My 20 year old Son, Brendan

My 20 year old Son, Brendan

August 8th this year my son just turned 20, happily living in Colorado came home to visit for Birthday was car surfing and flew over 50 feet. Mom (me) got the phone call so I drove to Iowa City where he was airlifted and in coma for weeks not expected to live, stayed there with him, he survived.. He can now walk, talk, travel, and just got told he can drive again HOWEVER something is NOT THE SAME with him right before his 8 hour Brain surgery it's like something SNAPPED inside him now he stopped talking to me completely out of nowhere and if he does text me he says things like "I hope you kill yourself, Your just as bad as the kid who did this to him, and etc." I get TBI but I cannot understand the son I knew would never or never talked to me like this before August 8th. I'm alone and now without him, I have 2 other girls 13 & 2 and he is 20 but won't even talk to his sister or my family (cousin, Aunt or Grandmother) His dad took him home from the hospital and supposedly he is angry there too.

4 Replies

  • I was normal until I had fallen from a horse. 1 year later I had a tumor and then brain surgery one and since I have had 2 more surgeries and 80 radiation treatments to my brain. Anyone with a TBI will more than likely change personal and seem like a new person. I described it as " I woke up one day and I was someone new". I have gotten better over time. Although I will have many issues functioning well with others. I'm very sorry for your son. I think he has front temporal lobe damage. This part of your brain is what makes you ... you. Your behavior, personality , and communication skills are impaired. Please don't stop talking to him. If not for my loving parents and the lord.... I would not be here today.

    If you have any questions please feel free to ask. I have been fighting for 16 years.


  • Strange I have left temporal lobe damage for years from ECT that certainly didn't work.I getting there Day by Day.Just found the remote control and my watch missing for hours (Under the pillow!)

  • I had the same although could be major trauma he is at some point going to have PTSD after any accident like that let alone a brain operation or coma.After my accident I thought I was a murdered I should have died and would go to jail(I can't imagine brain surgery as well it's a massive shock to you all (My life is not the same and my family's defo not but he will at some point I really hope get better (It's awful for you looking on I realise that now)I was oblivious to a certain degree...Medication but it took months of shock as In no response me thinking I was fine then bang it hit me I cried I got very angry with everyone had awful flashbacks went to a psych hospital it helped finally don't despair try Keep thing as normal for yourself take it on the chin!!He is in oblivion please don't tell him what he has said (let him recover and you be grateful he made it he has his fighting spirit he will need it and you will.)My brother and family put there phones on Vibrate now I live with my parents finally in an adapted house I get out with friends (And have my 8 year old son)I maybe not the same but I have my name not a hospital number!!Physio is good rehab is good ❤️🌈Keep me posted and big hugs to you all

  • I fell 8 meters don't even go there it was and is a nightmare (for those around you)My son was kept away one visit was enough for a 6 year old (Friends got shouted at text gibberish deleted on purpose!!)But I still knew who understood what I was going through or has any bone of compassion in there body (He is your Boy that's clear from your text he is dearly loved with that you can somehow find some semblance of normality I hope I broke lots of bones but not a brain injury (I probably have that now..)Keep going keep visiting don't argue with the text give him space I yelled mainly at my Mum (I blamed her for everything if all you can do is washing and meals it's a major help!!)My Mum has held us together by taking us both in and keeping my son a priority he was also mine(and always will be others visited )Family and friends I finally get dropped in town with a friend and do semi normal stuff on crutches ...

You may also like...