have been really REALLY stressful for me, and I have so been tempted to slip or find something to replace the crutch and I have been way t o close for comfort to giving in too....ive not done it..although I have no idea how!!! I think my mind is almost complete in its repair :confused:

Going to see "My Boss" tomorrow....she doesnt know ive ditched the patches lol

This is such a tough journey for me at the moment....im struggling to keep focused...its mad...I feel angry.....and I want a ciggie.....its that fight isnt it, that struggle for superiority over the ciggies.....maybe in a day or two it will go......

Anyway...my posts are normally positive so im sorry this one is a little off beat, but im feeling pretty down at the moment and struggling to lift myself...but in my normal style...Have we all got the Chrimbo decorations up yet!?? Its getting close!!! My OH still seems to be avoiding the outdoor tree discussion......I want one.......OH doesnt.......bah humbug!! lol

[nsd_user663_60348]

See...

this should help...if it works that is....

[nsd_user663_60348]

Thankyou

Thanks Debbie,

I am struggling at the moment, having a battle with my own mind I think...well I hope thats all it is......im at a point where I dont want to lose my quit, but im not bothered if I do....and thats my frame of mind :(:eek:

Still, im holding it, think its just cos ive so much in my life that im not happy about right now, and they are things I cant really change or do anything about....

[nsd_user663_53658]

Hi petal, I'm so sorry you're having a rubbish time at the moment. When you get through this and out of the other side knowing that the cigs didn't beat you, you're going to feel on top of the world. That sense of how strong you are (as Hawkeye would say, you're way stronger than a plant!) is going to amaze you.

I am sending you great big hugs and a little present to hopefully cheer you up. Nifty had Captain Kickass for these occasions but I have Xmas Ben! He never fails to cheer people up

Chin up, you're winning! Stick around here as much as you can, we'll give you a lift til you feel better x

[nsd_user663_54554]

You are way better than a plant!

I think that by month three you're starting to really get used to life without smoking, so when a difficult situation hits that makes you think 'smoke...' it can knock you sideways but only because you're not expecting it. 'Crutch' times are fewer and further between but that makes them feel that bit more severe - they're not really, and thinking about Xmas is a great distraction.

Would it help to know we have a six foot wicker reindeer in our front flowerbed that Mrs H won in a raffle, who's flashing red nose I'm considering putting somewhere else on his bodily bits just to embarrass the neighbours?

[nsd_user663_60348]

lmao Hawkeye!!! I agree with Kat73...you should do that!!

Karri, I do remember that post lol.....but im not sure if that's what it is...I think that so much has gone on over the last two to three weeks in my life, that with my illness shoved on top its all taken its toll and left me feeling miserable. All the advise you all gave me on this post made me look at Month 3 in a new light, so I was happy to punch it on the nose

Im just feeling incredibly low, which Ive never experienced before and I dont quite know how to eradicate it....the worst is....im not craving a ciggie....im just feeling that angry and frustrated that my head is saying that a ciggie is the only thing to calm me....but im also associating those feelings towards the fact I cant have one...does that make sense?

Ive been really calm and collected throughout my quit, level headed and all....Ive been proud of how I approached each day and managed to tell

myself to get a ****** grip when I needed too.....but im finding it so difficult at the moment....

Still chuckling about the reindeer and his red-might not be for long-nose

[nsd_user663_59305]

Hi Mel, quite a few of us have been sideswiped in the third month, some just a bit after. Apparently it takes 12 weeks to reprogramme the nicotine receptors in the brain, and usually all NRT, champix etc is removed after 12 weeks, for some of us this causes a complete meltdown as even though we've been on them 12 weeks we have been nicotine/chemical free for 12 weeks so the brain has a bit of catching up to do, that's my theory not medical fact though. I had a bit of a sticky time halfway through my third month, I really was a bad mood looking for a reason - I got through it by munching family sized bags of Malteasers/M&M's, drinking copious amounts of red wine and insulting Max by telling him he looked like Noel Edmunds

[nsd_user663_60348]

I really was a bad mood looking for a reason

My OH said that it was as if I was looking for an arguement! He told me to argue with the driver of the late bus etc lol

When I first saw my old post that Karri posted, I did sort of sit back and think Whoaaaa...is that what it is OMG...but you know when your just not sure!?

Im tired...and this fight is taking alot out of me at the moment..

I found this.....it made me smile.....

[nsd_user663_59642]

I'm sorry you are a bit down in the dumps right now, Magicmom. All I can come up with is:

1) Be really kind to yourself, because you are feeling bruised and battered. Could you maybe buy yourself some nice treats?

2) Keep reminding yourself of how much you have achieved......you should be feeling really proud of yourself .....you're in Month 3! Could you have even imagined that, a few months ago?

Christmas decorations going up here this weekend. No dodgy reindeer though. :eek:

Val

xxx

[nsd_user663_53649]

Magicmum, tell your husband you want an outside tree, because you deserve it and your worth it, and he can go for a long walk over a short pier if he thinks otherwise...... :D.

You are doing very well, get through today and a day like today won't bug you again.

On the Christmas decorations, I bought loads of tat today, and still need to get some outside lights, ( pup ate the wire for them last year) . Husband will have to be nagged into putting them up, and boy will he be sorry this year if he gives me any hastle over it, I am in fighting form.:cool: