Could I have gotten cirrhosis from a holiday relapse?

[Vladimirberkov]

I've been struggling hard with alcohol addiction. A health scare last year ended me up in the hospital as well as a bunch of tests with a hepatologist and a fibroscan which showed me at F2. Since then I've tried very seriously to stay sober, eat healthy, etc. The last tests I had were in October which also included a CT and an ultrasound, which showed nothing out of order. Stupid me then all alone for Christmas decides a drink or two couldn't hurt, and ends up binging for a couple weeks until i realize I'll just go down the same bad path and have quit again. My anxiety is super high anyway but should I be worried that I've undone all the good work I did being sober just with a short binge? It feels like the anxiety of that makes it feel hopeless and is making me want to drink again even though I know it's bad for me.

[Laura009]

Call it a blip and get back on the straight and narrow again. Don't get all anxious about it just put it behind you. Keep reminding yourself alcohol is poison to your liver and you dont want it or need it. Leave it in the past now where it belongs .

[Vladimirberkov in reply to Laura009]

Thanks....I'm trying and also in AA as well. I just will end up spend hours checking my eyes and wondering if it's jaundice or not, reading forums, googling. Not drinking seems to open up a lot of my time for stressing out over things!

[Laura009 in reply to Vladimirberkov]

Googling will only make you feel worse. So don't . Don't keep searching in your eyes either. If they were jaundiced, as l keep saying on here, you wouldn't have to look for it, the yellowing is bright and blatantly obvious. If you are having councelling, talk about this irrational feeling of anxiety. Anxiety itself will make you ill.

[Notzathros in reply to Laura009]

Thanks. I too keep checking my eyes. Never sure what I'm seeing. Good to know trouble will be obvious.

[Kcass33 in reply to Notzathros]

Just to back up what Laura said, I had jaundice from an antibiotic-related liver issue and it was immediately obvious despite it being my first symptom and not looking for it - I just glanced at a mirror and saw my eyes were yellow. There is no need to check, although I understand that anxiety makes it tempting.

[Hidden in reply to Vladimirberkov]

I spent years checking my eyes. Stop worrying and just don’t drink. Driving yourself crazy with Worry isn’t worth It.

[MsJayhawk in reply to Vladimirberkov]

From someone who has been sober for 33 years can I please suggest that instead of googling, read the Big Book and work the steps.

I know how hard it is as I went to treatment all those years ago to get sober and have had PBC for 5 years. I also know that the first few years are very hard so stick with the program and ask for help.

May God bless you with many more years to enjoy,

Kathey

[Ruggerhead]

Can you get a set of LFT's just to see if there is any acute damage, then maybe a fibrascan. From my research, a drinking session would possibly spike some markers, maybe thats the first step.

[Vladimirberkov in reply to Ruggerhead]

I have an appointment with the specialist again in April for a retest so I have that. It's just the anxiety that's killing me. I don't have any massive symptoms like vomiting blood or stool, etc. Only my worry about my eyes and retaining water, terry's nails, etc. Though every time I've been to the doctors they look at those and say they are normal even though to me it looks different over the past year. I feel like people will look at me and know I have cirrhosis even if I don't.

[Ruggerhead in reply to Vladimirberkov]

Take it from me Worry can bring up any symptom you can imagine, that's why there is a ' Worried well' name. Good that your going back in a couple of months and that you are remaining healthy in the meantime.

[Vladimirberkov in reply to Ruggerhead]

Yeah it becomes so you are your own worst enemy. Like right now I'm looking at my tongue and it definitely seems red and swollen, so I immediately start searching to see if it's a sign of cirrhosis. It seems it might be a sign of vitamins being low which I likely do have with a very poor diet and drinking over the past month. I'm not seeing much on it being linked to cirrhosis but now I'm CONVINCED it is. Crazy.

[Ruggerhead in reply to Vladimirberkov]

V, realise one thing that is certain, that if you google symptoms then they will in part become a reality. Just think how many times you have asked, am i getting the flu, am i getting the flu then viola you convince yourself. Some of these symptoms are probably not related and brought on my stress and anxiety. Even in medical literature there is still an argument over whether psychological stress etc can cause ulcers, some say no others say yes. I know you dont have another consultation until April so keep on track with your diet, non alcohol and exercise regime until you know your scan results. In the meantime is their anyway you could get a set of LFT's done? even privately, I know bloods are no substitute for meeting with your Doc, and also cannot be evaluated on sites but may give you an indication of your general health ie vitamins, inflammatory markers etc etc. Try and not worry, and distress a bit until you know where you are, you have a lot of things going for you my friend.

[Hidden]

Hello, firstly, congratulations on your return to abstinence.

You are not alone and there is help out there. Maybe you could consider visiting your GP and having an open and honest chat with them? Please see the link below for guidance from the British Liver Trust.

britishlivertrust.org.uk/in...

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