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Evening difficulties

Hi, I am caring for a chap with dementia, he is depressed and finding activities is challenging. As soon as it gets dark he wants to go to bed which means he is usually awake on and off thru the night. I have tried offering showers, supper, cocoa, tv programmes that usually attract his attention and music. The other complication is he insists his wife goes to bed at the same time.

Any ideas to alleviate this situation would be gratefully received.

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I am afraid this is a symptom of dementia. Maybe you could chat to the doctor and see if a short course of sleeping pills could help him stay asleep longer. Maybe you could shut the curtains earlier while it is still light and put lots of light on so that he doesn't realise that night has come.

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Unfortunately this and every other aspect of dementia is cruel and evil to every sufferer and thier carers, and the not sleeping part is one of the worse parts, my dad and I both have Dementia so it’s with expierence that I know, I’m nowhere near that lvl yet, my Dad is and the amount of sleeping pills is rediculas lol, I hope you find some peace and rest soon.

Philip

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Hi Rosieray and welcome to the forum where you will receive support from other members. Exhaustedwife has given a helpful reply and it may be a good idea to mention his depression to his GP. I have been doing some research and DementiaUK dementiauk.org/get-support/... has some really good practical ideas and helpful information. There are very good sections about light and noise, communication and complimentary therapies. Admiral nurses give practical, clinical and emotional support to families living with dementia to improve their quality of life. They work in various community settings. Admiral Nurse Dementia Helpline 0800 888 6678. email helpline@dementiauk.org. Are there any other members of the forum who could help Rosieray, please? Thank you and best wishes.

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This is a problem with my Mum , especially in the winter when it's dark at 4 , it called Sundowning , After trying everything Doctors put Mum on Trazadone , it was a originally an Antibiotic , but they found it had a side effect of making you drowsy ,but not like an heavy sleeping tablet , any way, so far been on them 2months and she's doing great going to bed couple of hours later and getting a good 5-6 hrs sleep , still gets up occasionally but not like before and we got her a dementia radio to listen to if she wakes up, it only has 1 button on top so no problems with it . As for asking his wife to go to bed as well , I'm not sure how to help you there as mum been a widow for over 30 yrs x

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Never heard of a dementia radio, what a great idea, are they widely available ?

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Yes they are , From unforgettable.org about £45

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They do lots of amazing products for different stages of Dementia

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Thanks for that 😃

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Hi Rosieray. It's really challenging caring for anyone with any kind of dementia and it sounds as if you've tried all the practical, non-medical things. A doctor is needed for this, and some kind of sedation. It's all well and good denying the general population this sort of help, but this man has an incurable and progressive disease and to restore some peace to him and his wife, and you as his carer, it's time to call on the heavy 'guns'.

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I agree with the bright lights and closed curtains, although that may not be too helpful for the wife! Alternatively arrange a club to go out to in the evenings once a week.

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