Why?

Hi, I just need to vent a few of my feelings, it's been a while since I've been on here as I did not think it was fair on others if I was still smoking an coming on to the forum.

For a few years now I've tried to quit as many of you know sometimes lasting several months but then something just clicks in my head and no matter what I have to have a cigarette. Each time just as I thought things was getting easier, bang I was back on them again.

I would much rather not smoke for obvious reasons like health and money but I just don't know if I can do it, is it that I don't want it enough? I don't know what the answer is. I've read, read and read and know what it does and what a terrible drug nicotine is but yet I still reside to the fact that I am a smoker, would I do that for any other drug...

I have tired virtually every NRT replacement product, champix, hypnotherapy, bioresenance, everything and spent a lot of money on trying to quit (although not as much on actually smoking).

I just do not know what I should do, I was thinking of trying the champix route again or do I want to put myself through all that again only to come back a few months down the line saying once again I had failed.

I see others reaching milestones like 1 year plus and I think gees I wish that was me then all of a sudden I get frightened and don't want it to be me as I'm scared of facing life without a smoke.

I know no one can answer my question for me, it's just that I'm trying to make sense of it all.

Thank for listening

Tinks xx

9 Replies

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  • Hi Tinkerbell

    I quit for 3 years 6 years ago (stupidly started again...divorce!)

    Last year I tried Champix and lasted 3 weeks.

    This is my 4th attempt this year...and it feels different. I feel like did when I started the 3 year quit..I'm very determined and just can't mess about any more.

    I know that feeling that "you ARE a smoker", thats what I felt like. (probably we all do on this forum!) I liked smoking, but it didn't like me. My health was definitely and obviously being affected.

    I think the more attempts you make, the easier it gets. You know what to expect (sort of!!) And maybe the non-smoking pathways are still there?

    But you have to have the motivation and maybe at moment you don't have it.

    That's ok. The right time will come along and it will all fall into place.

    LizzieX (day 21 smokefree, on Champix and this forum!)

  • Absolutely outstanding seeing you treading the boards again, Tinks *or whatever your name is :p*

    I kinda like Elizabeth's comment below:

    I liked smoking, but it didn't like me.

    I too liked smoking and most of us TBH were probably exactly the same :o

    But then it didn't like me/you/us...and no wonder, it's a poison :eek: Then there's a wee spin to looking at that, a different perspective...it's not that it didn't like me/you/us...more that our bodies don't like it. We aren't supposed to take poisons. We, like everything else on this planet, are supposed to work towards the survival of our species...not kill off humanity in the process of enjoying smoking.

    Sorry but that's probably a derailment of sorts :o

    Get back onto a quit, Tinks!!

    Cav

    Note to Mods: the small font comment above is a private joke between Tinks and I

  • I agree with ELisabeth Tinkerbell....I've attempted to quit before using patches, inhalator, gum, hypnosis...but all failed.

    This time I scared myself shitless as my health has been affected due to smoking, for me I just can't jeopardise my time on earth with my family...therefore there is no choice really, stop smoking or die early.

    You will get that intense feeling to quit (I must admit it's a different quitting feeling to any I've had before). You just have to get so pissed off and fed up with smoking that you just quit in the end.

    Good luck

    Lisa

    XXXXX

  • T'is you, you Tink ;)

    So many times this month (October) I've thought about you. Nearly got to emailing you this weekend too.

    As Cav (or whatever his name ;)) points out ... great to see you here again.

    All the best in getting a good firm foot along this quit journey :cool:

    How is your foot by the way? :p

    Pol xx

  • P.S. The last time I tried to give up was about the same time as one of your quits, October/November 2009, I caved in at 3 weeks....and only now decided to quit again 2 years later. Never give up on giving up Tinks. You can do it....you obviously want to...or you wouldn't be bothered posting on here and spending the amount of money you have on quitting. XXXXx

  • Hi Tinks

    Well you obviously want to stop, given the number of attempts that you have made in the past.....

    Before I stopped earlier this year, my previous quit was six years ago. On that occassion, I had just been diagnosed with asthma for the first time in my life, and my doctor was getting very worried about the frequent bouts of bronchitis that I was experiencing. He put the fear of god in me and I quit for over a year. Started smoking :(, and the fear of going through the discomfort of withdrawals again put me off any further attempts. So now I have had six more years of damage to my system, and only tried again this time when the realistic fear of a premature death finally outweighed the withdrawal fears. Three months later, I still can't get over how stupid I was to think like this.

    But, on the upside, Champix has been a miracle drug for me. Quitting has been entirely bearable - much easier than my previous attempts.

    So, my question to you is - just how long do you want to wait?

  • Hi Tinks

    Long time no speak, but was pleased to see you are still on the forum.

    I can only answer your question as I personally see it, giving up Nicotine was the hardest thing I have ever done, as my fellow quitters new I hated giving up, but had to, thats not easy either as I resented that terribly. But as I personally see it, there is only one way to give up and thats the hard way, for you, and only for you, you have to really want to give up and make the decision that you are never having another fag.

    Thats what I told myself, never again could I smoke, and I think that could be the difference, you may be saying to yourself that "if it doesnt work I can always have another go". I hope I am wrong Tinks, I really want you to succeed,believe me I want everyone who smokes to give this evil habit up, as Cav says it really is a poison.

    I hope this helps a tiny bit, its lovely to see you again, and never feel you cant ask any of us for some help, but as Una said if you read my early posts I really went through hell as well.

    Take care and really wish you good luck.

    Dee xxx:)

  • Hello Tinks,

    you an me here again!!!

    I am quitting for the last time now, I have a positive feeling about it and using Tabex tablets from bulgaria.

    i know you can do it and you know you can do it, you just need the nasty Nicotine monster to stop clouding the part of your mind that knows you are to quit!!

    You will get there, we will get there :) That penthouse is waiting for us so come on Tinks YOU CAN DO IT!!!

    Woo x

  • Thank you all for your lovely replies and words of wisdom :)

    Lovely Dee, you are absolutely correct I do think 'I can give it another go' that never dawned on me before perhaps that is why I keep failing.

    Me old mate Cav, I never thought of it like that, 'not supposed to like poisions' because it's legal I guess we think it's OK. It's a relief to be back (if that makes sense), I was a bit tenative about posting TBH!

    Auntie Pol, thank you for thinking about me, foot is healed now, what I plonker I was there.

    Shashwoo, gees, tablets from Bulgaria, are you sure they are to help you quit smoking? You havn't started growing a beard or anything lol :D

    Mrs T, Lisa 42 & una-g, I don't think we have 'met' before but thank you for your replies and advice and I wish you all the luck with your quits, but hey who needs luck, you'll do it, you seem to be very determined :)

    Elizabeth64, I may go down the champix route again due to the fact you said you tried it before with little success but this time around you have found it OK?

    Someone asked how long do I want to wait? Well I am ringing my doctors today, that's a step in the right direction, right?

    To all my old friends on here, I just wanted to say I'm sorry I've not been around nor emailed, I've had a bit of a horrid year well actually a lot of a horrid year and had to get things sorted, I hope that makes sense to you.

    Tinks :)

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