Day 2 - oh dear

Day 2 - not stopped crying all morning, am in work with red eyes and no smile today. For the second night running I have had very little sleep and spent most of my time tossing and turning.

BUT its Day 2 - yey.

Dont get me wrong, I know that giving up is the best thing for me thats why I am giving up BUT it does feel like I am grieving at the minute. Agree or disagree but thats how I feel. Cigarettes were my best friend for 25 years, they stuck with me through the good times and got me through many many bad times (thats a different story for another day) and now they are gone for good and I wont ever see them again (yes I know your all shouting at me now that its a good thing - I know) think thats why I am so down today.

OH is doing really well so much better than me - he was the one that was calming me down last night when I was getting short with the kids he is the one encouraging me all the time. He says that maybe its the calm before the storm, but I just think he is so much better at this than I am.

Oh dear crying again. Might ring the doctor in a bit and see whether he can give me a prescription rather than me using the patches, maybe thats whats making me stay awake at night cos when I am dreaming its like I am conscious and weird so so weird.

Well nearly 9.00 lets see what the work day brings.

6 Replies

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  • Ok, your havin one of those days are you:eek:

    During my last quit i think i spent the first week in tears, and the second week thinking about crying. I am so sorry your feeling bad, lack of sleep will make you feel worse as well.

    I can't comment on the patches thing, but i am sure there will be plenty along who can.

    I am afraid to say you just have to get through this bit, not easy i know but completly do able.

    Your OH is neither better nor worse than you at this we all do it differently and each quit i have done has been different from the last (this one is different because it is my last:D)

    Here is load of PMA and a huge HUG ((((((((((((((((())))))))))))))))

    Keep going you can do it.

  • I hope you get through it.

    In my experience if I feel like this in the first couple of days (such as last week) then it means I wasnt ready to quit. Im on day two now, after some serious menatl attitude tuning this last week, and I havent had a single craving yet, after 36 hours.

    Good luck, try and get your head around it.

  • hey youunme,

    it is a very strange feeling at first when you go from being a heavy smoker to nothing over night. It is like any big change, it seems to be all consuming to begin with then you get more used to it as the days pass.

    25 years is a long long time as well, it will take some reajustment to get your head right but you are already 2 days into that readjustment and your doing great. Your doing the only thing you need to do in all of this thing. Not smoke.

    congratulations on deciding to do the best thing you can every do for yourself and your loved ones.

    stay strong and post often,

    Bman

  • Hi Younme :)

    Well done on day 2 you're doing fine just hang in there

    Being emotional/crying is normal for most of us quitters this early in a quit as is the feeling of grief after all for most of us our lives revolved around fags

    Every thing we did was planned around them and when we could manage the get the next fix

    The disturbed sleep is also normal just now but many on patches take them off at night after all did you smoke when asleep ?? just try it for a night or two it may well help the sleeping

    Love

    Marg

  • Thanks everyone for your kind words and support.

    I know that most of my crying is due to tiredness and I thought I could get a good early night tonight but just been informed that we are all going out tonight for a family members birthday which we totally forgot about - so another test for me but as long as I dont drink I think I will be o.k. OR I could get very drunk and that will make me sleep lol.

    After food is not too bad at the minute as long as I do something else - like type a big long email to my friends then I dont have time to have a cig and carry on with my work.

    OH is being amazing, very patient with me and is doing really really well he has no agression or anything, he says that he does want one but is looking forward and thats getting him through.

    I think my problem is that I am constantly thinking about it and I cant stop myself I have tried to throw myself into my work but the problem is I am racing through it then find I have nothing else to do for the rest of the day.

    Was thinking about taking the patch off at night but my favourite cig was as soon as my alarm went off and before I opened my eyes! so a little worried that I might start the day off badly.

    But as down, upset and as weepy as I am I am not going to give up giving up.

  • If it was me, i would remove my patch before i slept to get rid of the 'dreams' . (it was the bad and lucid dreams that brought me to these forums after googling 'nicotine patches bad dreams' or something i think), i would keep the next patch by your bed and opened, or at least have scissors in the room so you didn't run around looking for something to open the patch outer foil with in the morning. I am presuming that there is no cigs in the house, so the patch is the nearest relief to hand after an 8 hour stretch while asleep anyway.

    Once awake slap that patch on, an once its on, breath in deeply and let a nice big sigh out.. you've started another day, and the patch is there to keep you sane again.

    If you can cope with the dreams then leave the patch on, but i found the lack of sleep was the biggest most disruptive thing during my early weeks quitting .. it was more disruptive than cravings.

    Another possible solution? cut the early patches clean in half, and put two halves on.. and before you go to bed? remove half only? this way you halve the nighttime dosage while you sleep? might make a difference.. or the dreams less intense.

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