Well I've made it to day 6 and I'm still going strong.
In the past 6 days since I quit I have seen my horrible smoker's cough disappearing before my eyes, my energy levels improving daily and I have to say that I am feeling better than I have done for ages. I have always been lucky to have enjoyed reasonably good health but over the last few months smoking has been beginning to take it's toll on me.
My wheezing, shortage of breath and dreadful cough were starting to scare me and I knew that all of this was probably as a result of my smoking habit. The improvement in my health since quitting is all the proof I need to convince me that I must never smoke another cigarette.
I sailed through the first 4 days of my quit convinced that I would never ever think of poisoning my body with cigarette toxins ever again and I felt more confident than ever that this was indeed my time to quit.
Well, I still feel like that but I just hope that the improvement in my health won't lull me into a false feeling of security. I still NEVER want to smoke again, I'm not having any cravings as such BUT there have been a couple of times when I've thought that a cigarette would be nice, even that just one wouldn't hurt. I just can't believe it, especially after how I scared myself into quitting, and with very good cause!!
These were just very tempting fleeting thoughts that I was able to resist but they have really put me on my guard and shaken my confidence quite a bit.
The last thing I want to do is to continue to be a slave to nicotine any more. Yes, I did used to 'enjoy' smoking or perhaps I only thought that I did. I'm not sure now that it wasn't just that I'd become so addicted to smoking that I did it without really thinking. I feel as if it had become something I did at certain times, and in certain situations, as if on autopilot.
I'm not going to let myself down again, I know I'm not weak.
Right now I'm feeling fine, no signs of weakness at all but I'm going to be on my guard from now on. I would have thought that my bad chest was warning enough to make me forget about smoking altogether but I must be more addicted (or stupid) than I thought.
I know that 99% of the time I am fine and enjoying the fact that I'm not smoking any more. Now I just have to make sure that I don't give in to any little moments of temptation that are still lurking in the shadows.
This is my time though, no more smoking for me.