Well as the title says i have started smoking again, i stoped with the help of champix in febuary and they worked amazing.
This time i thought i really had stopped for good i felt i had really turned a corner.
However since stopping the mood swings i experinced were horrible they didnt start at first.
But as soon as i started to reduce the champix my moods changed.
I am by nature abit of a stress head but this was to a whole new level i became very irratated at the smallest things.
And would blow up over nothing, i have had tantrums and just burst out crying.
I have argued alot with my partner, which has put strain on our relationship and even friends and family have been quite snappy and upset them.
On 3 different occasions while in the middle of one of my explosions i have bought i packet of fags.
Each time i have smoked 2 or 3 which were totally horrible and than ripped up the packet.
However last saturday after a day of feeling a right moody cow i thought sod it im having a fag.
Well this time i didnt just have one or two and since have bought 10 every day saying tomorrow i will stop.
So basically i am back to square one, i know it wont take long for me to be back up to 30 aday if i dont stop.
As i have done this before stopped for 6 months then started again and within days smoking more than before.
So i know i need and want to stop but the cravings are bad again i really tried not smoking today but again i have failed. I bought 10 at lunch and i have smoked them but i am not going to shop again for another packet.
What really gets to me is why i think i can just have one and then stop when i havent be able to before.
I am thinking about going back to see my gp next day or so and see if i could try champix again but i am not sure whether i will get it a second time.
Also i really dont know what to do about my mood swings ?
They were getting that bad i thought i might as well smoke if i have to live like this and no thats not an excuse to smoke just explaining how bad i felt with them.I thought at this rate i might not be smoking but people do not want to be around me.
Anyway i am feeling abit sorry for myself so will go now but if anyone could offer any advice that would be great.