aaaaaaaaaaaaargh!

Ok day four, I have been telling myself I was doing very well for the last few days no huge major melt downs, no massive craves that I couldn't think through, ( or eat through) .

This evening however holy hell, I have been hit by so many different craves coming from so many different angles. I twice had that sneaky idea your doing great just have a smoke now to SETTLE yourself and you can just pick up where you left off.

This is my own brain sabotaging me, now if you were in my kitchen and heard me fighting with myself you would call the men in the white coats.

Now the constant craves have developed into feeling irritated. My husband god love him had a few pints after work, and he is all jolly and is being funny while he isn't actually funny if you know what I mean. I so want to either strangle him or smoke. I hope he remains safe tonight, I also hope I can get through this weekend, not only that but to top it all I feel FAT, and I keep snaking on rubbish. ( I know carrot sticks etc, but I hate carrot sticks and healthy foods, I feel punished enough without those things)

Ok biddy, rant over, keep smiling, breathe, and don't smoke.

10 Replies

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  • A few days ago I got annoyed with the way my other half was blinking. He was blinking normally but for some reason it really wound me up (along with him occidentally slurping his coffee which he got a stern telling off for)

    Hope your husband survives the night....maybe there should be a support group for partners/husbands/wives of quitters ;)

  • A few days ago I got annoyed with the way my other half was blinking. He was blinking normally but for some reason it really wound me up (along with him occidentally slurping his coffee which he got a stern telling off for)

    Hope your husband survives the night....maybe there should be a support group for partners/husbands/wives of quitters ;)

    Yeah I agree I think we need to create a room for them, my poor hubby just had to put up with an hr of me crying on his shoulder lol!, bless him!

    Hope tomorrow is a better day for you biddypat , I'm experiencing the 'feeling fat' issue too but one moutain at a time!!

  • Well he is alive and breathing. I managed to get through the night smoke free, and even better I was at my friends birthday party last night, ( I was trying to find an excuse not to go ) I had a few drinks, danced lots, and when my friends went out to smoke I stayed inside chatting to others, It was easy, I also woke up this morning not half as hungover as other nights out, my mouth didn't feel like a badger had slept in it during the night, and I had no major craving for a smoke, Happy out today, I know I am not out of the woods, but I feel like a baseball player I am batting those craves out of the field, and I am recognising the triggers and thinking aha, well that won't trigger again because nope I won't smoke and I won't be miserable without it either.

  • Well he is alive and breathing. I managed to get through the night smoke free, and even better I was at my friends birthday party last night, ( I was trying to find an excuse not to go ) I had a few drinks, danced lots, and when my friends went out to smoke I stayed inside chatting to others, It was easy, I also woke up this morning not half as hungover as other nights out, my mouth didn't feel like a badger had slept in it during the night, and I had no major craving for a smoke, Happy out today, I know I am not out of the woods, but I feel like a baseball player I am batting those craves out of the field, and I am recognising the triggers and thinking aha, well that won't trigger again because nope I won't smoke and I won't be miserable without it either.

    Well done for batting away those triggers Biddy....That is how it's done! Keep it going and you will soon be thinking of them less and less and your hubby will be safe again.xx:)

  • You are doing so well Biddypat :)

    hope it stays like that.... :eek:, I remember most of it from the last quit, and I also know how easy it is to get back into the whole smoking thing.

  • hope it stays like that.... :eek:, I remember most of it from the last quit, and I also know how easy it is to get back into the whole smoking thing.

    As easy as it is to say it, try not to dwell on the whole "going back" thing, the more you think about it the more likely you are to romanticise about the highs and forget about the lows. Quitting is so similar to leaving an abusive ex, turn your back and keep walking for a brighter, healthier future, go back and you will suffer more physical and emotional pain. Keep your chin up and focus on the highs of quitting - good luck

  • Thanks Karrie, that is true it was a very low ebb in my life, and I wasn't long enough into my quit I think. I am off to town today now to buy a new set of denby dishes, that I wanted but thought were too dear, but as I would have burned that money in the last week I am going to buy the set of dishes. ( I have to buy two boxes of them as I need 8 of everything)

  • Hmmm I actually bought some and stared at the packet last Thursday night for nearly 4 hrs. The little Nico monster kept saying come on, come on light me up!!!

    I resisted well and truly and in my eyes proved myself. Stay strong, everyone's feeling the same pressure I reckon.

    We can all do this:eek:

    B.loody hell that's some willpower Craig!!

  • So you should be!!

  • WELL DONE CRAIG. I had my pack of 19 left in a box in my sitting room, on Saturday I took them out and burned them with the pile of leaves I was burning, I thought why bother keeping them, now I have to actually travel if a crave comes bad, and sure by then I will have myself talked out of it.

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