Hello everyone, found this forum via Google and have been reading it over the weekend just to remind myself other people have done and are doing what I'm doing now, so it's far from impossible.
I smoked for 14 years with 2 prior quit attempts lasting a week and a slightly more successful 3 months. It took 40 months from the last quit attempt for me to give up for good this time.
Last time I used champix, which did the trick but I spent 3 months in the darkest moods I've ever experienced, which didn't seem to help me too much when I was coming off of them.
On Thursday the 1st of June at 11.15pm I finished my last ever cigarette. It wasn't as nice as I hoped, so the final memory is a little bit sullied. Since then I've been clinging to my rather nifty looking Nicorette quickmist spray thingy like it was an extra limb.
It seems to be working, also I'm using it a lot less than I thought, if each time I used it was a smoke I'd be down from 20 a day to 10-15.
Thanks to the spray I'm not getting too much physical withdrawal, right now it's all very much a battle going on in my head. I'm not that strong willed it turns out, which has thwarted me in the past.
I consider myself a clever bloke, but the less clever part of my brain keeps shouting out, 'If you're missing it, have one!' The clever part unfortunately is quite easily lead and also a bit of a tart. When the stupid part keeps offering up such a seductive statement he is tempted to bend over and go with it.
So that's where I'm at right now. In my head the yearning to go back to my old routine has somehow become a smutty story. Tomorrow I've got to go to work and try and keep the more clever part of my brain on the straight and narrow.
It's going to be dead easy to pop into Spar, The shop at the train station, the dodgy little shop by work that looks like the shop in Shameless or even the really overpriced garage and pick up 10 fags. It won't as easy to walk on by, not pop in and keep listening to my iPod and keep an eye out for muggers whilst telling myself I really can do it.
I know why I'm doing this, I know who I'm doing it for but right now I need to keep reminding myself of all of this. Days 1 to 4 have been rough, I'm not doing them again.