Newbie needs help!

Hi everyone, I'm Lindsay. I've just failed to quit smoking for about the millionth time. 3 days this time. Have tried NRT and CT and read Allan Carr's book and watched the DVD. I'm desparate to quit. I'm on incapacity benefit as I have CFS and the frequently have to choose between buying food or fags due to lack of funds. You guessed it, smoking always wins. I hate it. I just don't seem to be able to stop. My biggest problems are anger, exhaustion and weight. My food cravings aren't too bad but I'm terrified of putting on weight. I work really hard to keep my weight down as I lose all self-confidence if I put any on. My illness means excersise is difficult although I do manage to walk the dog most days. The extra tiredness I get when quitting means I end up lying down 23hrs out of every day which of course makes every hour seem like a day. I find this hard as I'm naturally an active person who hates watching TV. The anger is probably the thing I find hardest to deal with. I just can't seem to keep a lid on it and have even become physically violent. It's terrifying. I can't take Zyban or Champix. Can anyone offer any advice? I haven't tried any complimentary methods as my funds are limited, but I'd get a loan if I was convinced they really worked. Help! Thanks for reading - Lindsay x

5 Replies

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  • Linz,

    Like most things, quitting smoking seems to affect us all in different ways. Theres lots of common things like increased moodiness (angry), to impatience.. empty feeling, tiredness etc.. but the biggest thing you have to endure is mostly the cravings. again they hit us all in different ways.. and in different intensities.

    I note from your post that you've either tried most of the methods, or can't use some due to illness.. but of the ones you've tried, have you perhaps considered listing them all first.. along with how long they lasted, and what made you fail with them?

    Sometimes, we collect all these failed attempts together and worry that we'll never be able to quit.. when we can.. we all can.. but if you can get to the bottom of where you failed.. and learn from that.. and take some steps to limit or avoid similar circumstances again, could this not help you to try one of those methods again?

    Theres no magic wand as the final push to successfully quitting has to come from you really, but you can take the negatives you've experienced, and use them to re-enforce your current quit as we can learn from past mistakes if we see them for what they were.

    Re-reading the Allen Carr book and watching the DVD again can also help, and his methods do work quite nicely on removing the belief in the myths that the addiction has us believe. This is an addiction you are quitting, so to strengthen your mind and determination is key to success.. as is breaking the brainwashing that smoking has done over the years.

    J

  • Thank you, everything you said makes sense. My most recent attempt, which I thought was the most determined, was quitting cold turkey after watching Alan Carr's DVD. I always find it hard to examine exactly what goes wrong because by the time I start smoking again I'm so confused and desparate that I can't think straight. It feels like I'm someone else. I woke up on day 3, yesterday, feeling OK, cravings minimal. Like before, if I switched my brain off and just hid under the duvet I could keep control. The minute I had to actually function (got up to walk the dog) and turn my brain on a bit I just totally lost it. Can't even really remember what happened. I have a vague recollection of lashing out at the dog (missing her thankfully), screaming at my mother and then driving to the shop to buy ciggies. It's so hard because before and just after I stop I have a plan, I'm so determined and it all makes sense. I just seem to totally lose the plot! I was posting regularly on Facebook and getting lots of support from friends. I don't think Alan Carr is going to work for me because I already hate smoking, know it does nothing for me and desparately want to stop. That doesn't seem to help once I stop. My two previous attempts were using NRT gum and lozenges. The whole experience was very similar, only more dragged out.

  • Thanks Chrissie. I will look into acupuncture, I had no idea it was available anywhere on the NHS. I have spent most of the afternoon reading through the forum and the recommended links and found it helpful. The support is great, living alone can make it harder I think. I'm planning on having another go tomorrow, will go to the chemist for some NRT and try that again. Why does it have to be so AWFUL!?!

  • Hi Linz :)

    Linz I'm so sorry you lost your quit but well done for being so determied about it

    Below is my standard welcome and advice post which I try and give all new memebrs

    Welcome to the forum and well done on the decision to quit possibly one of the most important you will ever make and you will be losing nothing but you will regain control of your life and that has to be good

    You will find all the help and support you need on here as we all help each other just like a family we are here for you every step of the way cheering the good days and sympathiseing with the bad but the good far outweigh the bad

    Read the posts on here you will find a lot of tips and advice and in the signatures of a lot you will find links to other sites just click on them Here are 2 I find very good to start you off whyquit.com and woofmang.com Read, read and then read some more as the more you read and learn about why you smoked and about your addiction the easier your quit will be

    Post often to let us know how you're doing, to rant, rave have a moan whatever you like pretty much anything goes on here OK

    Love

    Marg

  • Id second that regarding the E Ciggerettes. I don't think I could have quit without them. We turn to our fag like a baby turns to a dummy :-)

    The anger symptoms, unfortunately, you will have to deal with them, but after 3 days, it gets better.

    Your'll also find that your tiredness will improve once you stop smoking poisons into your lungs, your'll feel more bright and alert, and able to get on with your life.

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