I've been thinking what to write in my one year post for a while now - everyone else's seem so epic and poignant! I still have no idea what to put, so I'll just start typing and see what I come up with.
Exactly a year ago - almost to the exact moment (it was 12.20am on the 11th of October 2009), I smoked my last cigarette. I'd first tried to quit back in March 2007 and lasted all of 3 weeks, then again on 9th September 2009 when I lasted all of 24 hours cold turkey before I was climbing the walls (well, more like crawling along the floor to the shop and demanding cigarettes!)
This time I was determined - the Allen Carr method hadn't worked, so I decided to do it MY WAY (as Frank Sinatra and Sid Vicious did).... and be completely cheesy about it!
So having stocked up on patches (max strength 24hr ones just in case) at 12:20am on 11/10/09, I lit up my last fag EVER and smoked it whilst listening to THIS :
Then I slapped on my first patch and went to bed. I think that helped as I wasn't craving too much in the morning as it was like I'd been smoking in my sleep all night, something I'd never actually worked out how to do before!
It wasn't plain sailing at all, notable moments in my quit include the following......
I awoke in the early hours feeling strangely wet. It turned out a certain cat had snuck upstairs and peed all over the bed. I ended up calling in sick to work, cos I didn't know when else to wash the bedding and I was stressed (shhh don't tell the boss!). Being at home on my own was the worst - I was craving more than ever and going nearly crazy (I think my day 4 was like the fabled day 3 that most people get!)> I ended up phoning MadCatMan and getting him to pick up an inhalator for me on his way home, and that helped a lot!
Another nightmare one - I was at work this time, I have no idea just what stopped me going to buy a pack of fags on my lunchbreak (emails from MadCatMan helped to motivate me!)
No other particular days stand out, but I suspect I was a complete bitch for the first 3 months, and I couldn't stop myself from being a bitch. I stopped coming here so much too just in case lol! The dreams certainly stood out though, that's the only part I miss about the first bit of my quit! (ooooo the dreams.... )
I gave up the patches and inhalator round about Christmas time - and it seemed to coincide with me stopping being a bitch, and just being completely and utterly miserable. Several times I actually considered smoking again to see if it would cheer me up and drag me out of the hole I was in - but each time I quickly realised it would probably make me even MORE miserable.... so I didn't!
My turning point came at around 6 months - I don't know if the weather getting better helped, but I actually started feeling happier and more positive - and less like I wanted a fag! Gradually I started to feel like ME again (a slightly heavier version anyway!).
It's only been getting better since - I still get cravings yes, but nothing like the ones at first that writing this takes me back to. The main thing that's stopped me slipping is that I NEVER EVER want to go through that again!!
I have made cakes to take into work tomorrow as half celebration and half apology for any times I was a miserable cow in the last year!
Now for the thanks part......
MadCatMan has been my absolute ROCK throughout, and he's still here even though I was a bitch, then a miserable bitch, then just miserable.
The cats have been great too - apart from Blackie, who I'm sure sneaks down to the cellar for a crafty smoke every now and again.
Most of all, my fellow quitters of the month, the fabulous OCTOQUITS who were all going through similar things at similar times, made me laugh, made me blub - and always helped keep the wine flowing in our swap over from nicotine addicts to alcohol addicts! If I'd smoked, I wouldn't just have been letting myself down, it would've been like letting us ALL down.
*cracking open a beer*
Shove over you penthouse lot and make room for my slightly larger than it used to be butt.........
It's time to PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now where's those boingy kittens?
Everyone feel free to post party songs!