When I was young, I was bald.
Then my hair grew.
Then I started thinking, and my hair grew faster, and wavier.
Many years later, my thoughts turned radical and revolutionary.
Then my hair started falling out, in patches.
I was going bald, AGAIN.
Thinking heats the brain, and that stimulates the roots into growing hair, thicker, wavier and quicker.
Thinking hot radical thoughts with PASSION, causes the brain to overheat, which burns the roots, and lets the hair fall out.
Blondes are exempt from this process because although they have thoughts that may be very hot and passionate, only rarely are they radical or organised enough to have effect.
One theory about baldness was that it was caused by growing too fast thereby leaving the hair behind.
This theory was later discounted after observing people standing up and sitting down. People with hair who were sitting down did not turn bald after standing up. Neither did standing bald people suddenly grow hair when they sat down.
Please feel free to discuss.
Breathe easy all.