4 1/2 years old boy poo in his pants

[Kirst94]

My son just poo in his pants and doesn't say anything to anyone. He quite happily just sit in it. We go in this circle of he can go to the toilet and do poos then he'll get sore and constipated and won't go on the toilet just his pants and be like that for a while. He is currently on laxicdo he is soft poo and not sore on his bottom and just can't work out why he won't go to the toilet you ask and he gives the you answer exactly where you go for a poo.

It's so frustrating we tried reward charts etc we think he has adhd but not confirmed due to his age.

Any suggestions please?

[fjoweu]

Hi Kirst. We have just come out of the back of this situation (except without with the adhd elemet) with our 4.5yr over the summer. if you feel you have the level of laxicdo correct (we are on movicol) then there is a time lag between them making the connection to doing the poo on the loo. Constipation can lead to loosing the sensation of needing a poo. it doees come back but not straight away. We had reward charts which didnt appeal UNTIL he annouched he'd like a rosette (of all things). So we said when he had 100 starts on his star chart he'd earn a rosette. He was able to earn as many stars a he liked during the day because they were for 'sitting' on the loo and not 'having a poo' on the loo. he also earned a star if he proactively told us he's pooed in his pants. we kept things very calm (hard at times) and lots of praise. i think the fact he was working towards something he had asked for the motivation came from within. Then once the connection between pooing on the loo is formed they run with it. No stars needed now, but remiders about 'trying for the loo' before leaving the house etc. Started School in Sept and only one accident. lovely to see him growing in confidence as a result. so my advice would be see what he really wants and make that the reward if possible. stay clam and positive. expect it to take some time. sorry i cant offer help on the adhd part. good luck. hope this helps.

[Kirst94 in reply to fjoweu]

Hi thank you. Yeah it helps and currently putting a reward chart together a toilet one a picture of and planning to put sticks on it when he sits on the toilet and even if he tries /goes for a poo. I'm not too sure if there's talhat 1 thing he really wants but he does like new toys cars etc

He started school which worried me alot and now he doing his normal thing I get so stressed as I don't know what more I can do hopefully this reward chart helps x

Thanks again 😊