MF side effects>: my partner has had MF for 3years... - MPN Voice

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MF side effects>

digbydivot profile image
4 Replies

my partner has had MF for 3years now. All that can be done is being done & she gets the best treatment possible in the world.

My question is as things progress is it only to be expected that other things change as well. Ie. my partner is becoming very spiteful & bitchy & everything I & others do is wrong. Should I accept the consequences of a huge argument if I say something or say nothing. If I speak up I will not be spoken to for days but I can live with that If its the MF. If it is not I don't know what to do.

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digbydivot profile image
digbydivot
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4 Replies
Mazcd profile image
MazcdPartnerMPNVoice

Hi, I am sorry to hear this, it is such a massive thing to come to terms with being diagnosed with a MPN, especially MF and does have affect how we view life, worrying about the future, dealing with all the symptoms, not being able to do things we used to be able to do. So it is understandable that your partner is having these bouts. I would suggest that you both have a look at this advice on our website, it may help you both, and then think about broaching the subject with her, I would imagine that it stems from fear and frustration.

mpnvoice.org.uk/living-with...

mpnvoice.org.uk/living-with...

mpnvoice.org.uk/living-with...

best wishes, Maz

crapaud profile image
crapaud

Sorry to read about your partner's problems and the impacts on yourself.

Apart from the consequences of the MF itself does your partner have medication that may explain in part her changes in humour?

For example, when I had high doses of cortisone I was obnoxious !!

My wife has always said to me that not enough thought is given to the partner who also suffers in other ways (I was the one who had the illness).

Hope things work out for you both.

Crapaud

Lainy1 profile image
Lainy1

Hi, I'm so sorry to hear you are both going through this but In different ways.

This site has a lot of useful information to help guide you both. We do forget out partners are affected by this too. My poor husband got the brunt of my tongue when i was coming to terms or having a bad day.The phrase "well you have this disease then and see what its like" was used a lot. It's awful that it tears people apart. Stay strong and know it's this terrible terrible illness that has caused this.

Best wishes to you both, lainy

JediReject profile image
JediReject

Hello digbydivot (great name by way) , I lived with my good friend MF for ten years and throughout I struggled to come to terms with how it impacted my life and being. Firstly the shock of diagnosis, then the realisation of taking a chemo drug and the stress of regular clinics especially as I didnt like needles. And even though I was on a fairly even keel for a number of years there was always the fear of the unknown in terms of where it would go.

And yes there were times when my nearest and dearest bore the brunt of my anger and mood swings. But what I did do was have a regular appointment with a specialist counsellor or Clinical Psychologist at my local hospital who specialised in cancer patients. I'm sure seeing her helped as I was able to speak freely about my inner most thoughts , fears, etc which I didn't want to burden my wife with. And I went for complementary therapy by way of reflexology which helped me relax.

DD, , as Maz and Lainy say MF tis a difficult diagnosis to come to terms with and to live with so your partners outbursts are understandable, however your partner needs your support especially as time goes on and would benefit from professional guidance to help them go forward hopefully more at peace with themselves. I hope you can both find a way to achieve this.

Best wishes ---Chris

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