15 years post meningococcal meningitis

[IamTitanium]

And it’s only just beginning to hit me how much of my precious life I’m never getting back.

I remember the doc saying as I left my 6 month stint having 2 heart attacks, dying twice, kidney transplant, survived two malignant melonomas and learning to eat read write walk and talk again,

Now Paul, this will affect you in the future.

It’s taken 15 years but it’s suddenly dawned on me, I was 22 when I caught “it”

And it’s robbed me of 13 years waiting for a transplant as we know it causes all kinds of other complications, and now I’m 38 I actually struggle with where I’m suppose to be. I’ve spent that much time poorly that now I’m better I feel useless as I never got to find myself in such a crucial part of life, 20’s and30’s

Struggling a bit now. Literally only just dawned on me.

[AHamilton11092016]

I’m not going to lie to you everything about your story crap life gave you a crappy situation and you’ve lost yourself to this terrible disease. I wish I could give you a kidney but I know the struggle that comes with that your immune system is very weak and recovery odds are more slim because of this has done to you. I’m not going to sugar coat say anything about being positive because I hear that all the time. I will say this to you it sucks man and your time isn’t up fight through it don’t let this get the best of you and the years you’ve lost; get it then back by keep moving forward get mad, scream, cry but whatever you do don’t give up. I’m in the military and soon I’ll be medically pushed out I can’t drive I can speak I barley can walk and I’m 33 years old. Fuck it and fuck this hand that we were delt. Smile in the mirror and know you’re not alone in this even if we are miles away from each other pain and crap brought us on the same page. Fight and don’t give into the pain. After all you are made of titanium the strongest steel of all.

[SimonaM]

Hi Titanium,

I am really sorry you had gone thru all that and now questioning a lot of things. Don't think that way, be stronger than how you are right now, you've fought those 13 years to get you thru to this stage now, don't give up the fight okay. Keep fighting more, harder and stronger than you had before, have faith and hope and don't let any negatives come cross your path. It's those negatives that will make you think and feel that way. You don't need them, they are no good to you and for you. I am a high hope, faith and very optimistic person, so please try and do that. Chill out with friends or family , laugh or cry a little you know whatever works for you to lift you up high than how you are now. Be strong, my prayers with you. X