Mentally struggling after a brain injury. I had my accident on Julyaar year and suffered a TBI. I'm now home from hospital

[Catx1978]

I'm struggling with the fact that I'm no longer the woman i was before the accident. I physically can't do the things I was able to do and mentally not able to cope with the same things. Did anyone else find this?

[KatetheBrain]

Hi CatX1978. I suffered a TBI four years ago after a fall, and also suffered a disfiguring facial injury.

I was devastated, especially since my job entails doing a lot of videos and teaching via ZOOM. And... my specialty is brain health. It was completely disheartening to struggle with words and planning events. And making decisions - wow - that was really hard!

But the thing that got me through was learning to do new things. It seemed that as I was doing them, it was like my brain was making new connections - new dendrites were being formed.

I also changed my diet completely. No refined sugar, at all, and nothing processed. I made sure that I didn't eat anything that could contribute to the inflammation that was affecting my brain.

It was hard work, and it took about a year to feel "normal", but I would like to offer that it can be done. Oh, and I also took several supplements recommended for brain health, like D3, B12, Omega 3, etc.

[Atticus64]

All is not lost. There is always hope. Check out two things. One Mindset podcast by Andrew Huberman. TwoCheck out the TBI forums at Neurotalk.

[Daesin]

Yes and it sucks hard. My new normal is a bitter pill but it’s what I have. I am working towards being friends with this new person in my skin. Physical and mental differences are really obvious and I’m no longer independent. I remind myself often that it could be worse. I have to remind myself often that I am blessed. And I rely on my therapist. Don’t try to do this alone. Get the right support around you.

[Daesin]

I wanna try this again.

Can you tell me one thing that is OK with your life right now? Maybe ….Your spouse is still on supportive and in love with you? Your kids are still healthy and happy? The dog loves you. You’re still able to work in the garden? You’re still able to what? What is it that you are still able to do that you enjoy? Just one thing.

Because that’s how you get through this. You hold on to the silver lining. Death grip it if need be. Continue to focus on the blessings. Learn to spin the perspective.

For example: I can’t do math in my head anymore. However I have a phone that I can simply ask these questions. Siri is a math wizard. I can either focus on the fact that my ability to do long division and algebraic equations in my head is over, I can mournthe fact that I have to bring pen to paper to subtract two digit numbers from each other — on a good day. And sadly there are days when I can’t get past it. The better thing to focus on, the thing I try to focus on is the positive. It’s not that I can’t do math anymore, I have a new tool. I am the controller of an external brain. Cool beans. That’s much healthier to focus on.

My social and professional world has drastically changed. So I don’t have the engagements and interactions with all of the people that I used to. But that means I don’t have to deal with a lot of the BS, a lot of the drama & a lot of the nonsense. Before I felt as if I had to smile and nod my head as Becky went on again about how terrible her relationship is. Or listening to Alex complaining about the consequences of his drinking. I really am seeing the positive on this one.

Usually works. Some days are much easier than others. I Hope you are able to be kind to yourself as you get to know this new person in your life.

[Catx1978]

Thank you for all the response they have given me hope. My neurophysiology told me to compare myself to thr person I was 3 months ago when I couldn't move, wlks, stand, talk or eat rather than the person I was before thr accident and to accept that I'll be a new person either elements of the old version of me. I even miss being able to do basic housework but have decided to do what I can and enjoy that I don't have to worry about what I can't do as I have a supportive husband and brilliant carers