After months of vigilence and arriving at a comfortable and confident place i can honestly say i have CRACKED.
When i drink i have found a new way of smoking without buying cigarettes..
The antifag has found he can buy a cigar from the bar for 90p.
I have smoked a few on weekends when i drink and now have started buying singles from my local newsagent every couple of days and smoking with a bottle of wine.
I think i am at the stage where i can curb it but need a hell of a lot of mental strength as i find i no longer need to smoke during the day but fancy a smoke in the evening or when i'm drinking, i also find i can have a couple of drags of a cigar then let it go out and pick it up 30 mins later.
I need help!
People please help me, make me stop, i am starting to crave again and need to stop this NOW!
I need you guys BADLY.
One thing i have noticed... the cravings are a bitch, my heart has been erratic, i can actually feel it beating in my chest and a lot fatser then it has these past few months smoke free, my mentality has changed and i amallowing nicotine back in my life, i am afraid it will take a hold again and do not want it back in my life but it feels sooo good having a drag!!
all replies welcome and necessary!!!!!