Day 2 is killing me!!!!!!!!!

Hi everyone, I justy found this forum while trying to occupy my mind on day two and it's kept me on track for the last hour :)

Ive been a 20+ a day smoker for the last 21years. I did quit during my first pregnancy 18yrs ago, went cold turkey and found it really easy but stupidly started again when baby was born. I've tried on numerous occasions to stop again and failed despite two further pregnancies and dozens of attempts with gum, patches, tablets ect. My will power seems to be great for the first couple of hours then it dips to 0 and i cave in.

So, today being day 2 is an achievement in itself! I'm using patches (24hr) and quitting with my hubby and 16yr old son. They both found yesterday very hard and caved in (just one fag each) but i found yesterday incredibly easy until 8.30 pm and i could have quite cheerfully murdered someone just for a drag so i went to bed hoping that today would be easier....

Its not! it's harder and its killing me! Every thought seems to be about cigs! I found this forum and every post seems to be saying "it's ok to cave in and re-start, its acceptable because everyone does it" my rational side knows this is not what the posts say but the ciggy monster in me is reading them this way and its getting harder and harder to resist! I think i'm probably just tired and hungry...

I put my first patch on before bed on Sunday night so that it had kicked in to beat the morning cravings and hardly slept, i also hardly slept last night and im hungry but i cant eat properly - partly cos i'm worried that if i have a proper meal i'll not be able to fight the urge to have a fag after (so im nibbling a mixtrure of healthy and unhealthy snacks) but everything tastes so nasty! I remember food and drink tasting awful when i stopped smoking during pregnancy but just assumed it was a hormonal thing - it wasnt! I was really looking forward to enjoying food and now i'm wondering if i even really like food!

Advice would be much appreciated :)

12 Replies

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  • Hi Tamwill & welcome :)

    I always tell myself on day 2 that I am so close to getting through the first hard 3 days that it is not too much longer to hang on for which keeps me going. Lots of slow, deep breaths & sipping cold water also got me through.

    I think everyone who uses the patches suffer with broken sleep & dreams although I suffered worse than ever on my last quit & was only using lozenges. When I used patches in the past I used to take it off in the evening then slap it on on waking in the morning.

    The posts you mentioned are just supportive, don't beat yourself up, get back on it when you can replies. I think that old demon IS trying to tell you otherwise though :eek: What matters is we just keep trying (I do a LOT of this lol).

    Keep strong, read & post. There is always someone round to listen :)

    Gaynor xx

  • Hi and welcome to the site

    Well done on getting to day 2.

    It is going to be hard for a while. You are stopping doing something you have done for a long time, so yes, it is hard but NOT impossible. You can do it. If you really want it, you can do it.

    As you say, the posts saying its ok to cave and try again is your nicomonster trying to get you to cave. Only you can decide if it is ok to do that. Is it ok that with that 1 cigarette, that 1 smoke comes with the other 8000 you will smoke in the next year? Only you can decide if that is OK for you.

    Have a look at the link in my signature 'choose your pain' It struck a real chord with me and may with you. Today I choose the pain of change. Whats your choice??

    Best tip I can give you is read read read, it is said alot on this site, and for good reason, it works.

    Stay strong, someone will be here if you need them

    Sian

  • I'm with Gaynor and Sian here. Read, read, read. Post as and when you need/want to.

    I never ever thought I would be able to quit but I read so much and learnt so much and saw so much that although I still have the odd crave and a few :p mental moments, I would never, ever happily smoke again, if I ever smoke at all.

    I read so much I did a number on myself, brainwashed myself.

    But that was because I wanted it really, really badly. I hated cigarettes by the time I quit and loathed every fag and myself. It has to be something you really want. Maybe pop along to 'Your Reasons' section and have a think.

    What also helps me is (maybe someone can help me out) there is an article, I think it's on whyquit, where they are asking Which Is The One??

    Which is the cigarette that'll give you lung cancer, or a stroke, an embolism, a heart attack? If it's the next fag, will you smoke it? Can you be sure it isn't?

    Read - tons. There will be links on people signatures (I stole mine from others). But even now I come across something someone linked and it makes me think or affirm my quit.

    And regarding the 'It's o.k. to cave'. It's not, but if you beat up on someone do you think they'll come back?? Also, I've never seen a wagon accident where the person is saying 'Yay, I caved!' Those that cave are beating themselves more than we could ever do. Also, people have to quit because they want to, not because they are being bullied or berrated.

    Good luck with this. If you are convinced on the patches then remember you can also use the inhalator during bad times. Oh....and sleep disturbance seems to happen no matter what. In my experience with patches I had nightmares and with champix a touch of insomnia and the weirdest, freakiest dreams I've ever had.

    Didn't know I had it in me :cool::D

    Edit to add, maybe book a trip to dentist, that taste issue could be a dental problem :)

  • Which is the cigarette that'll give you lung cancer, or a stroke, an embolism, a heart attack? If it's the next fag, will you smoke it? Can you be sure it isn't?

    I like this thought. Well I don't -- but it's quite motivational.

    Good luck, if you get through these few days the worst physical symptoms are over.

    Also, positive thinking is going to help a LOT - You won't be back on day 1 if you really don't want to!

    Good luck xx

  • Thanks you guys! I've been reading and reading and more reading to keep me occupied and i now feel a bit more in control again. Wish i'd read more before the quit to arm myself with what to expect rather than things jumping on me unexpectedly but its too late now. And i have no intention of starting again just so i can read some stuff to help me when i stop again!lol!

    I think i could really do with a new hobby or something as my life is relatively stale and i KNOW a lot of my fags were boredom......

    I've just counted up and its now nearly 41 hours since i last had a cig! Counting it as hours rather than days makes me feel like i've been doing it for ages and seems way to far to come to go back now!;):D:D

    Oh and just to add.... I had failed with patches years ago so begged the nurse to give me the strongest ones to try and eradicate the worst of the cravings - she did but advised i didnt use any other NRT products as i could overdose. I've got one of those electronic ciggies that (supposedly) give you a nicotine hit... It helped me cut down a bit (from 30 a day to 16 a day) before the quit but i was never convinced it actually did anything other than replace the hand to mouth action. i may give that a go if i get really desperate but i think for now i'm back in control again.

  • Hiya, when I quit using patches I was on stage one and was told that I could use the inhalator when the cravings broke through. Ask whoever you are getting the patches from, I think the advice has changed.

    Obvioulsy you don't use it as if you were on the inhalator alone, it's for when the cravings break through the patch if you like.

    Although maybe you are on a mega patch or something :D is it the size of a duvet and you're wrapped up in it??

    Obviously follow their advice...they're the professionals, we hope.

  • Although maybe you are on a mega patch or something :D is it the size of a duvet and you're wrapped up in it??

    Haha! Yeah its double duvet sized! :D

    Its the 21mg nicotinell (are we allowed to use brand names?) step 1 for smokers of 20+ a day but i was only smoking a max of 15 a day cos i'd lowered myself from 30 before starting the patches. if i hadnt insisted the nurse would have only prescribed step 2 :eek: and she said i could have had added other NRT products to that.... The nurses at my GP surgery are a bit crap so might be as well to go talk to the chemist and see what advice they have. I'm using normal gum and strong mints and they seem to help cos i wouldnt eat a mint then have a cig and in the past i have used mints to freshen my breath after a cig so i can kinda fool myself i've just had one ;)

  • Hi Tam,

    I can't really add much to the great advice above. Reading, self education, and as someone termed it 'mental realignment' is the key. Replacement therapies help at the start, but it's winning the mental battle that will make this a successful quit.

    You're just at the beginning and nobody's going to pretend to you that it's a bed of roses, but a lot of us here are living proof that it doesn't last, and you KNOW you're better than this stupid addiction.

    Hang in there, stay strong.

    Helen

    PS - the 'it's OK to cave' thing you're reading into those posts is your inner junkie talking. If you do a lot of reading you'll soon be introduced to them. Once you recognise their voice, it's a lot easier to tell them to sod off. :D

  • Tamwill- speaking from experience I caved in September thinking one would be ok. Here I am 5 months latter still on day one. It really never is any easier tomorrow as I have found out

    Remain strong. About the only thing I can think of worse than going through day 2 is doing day 1 and 2 again. You can do this

  • Hey Tamwill, well done for Day 2 and welcome to the forum. Most of us here are living proof that it does get better. I'm on 4 weeks today and I never, ever thought I'd get this far. It's just one day at a time and the mental willpower to get through the day after. I've realised it really is 99% in the mind. To me it was just getting my head space right and sticking with it. Having said that .... it's one day at a time :) All the best with your quit, if you want it you'll get it.

  • Which is the cigarette that'll give you lung cancer, or a stroke, an embolism, a heart attack? If it's the next fag, will you smoke it? Can you be sure it isn't?

    I remember reading that in the Allen Carr book ...

  • .

    Which is the cigarette that'll give you lung cancer, or a stroke, an embolism, a heart attack? If it's the next fag, will you smoke it? Can you be sure it isn't?

    I remember reading that in the Allen Carr book ...

    This is also said on Paul McKenna's Stop Smoking CD Set and it really does make you think....

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