A most lost my husband to social services yesterday.

[Noella21]

R had the flu . I had a bad night keeping him changed and stay g awake all night for fear he would asperate his vomit. Hubby can only lay on his back and is not able to turn over. The agency that provides carers notified the case manager and they wanted to hospitalized R . They feel I that with my cancer progressing I will not be able to care for him . They want to reacess him for a care home. I knew he was over the worst . It is a 24 hr flu. I suddenly realized that if I sent him I might never get him Back here. I can not imagine what they could do for R in hospital for a flu bug that I could not do here. My kitchen is open 24/7. I made him jello' chicken soup , gave him sips of flat ginger ale around the clock. In our hospital they have nothing on the floor to give people during the hours the kitchen is closed. In the morning R was feeling much better his clolor was good and his appetite returned. So I refused to send him. Once they get him in hospital social worker gets involved and the push to get him in care home is on. We want to spend our last days together . If I have to be hospitalized than they will have to take him in too. Until than we will stay home together. We have carers 4 hrs in the morning and one hr at bed time. If I was here alone there would be no one coming to check on me . All the care will be taken away if R is not here. R is his old self again today begging me to play tile rummy with him. He never says anything except tile rummy and coffee. How I would miss that if he were not here. I hope this was not selfish of me. I know he would fully understand if they tried to put him in a home.

.

[fwes]

Group Hug!

Your writings are honest and moving. Clearly full of Love! Your choice to spend as much time as you can with your husband is not selfish. It is an unselfish Love Gift. Bless You!

[Tinker-bell]

Not selfish - the best possible action for you both I feel sure. I am PwP and my husband and I would want to do the same. Enjoy each day together!

[Bailey_Texas]

Stay with R as long as you can. You are a special person to care for R.

[dolltearsheet]

You are an angel.

[Dene10]

Noella21 - You're an angel. Good luck to both of you.

[HeartSong]

Noella21, my heart goes out to you. Consider yourself hugged.

[redean]

I can understand your reasoning with this. Care and love are good together. Some places are very good but they're not the same. You are not uncaring however if you cannot handle it . So many different circumstances. And I wish you the best together!

[Niludi]

Hi no its not selfish of you, you love your husband and I think you are doing a great job even with your cancer.I can imagine that if he was not there and without the careers too you would be very lonely. And ofcourse u would miss him all of a sudden u would nothing to do, so keep him with you for as long as u can manage.

Niludi

[easterncedar]

Dear Noella - how are you doing? I just realized we haven't heard from you, the mighty warrior, for a while. I hope you are okay. Love and hugs, Ec

[Noella21]

We are finding it even more challenging as our health declines. I have had it think outside the box to make sure that we have enough coverage . Ron has self managed care dollars from Alberta health. We can hire help with that our contract with any agency with those dollars. There is a lot of paperwork but once you get the hang of it. I have 3 agency's involved and an adult day program once a week. I also have home care workers supplied by homecare that is also funded by Alberta health. I have figured it out so that we are never very long without care. I bet Alberta health just loves the paperwork I send them. I have invoices from all those different places. I just love sticking it back to them. Nobody else has done this before but it is perfectly within any of the rules . Nothing they can do. They send me my approval so far so good.This ND medical appointments have kept me busy. I do not spend as much time on line. Thanks for asking. I am always glad to contribute if I feel it has not already been said or if the mood strikes. I think of you all and pray over as I read your posts. Love Noelle.

[M1tz1]

You and your husband are in my heart and my prayers, Noella.