It has been 7 days since I last had a real cigarette. Yes, I'm cheating. I'm using an electronic cigarette. I just couldn't quite manage an absolute quit. I've been off work due to work related stress, a serious allegation was made against me which has proved unfounded but left me devastated. The whole situation was handled badly and I go back to work tomorrow. I'm a dithering wreck because there are a lot of questions unanswered and quite frankly I believe I've been treated very badly.
So perhaps trying to quit at such a stressful time was perhaps a bit too optimistic. However, due to being sick of the breathlessness and all the other physical things that came with being a smoker I had to do something. I opted for the e-cigarette to help me and whilst it does contain nicotine, I see the only difference from other forms of NRT is that I put it to my mouth and inhale....hmmm thinking about other forms, maybe it isn't that different.
I'm happy to say I probably don't use it as much as I used the real thing and I am already beginning to feel better. Less breathless, no coughing during telephone conversations, much more active, and the house smells lovely. I smell lovely. It isn't all hunky dory. Today has been difficult because my anxiety levels are high. I've been very close to going out and buying the real thing because let's face it, I've not only been addicted to the nicotine but all the carcinogenic chemicals as well. An e-cigarette is definitely NOT a real cigarette and my cravings for the real thing have had me gritting my teeth today.
I am pleased though. A whole 7 days without the real thing. It's a step forward and a step closer to eventually letting go. It's my way and I'm okay with that