Hello there,
I feel very sheepish writing this post as I am the cause of my own injury, I hope that that is OK. I had a severe bout of depression due to my bipolar disorder 5 months ago which I wasn't handling correctly. I was extremely low and in a moment of (literal) madness I tried to hang myself. I am by no means suicidal now and feel a lot of shame because of what I did. To give up this wonderful life seems absolutely unacceptable and so selfish now, especially after reading some of the stories here.
I was (thankfully) found very quickly and was brought round at the scene.
I now have a mild hypoxic injury and a persistent headache. My memory is shot to pieces. Due to the situation, I was put in a psychiatric ward which had no neurological therapy but mindfulness, CBT etc. Luckily my speech and other functions remained relatively intact but I now have a lot of short term memory deficits. I'm looking for advice on how to regain my memory, I'm setting a lot of phone reminders and writing things on a notepad/to do list but I'm really motivated to reacquire my memory. Does anyone have experience in beating the memory problems which come with such an injury.
You've been to a really dark place James and no one should be judged for such an act of desperation. But shame is a good emotion if it's brought you to value your life again, and it's good to know you've found your way back.
Short term memory damage is usually an ongoing issue after brain injury ; something which can't be fixed but can be managed.
We can preserve our remaining capacity with regular mental stimulation, but it's usually a case of finding management aids (lists, notice-boards, phone alerts etc.) to help with functioning in the world of timetables, appointments & other important dates.
It can be really frustrating 'til we accept it as a fact and start taking practical measures to work around it.
Hope to see you around James.........glad you've found us. Cat x
Thank you very much for your reply! I know that I shouldn't feel bad about what I did. I'm just going to continue with my mobile phone reminders and lists. Sometimes when I go to write a todo list, I literally can't remember what it is I'm meant to be writing, it's all very frustrating. I'll just take it day by day and start to develop the right skills in order to help me with my memory problems.
That remark about making a note of something then forgetting what it was by the time you've found pen & paper will resonate with many here ; I know it does with me !
I still get frustrated after 6 years but don't dwell on the issue any more. It's more a laughing matter these days.................except for yesterday when I was getting ready to drive to my sons for Christmas dinner & found (in unopened post) that my car insurance had expired a week ago ! Luckily my son hadn't had any alcohol so collected me, and all was well.
I'll be reinsured tomorrow, but it just shows how vulnerable we are, especially when preoccupied with other stuff. Could've been a ban !
The sun's shining here in NW ; hope you're seeing it too James. x
Thanks. I feel less alone now. Lucky you found the letter! The sun wasn't out here in Scotland but it rarely is.