Suddenly terrified!

[nsd_user663_4910]

What an awful day! It may as well have been the day 2 of doom I so often dread during my numerous quit attempts!

Am leading up to my planned quit day, putting plans in place, getting in serious mindset, checking on here often and even feeling slightly jealous of the other day one'ers who were here when I joined motoring off ahead!

Made fatal error of not going on my usual gym jaunt after lunch today, that always makes me feel better but I was tired and a day at leisure at home appealed and seemed like such a luxury until...

I developed a sense of awful impending doom. The house feels like it's closing in and I feel trapped and suddenly angry for no sane reason. Started implementing some mind occupying tactics in preparation and although my mood isn't entirely to be blamed on smoking related 'issues' I'm finding myself darkly pondering when exactly I'll feel truly happy again....

[nsd_user663_3728]

Hi Gillie

Please don't be frightened there really is no need to be often the thought is worse than the doing if that makes sense

You've obviously been preparing for quitting by reading and getting the mindset right and that;s good as it will be a big help

I'm wondering if maybe it might be an idae to bring that stop date forward a few days instead of waiting until the 20th especially as you're feeling scared just now about it just an idea

Love

Marg xxxxxxxxxx

[nsd_user663_4910]

I did toy with the idea of bringing it forward I must admit as the misery of today and the misery during the quit process are really not so different!

I decided on the prep week as I used it prior to one of my longer quit bouts (I did it when I signed up with the nicorette scheme) and am someone who really needs to get my head around what I'm doing and has to put as many safety measures in place as possible. I'm facing a particularly stressful time at work at the weekend and didn't really want the two to coincide. My husband has time off work at the start of the week to help me through the first days and I have made plans to get out of the house as much as possible thereafter as I'm only a home smoker and ironically can get through long bouts of abstinence away from home without it bothering me at all.

I'm really really hoping that this will be it.

[nsd_user663_3728]

Hi Gillie

It was just an idea but you know the best thing for you after all

I can understand you not wanting to stop with a stressful weekend coming up

Love

Marg xxxxxxxx

[nsd_user663_4804]

Oh I hear you! I quit by saying "that's IT! tomorrow I quit!!" and there were a few tomrrows before I did ... about 3 or 4.

But I am finding that it's not as hard as i thought I would have been. This is not BS, it's true. I took the first few days an hour at a time. I did a lot of cycling and drank a lot of water. I also ate a lot of chocolate, but fruit juice can do the trick instead. Swearing loudly (in private) and punching pillows helped too. I had a plastic straw to suck on too, I still use it sometimes (I'm on week 5). I got curious about how my body would recover, how it would feel to not smoke after 8 hours, 24 hours etc. I spent a lot of time noticing the good things. All this helped.

When you do get your date just go for it, you're expecting the quit to be a big monster but it may just turn out to be a kitten

[nsd_user663_4754]

thats great that you can not smoke when you are out of the house. Looks like you need to take up walking / hiking or something that will keep you outdoors all day. or just go on holiday! LOL.

best of luck - i know what you mean about getting in the right mind set. I had it last time(or so i thought) and just cant quite get it again this time round. and its driving me nuts. i dont understand it.

best of luck

bman

[nsd_user663_4910]

Thank you all

My thanks to everyone for your words of support, I really feel that this time it will make a big difference for me. Bringing the problem out from secrecy and discussing it openly has been a real help in itself.

Smoking for me is most definately a psychological problem. Not so long ago, I had a day trip to a theme park and from leaving the house first thing in the morning to coming home in the early evening, I only smoked two cigarettes and as I had broken my public smoking rule (didn't think I could manage the whole day), I only had two, which I did not enjoy nor did I feel comfortable smoking them. I can honestly say that when I'm away from home it is predominantly (with few exceptions) as if I do not smoke at all.

Getting the mindset is key for me... I can sometimes do 8-12 hours smoke free depending on my head being in a good place. I do compare it to ending a relationship, the feeling of loss, trying to readjust to a new way of living without the crutch and support. I know it's illogical and stupid to depend on something so harmful but I'm moving forward to its elimination with the acceptance that it won't be easy and now it's a case of mustering up the strength to stay the course.