Impact of brain injury on partners

[margaret_caley]

Is there anyone on this group who has experience of her boyfriend suffering brain injury leading to reduced mental capacity and severe physical disability?

My daughter is in a similar position and am looking for some insight and advice as to how they have coped with this and ideas as to how to support her.

[Pairofboots]

I am the brain injury. There is no manual. Headway can give some excellent support for carer's, and give a forum for peer support.

Good luck.

[LAJG]

Hi,

I believe I can sympathize with you because my wife had a brain aneurysm one coiled and one clipped and one of them ruptured on the operating table leaving her mentally challenge in some parts of the frontal lobe. She is by no means disable. It seems that I now am the enemy and everything I say and do is wrong, she thinks I am against her and all I wanna do is help her that’s why am on this site and other sites trying to get help. I have been dealing with this for about almost 7 yr, and just not sure what to do. I don’t want to walk away but if I stay I might make it worse.

[Symundo in reply to LAJG]

Hi La,

That’s how my ex girl friend used to act to me and she says she was normal but never believed her.

But temper and being annoyed I have, where if your concentrating doing something that takes your brain 3 months to do, I tell everyone to shut up and leave me to it.

It’s upset family quite a lot over the years.

It might be also if she was very controlling before. I know my little quirks I have are 5,000 times worse now.

I used to take calms for years that helped because Bach the id get wound up with wind.

If you can find the trigger points that causes all this. Temper, frustration, unable to concentrate there maybe something out there that can help.

It’s getting her to take it that’s the main dilemma if she thinks nothings wrong.

I chatted with a lass the other day on here whose hubby has a TBI and was sensitive to light. And I’ve got photophobia snow blindness. Does she get wound up with bright lights or daylight etc.

Does she get headaches/ migraines a lot ?

I noticed over the years that everyone’s pretty clueless about the brain except Neuro Surgeons and Neuro Psychiatrists.

Where really if you find out what’s wrong, your 90% there.

I’ve got frontal lobe damage and wrote down some of my TBI, look at the bottom of my profile and jot them down to see if your Mrs has any of them. The internet will show how to test for, or you may notice them very easily when you see them in writing.

Good luck

Sy

[katndog75]

Hi, get her to join the Facebook group Brain Injury Carers Support. It's a supportive community of people caring for family members and partners with a BI. There will be someone there who has been/is going through something similar.

[PCranston95]

I personally suffered with a severe brain injury but fortunately, I did not suffer with any physical disability. More so, reduced mental capacity unfortunately. So I could maybe help with a bit of something but not the full requirements if this helps? All the best on the recovery, never to far away for a chat If required.

[Symundo]

Hi Mage,

Wow, your unlucky girlfriends with unluckier boyfriends.

What’s the TBI injury. Were they on Glasgow Coma Scale, swollen brain, fractured Skull etc.

And what skeletal injuries they have broken?

I can give you my opinion on the way people act to me if that helps, and the ways I cope with my injuries fractured Skull, bleed from left ear, blood clot on brain drilled out, broken jaw and nose, punctured lung, two broken ribs, shattered Collar bone, shattered Elbow, shattered Shoulder, trachi In neck, 2 shattered tibia fibula, 2 shattered Kneecap, shattered hip.

Titanium rods fixated inside bone, to broken feet, skin graphs, severe brain damage, tinnitus, short term memory, no recent past recollection, reliant on all memories before the RTA. Attention span of a 7 your old, very slow processing speed, temper etc etc..

So do you want to know what to expect ?

Glasgow Coma Scale GCS gives a good idea how bad there head injury is.

Did they have brain swelling ?

Is there memory bad now where they promised you both £5,000 and a gigantic diamond ring.

There is another lady on here whose boyfriend got side swiped by a car I think and has a tbi.

All the best

Sy

[margaret_caley]

Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences - I appreciate it cant always be easy to do. I will direct her to the facebook/headway groups you have mentioned. Thanks and best wishes to you all