Carer

[Ginjules]

Hi. I am trying to find out where I can get help regarding a middle relative with learning difficulties, he lives alone and I help when I can.. visit weekly, take meals etc., he is not taking care of himself but social services has said he does not meet their criteria. He is very vulnerable, not eating, no personal care and money is disappearing. Can anyone help? Thank you.

[Shue Community friend]

Hi Gingules. Your relative sounds very vulnerable and this must be a worry for you. I would call the helpline 0808 808 1111, the trained advisors will be able to answer your queries and have the information you need. I hope this proves helpful, best wishes.

[Ginjules in reply to Shue]

Thank you. I have tried the number. Very nice but could not give me info. Needed. Suggest social services but they have said he does not meet criteria.

[Shue Community friend in reply to Ginjules]

Sorry to hear that. Can I suggest you go along with him to his GP and speak about the concerns you have and his learning disability, he may be able to refer him somewhere. The gp is normally first port of call for most issues. Good luck and please let us know.

[Ginjules in reply to Shue]

Thank you Sue. I will do that.

[Sarah_Mencap]

Hello Ginjules

I am so sorry our helpline wasn't able to help. I would keep going back to social services again and again until they respond. Your relative may not be eligible for support from them, but they should be able to signpost you to other sorts of local support.

A few ideas:

* Age UK have a lot of local services, but it does depend how old your relative is.

* are there any other local charities who offer support in the community?

* does your relative work, see people socially, or go to clubs? There may already be people around him who are trying to support him if you could make contact with them

Your relative is so fortunate to have you helping him out. You are doing an amazing job. You may not realise it but you actually a carer and there is support for you (and indirectly you relative). See if there is a local carers centre near you ( carers.org/ ) as they will be able to advice you how best to support your relative. They will also have an excellent idea of what is available locally.

From an eating perspective, are there any meals services where you relative lives? Sometimes they can deliver hot, ready to eat meals, other times they can have them in the freezer.

Finally, money disappearing is very worrying. Do you know if your relative gets benefits and how helped him apply for these? Have you thought about being a lasting power of attorney for them - find out more about this here - mencap.org.uk/advice-and-su...

There is quite a lot to digest here, please do come back and ask more questions of any of these ideas are helpful.

Best wishes

Sarah