Doe anyone feel like a burden on their family and just want to curl up and die
Query : Doe anyone feel like a burden on their... - FND Action
Query
Written by
Parrot74
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9 Replies
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Hi Parrot.
Oh my goodness, please don't feel like that. Your family will love you and want to support you - it's what families do. I know it can be hard on them/for them, just as it is desperately hard for us FNDers, and I know all too well how down we can get sometimes - it's just not possible to be positive all the time. Give in to your feelings when you need to and have a good old cry, but then try and find something positive to help lift you afterwards (even something as small as seeing the sun shining, hearing birds singing, thinking of something lovely that you will eat later - the thought of chocolate does it for me!! Then, when you're having a more "up" day, focus on bigger positives - things you have achieved, the fact that you have family there who want to help you...)
Have you talked to your family about this? They wouldn't want you to feel like a burden, and they certainly won't see you as one - sometimes they feel awkward as they don't always know exactly what to do to help without seeming like they're fussing. I always think it's best to talk to them. If that feels difficult, could you write it/type it and show your family? Just write as if you're writing in a diary, then show them. It'll probably feel quite therapeutic just getting the words out and not bottling them up. Of course, you can always "talk"/write on here, too.
Hang on in there Parrot. Sending you luck and strength and positive thoughts x
Hi again Parrot,
Just wondered how you're doing at the moment? Hope you're having a reasonable time at the moment.
Take care
Not to great...
Got an abscess and meant to be going to Australia on 1st March
Mentally wise... Empty
Oh bless you. Hopefully you can get the abscess seen to very soon, then you've got something positive to focus on - going to Australia! Wow! Have you been before? What an adventure! I do hope you'll feel a lot better soon and be able to enjoy your trip.
Take things one day at a time. Good luck, and enjoy Australia.
Thank you
This will be my third time over there...
Got family over in Perth....
Wonderful place to be...
Actually feel happy...
Hi Parrot, I can definitely relate to how you were feeling. In my situation, because my condition has gone on for months now, and I am still awaiting treatment, to my family, and I guess those who don't know me, I look normal most of the time, unless I get a tremor or visible symptoms, which are not always present, and what I find is they do not understand. They do not feel the pain I feel, I try to keep my anxiety and feelings in, but they are less controllable when out, something I am trying to get help with and work on. But yes it is a very dark place to be in, but I at that point just had to focus on me, my health, and how I was going to get the help I need to get me through this. If my family or whoever didn't understand, then it was there problem, I couldn't focus on that because it is all too much, and with this condition I have found that there seems to be a priority order that must be addressed and everything else around has to be blocked out until that has been dealt with. It may sound selfish, but this is a mental health problem that has to be dealt with in a physical way in order to heal the mind with whatever works for each individual . I hope you have found a way forward, but you must take care of yourself, if those around you can't take the time to find out and understand what you are going through and support you, you have to put there feelings to one side and block them out, otherwise you find yourself worrying about others, what they are thinking about you, and it will destroy you. This is how I felt myself feeling, it may not have been the same for you, but this is how I managed to deal with it, and I think that was one of the most difficult things to do. My experience may not be of any help, but I just wanted to share my empathy for what you were/are going through.
Hi Parrot,
I am glad I have been able to help, as well as others who have replied to you. We all have very challenging times ahead. The most important thing I find is to have goals to focus on each day. It may be something very small, it may be several small goals, but it is a good way to keep focused. It's the little things that make all the difference, even if you can have a moment to sit in garden if you have one, to have a cup of tea, or whatever beverage you like, and just sit, listen to the birds etc and zone out. I know I still have a way to go, not sure whether I will fully recover, but one has to remain positive and I feel that may not be cured, but I will be able to get to a point when I can manage this , and will get back some normality. From other peoples responses that I have seen to this condition, I feel this is a common feeling, so this hopefully will give you some hope, and yes you definitely are not alone. xx
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