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split with partner , he said I was a loser with this illness , so sad people don't understand how hard it is to live with this condition .

dutchess profile image
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dutchess
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swirl profile image
swirl

I´m so sorry to hear that. I am fed up with criticism!!! Some of my work-mates say that all I have is in my mind and all I have is depression and hypochondria....Who are they to judge somebody so lightly??? Imagine my face when I hear those words... How can people be so rude and uncultured????

Living with this condition is a fight that few people understand. It makes you feel frustrated almost everyday.

But don´t worry!! Wherever you are, I UNDERSTAND YOU!!! Be strong, tomorrow you´ll be happier :)

XXXXXXXX from Spain

Rocki profile image
Rocki

Sending you hugs and love be strong he is the loser not you because you have everyone

Here To support you. i once knew someone who was very cruel to disabled people then fate gave him a disabled son what goes around etc

Keep your head held high, here for you always

X

I am so sorry to hear this and truly hope that you are getting the medical support you need with your diagnosis and that you at least have some family/close friend emotional support during this disappointing and frustrating time for you. We are all rooting for you. X

InSpain profile image
InSpain

Thinking about you. Sending you love and hugs from here InSpain xxx

Jillymo profile image
Jillymo

Hi Hun,

The only loser is him ! Your right they dont know how hard this curse of an illness is to live with.

I had a similar attitiude from an X boyfriend once.....but I always say what goes around comes around......one day he will be poorly & need someone at his side.....I just hope when that time comes he reflects on his words he spat at you.

My X came out with "you would'nt go out & buy a broken car would you" that was his way of refering to me......nice way of putting it !

I feel for you Iv'e been there.......chin up chick we understand on here so feel free to talk.. Jillymo x

GinaD profile image
GinaD

I strongly, strongly recommend that you read " The Camera My Mother Gave Me" by Susanna Kaysen. In this book Kaysen recounts her horrid medical trek from symptoms to diagnosis with a difficult to diagnose ( obviously) and treat diaease. Her partner left her because he claimed she was deliberately staying sick for . . . Some reason.

I immediately thought of this memoir as I read your post. Sharing our experiences does help us all cope. Her story will probably resonate with you, and you too may find your inner monologue voice saying " What a jerk!" to yourself long before Kaysen finally, reluctantly, comes to the same conclusion as her memoir winds down.

Best wishes.

Gina

Sarita profile image
Sarita

Hi there, sad to hear of your breakup...the loser is HIM.....if he didnt support you then he clearly wasn´t the right person for you....hope you find love and support and happiness or simply friendship....you have caring people right here who understand you.....big hugs xx

momtomany profile image
momtomany

I agree with the others. Your ex is the real loser! Back in my 20's, I had many, many miscarriages with my longtime partner (years before I knew anything of APS). I still recall him telling me sometimes you had to "crack a few eggs" to make an omelet . . . referring to our losses! The joke is on him now as my husband and I have had 2 successful pregnancies, and he even switched jobs so he could provide me with better health insurance. That is what love is.

There are decent, understanding people out there, and I truly hope you find a loving, caring partner. You are better off without that emotional abuse making you feel worse.

As I sat alone in a hospital bed after a ruptured eptopic pregnancy, a nurse came in to tell me to dump that jerk asap! While still groggy from the operation, he told me he would rather be with someone who wasn't always ill (and he had met someone with a better job). I'd raised his 3 kids while he went to uni, but he didn't want me home when I came out of hospital in case I was miserable. My parents were away, but he made it clear it wasn't his job to look after me. I still grieved the baby, but

I wouldn't really want him as the father.

Although I felt I'd been dealt a rough hand in life (The APS wasn't diagnosed but flaring up a lot + dislexic problems) I had to admit that my taste in men was causing most of my problems.

No way should anyone ever settle for blokes like him or your ex, but while he is the loser, you choose him. I'm not saying this to be crule, just the opposite- YOU can fix this.

A few weeks after I got out of hospital, my ex phoned my to guilt me in to babysitting. I decided to spend a year without a man, as I obviously had such terrible taste, and I went to stop with my sister in another country as she wanted some help and it was a good chance to get away. It was about 2 weeks after my year of chastity was over when I saw a guy in a bar and fell in love (corny, but yes at first sight) . He might be a bit useless supporting my problems, but that comes more from his inability to cope with the idea I'm not great, (his grief over subsequent miscarriages made us more together)

Last week, a waitress was surprised when she realised we were married, she thought we were still in them early perfect days, newlyweds then she asked. We've been together 10 years!

Take time to enjoy being you. Then enyone how doesn't enjoy you too is simply not worth your time

jetjetjet profile image
jetjetjet

sorry to hear of your problem with your partener-- you are much bewtter off with out him - now you can move on to greener pastures. you deserve much better in life --believe me :-)-------------------------------------- jet