Introduction

[Daisy55]

Hi

So thankful for this community.

I am 65 and care for my husband who has Aspergillosis, Emphysema , digestive problems and recently found out he has various heart problems now . Also it is a daily struggle with food as he has disease malnutrition , I have to change foods regularly and visually . He has prescription foods and sees a dietician . It’s the frustrations daily that are difficult for me , as it has affected him mentally . He never has been a communicator but is now worse after a spell in hospital last October with Community Pneumonia from which I did not think he would survive . He is 67 and still can work at home on his computer , as he wanted to continue , it is what keeps him going . I have had a panic alarm installed , we have walkie talkies , so I can at least walk to the shop or post box , or be in the garden .

I find it’s the daily frustrations with his lack of communication that affects me . They mentioned this in hospital . I have always said he has had a form of autism , but no one ever listened . Now going into older years and with the poor health , it is just as it is .

I have fibromyalgia and osteoarthritis .

We do not go out anymore other than locally , recently he has not wanted to even do that as he gets so tired .

So that’s us and my introduction .

[sassy59]

Welcome to you Daisy and I’m so pleased you have found this wonderfully supportive community.

Your situation sounds extremely difficult and frustrating as your husband seems to be in a world of his own. I don’t know if you have anyone who could sit in with your husband to allow you to go out for a while to have time to yourself.

You have health issues too so I really feel you need help. Maybe your GP would be a good starting point.

I do wish you well and please stay in touch. Take care xxxx

[Hidden]

Hello Daisy65,

Welcome to our group! It's great to hear from you and thanks for such a comprehensive introduction. It's good to hear others' experiences, and you'll be in the company of people who, like you, have their own health challenges, whilst caring for someone else.

Sorry to hear that communication with your husband is becoming an issue for you. I think it's probably true to say that it's only recently been recognized how many people are actually on the autism spectrum, so you could well be right.

Anyway, you seem to be doing the best that you can under some pretty trying circumstances.

If you can find a way, try to have a few outings now and again, even if your husband is no longer interested in going out. It's not always easy I know, but if you can find a way to have someone else help with him for an hour or two so you can get out with a friend, or even on your own, for some respite, it will help refresh you to feel better able to cope.

And do remember that we are all here for you and you're welcome here any time you like.

[Daisy55]

Thank you both so much x

[starveycat]

I don't know if this will help but I joined a knit and natter group so I get 2hours a week of being just me . I love it. My hubby is 83 and cannot move unaided as for me my prescription is ,3 pages long enough said. So very sorry your husband does not communicate much must be very difficult for you. But please try to join a group it helps so much gentle hugs