Hi everyone and welcome all newcomers..
I know i've been a little quiet lately but I have been keeping up with all the latest posts most days - it's a bit like watching a soap only much better!
Really bad evening I just had to take myself out for a walk - all I want to do is cry and cry and I don't know why! (I haven't done that since I was seventeen).
Feel so low - I've got problems with my teeth which is, I suppose, what prompted the quit but apparently stress is bad for the condition (Genetic) but smoking's even worse! NHS are reluctant to offer any help and I can't afford the astronomical cost of private treatment - I'm still waiting to hear if I can get treatment at Sheffield on NHS. The trouble is I keep feeling really bad physically but I'm not sure how much is all in the mind - Do you know what I mean??
Anyway tonight I just had to go out for an hour - just wanted to be alone - and went to sit on the embankment where I thought I would be totally alone. Anyway this lad cycles past and I think no more of it. Five minutes later he comes back to see if I'm all right cos he thought I looked real sad. Obviously this just made me want to cry even more cos somebody I don't even know cares! Have you ever had your faith in human nature restored in such a way? Any way I still feel like a pile of pants but the urge to smoke has gone!
My biggest fear is the depression - I quit for seven weeks before but got so low I started again and I guess this is how I'm feeling now.
Just hope a good cry will make me feel better and hope my lovely hubby realises that my maniacal crying is nothing to do with him.
I'd better go to bed now cos I've got an early start - thanks for listening and if anyone can offer any advice it would be much appreciated.