Losing Hope

Hey guys! I just wanted to write about how I'm really losing hope. So much scares me. The thought of not being able to sustain a job, an independent lifestyle, and one day create a family of my own is getting to me. The deficiency in memory is so obvious to me it is the worst type of torture. I feel so bad because hypoxic injuries carry such a poor prognosis and because I haven't improved any over time. I just want it to be fixed. I just want it to be fixed that's all.

11 Replies

  • Please don't lose hope, things can change over time, it's not easy to have patience but you have to keep trying things, your brain can't make new pathways unless you keep trying, hopefully it'll pay off.

    It's not easy watching people get on with their lives not understanding the daily hurdles you face just to do the simplest of tasks sometimes, but we understand on here, have you spoken to Headway?, is there anywhere you can attend to help you build up your problem areas.

    Winter isn't an easy time, it's so much easier to tackle things when it's brighter and warmer.

    My thoughts are with youxxxxxx Janet

  • It has just been so many years with no difference in improvement. If anything the problem is only getting worse. Because of the nature of the injury, there are coping mechanisms-which I've learned on my own already-but no true rehabilitation which will provide me with what has been lost. I live in the U.S. actually so the most support headway is able to offer me is through this site. I feel as though I live in a state of mental torture. Conscious enough to be so acutely intune to my own cognitive deficiencies. It drives me insane. I am aware that I have no memory of where I've placed things, or what certain conversations consist of. It's torturous.

  • hi, have you come across this site neurotalk.psychcentral.com/...

    This is mainly a US and Canada site and is as friendly as this one - not that we want to lose you but they may have a lot of information on what is available locally to you

  • Hey, thanks for sending me that link! i'll have to check it out!!

  • Yes, I do understand, I must admit that although I encourage the family to laugh with me at my problems that laughter is very hollow on my part, it is no laughing matter when you are an intelligent person and have to learn to cope with these problems, every day when I wake I hope today may be the day I see great changes. It must be twice as hard the younger you are, I'm afraid there's not enough years ahead of me but you must see the years stretching ahead and want the change now.

    I'm afraid as I don't know what is available in the US I can only provide this type of support.

    I fill my days, reading, doing puzzles, watching tv and DVDs, knitting crocheting and other crafts, it taxes my brain and my motor skills and I have seen improvements but they are slow and what I do could be seen as very boring and tedious, even I think so at times.

    I bake and cook also even if I do make a mess, I also can't remember what're I place things, if I don't put the food shopping away I can't find things even if they are in the place they belong, very frustrating.

    I won't insult you by telling you to rejoice in those things you can do, it's the things you cant do that matter to you most now, I hope you will work through this and as the weather brightens your mood will lift also, I am thinking of you and sending all the support I can


  • I can comiserate with ypu Since last March my life has been totally turned upside down. I was induced into a coma which is a ordeal in itself. But. apart from liver damage and other medical issues the memory loss is the worse and as I am aware of what I doing I still do it. The hoplessness is soul destoting. Its took me over a hour to write this as I keep spelling words wrongly

  • I get how that is, there's so much time ahead, and everyone is getting on with it.

    But this is our lives, and that's it, the world will keep turning without batting an eyelid, whether we like it or not. There's only so much theory that can be discussed until something must be done. What do you like doing? What do you want to be? Put this stuff down on paper so you can see it, and give yourself a time limit. You don't have to stick by it forever, you can tear that up and make a new list of stuff, but just starting builds self-esteem like nothing else.

    The world is scary, but I like to think of it as I now have absolutely nothing to lose, so I might as well drag my crappy body outside and try to make something out of myself.

    Oh and smile :)

  • So sorry to hear you have had such a hard time,i had two operations one to incert a shunt,the second to quartise nerve over one eye.It cured my custer headaches,but has left me with a very bad short memory problem and very withdrawn and quiet.I go to a head injury place in totton hampshire called Headway,who have helped me,and i have manage to get a job at a local school as a cleaner, as they where the only ones who gave me a chance and im very grateful to them,but i do have my moments where i read the wrong signs and get very moody,plus i have stopped going out altogether which doesnt help matter.You hang in there,we all need to be fixed,i know where you are coming from,have a good day and good luck in the future.

  • I know it's hard. I've been through it myself and continue to feel anxiety, but im fighting it the best I can.

    It's a nightmare having memory impairement, the worst being spatial because Im forever getting lost and being humiliated. short term memory also drives me insane because It interrupts daily life.

    However, I'm doing the best i can to stop these ruining my life. I love to study and am doing a course in the psychology of mental health, looking for an internship in raising awareness of mental health and currently looking for my own flat i can share with a lodger who shares the same interests.

    I've been hit by a car, raped in Africa and had a brain haemmorage. With the support of my family and friends along with my CBT I have fought my traumas and am currently winning. Il never get over all that has happened to me because of the many reminders, e.g. Dangerous driving and a man approaching me, but I fight the anxiety and not 'freeze' I.e. give up (my psychology lecturer termed)

    Please keep going. Yes life's so unpredictable that it can be worrying but what has happened to you has made you who you are and im sure many people admire your character.

    Try listening to your favourite music and smells e.g. Lavender to relax.

  • I had a Hypoxic brain injury and i've imporved vastly! Dont give up hope! I worry about the same things, but i just try to take each day as it comes!


    I'm going to cry. You're the first person I've met who had a hypoxic injury who has gone on to lead a relatively normal life. Oh my god I'm crying. I'm so happy to hear that someone has made it.

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