its happened - i've lost my job :(

Had a visit from the HR dept and my manager yesterday and basically ive lost my job.

Apparently they do not have another permanent job for me so i have been given 2 options - either medically resign based on incapability ( due to the fact i have to be accredited by the home office and to get this i must be able to do control and restraint) - if i retire i get a months pay plus and holiday due.

option 2 is i don't resign and in 2 weeks time they will sack me as on incapability grounds - then i get nothing.

I have spoke to BLF benefits officer who is looking into the best option for me.

I understand why they need to sort it out as i am a manager and they are paying me full wages and paying someone else to do my job, (and can't legally employ someone to do it on a permanent basis as i still hold the position ) but i am finding it really hard to accept myself as unemployed. I don't do unemployment very well!!!!

Trying to keep optimistic and thinking as i am worse in the winter i could try and get a seasonal job - living where i do we have legoland, thorpe park, chessington and a lot of "royal" visiting places within a 10 minute drive. so i am keeping my spirits up that way ( and my fingers crossed!!) and thinking of the future.

\In all honesty i knew it would happen - it was a case of when not if........................

40 Replies

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  • I'm so sorry krazylady that you are about to lose your job - I don't know what to say to make you feel better Ah I know here goes "THE SUN IS SHINING" no well I tried at least you may be able to do something krazy to suit you name lol! Keep positive

    Karen

    XX

  • I can't imagine what's going through your mind at the moment krazylady :( but this may be a golden opportunity to look on it as 'when one door closes, another one opens' :) ....... I do hope so :) and wish you all the luck in the world with whatever you decide. xx

  • Hi Krazylady, I hope everything works out for you, must admitt i dont do well being at home it gets very isolated. Guess the best thing is to try to keep yourself busy and seeing friends if you can and stay positive that something better comes along that will be better for you best of luck hun and hoping it all turns out for the best for you xx

  • Chin up, like you say you are lucky to have all those places around you where you may be able to get seasonal work.

    Take the winter to rest yourself and get as well as you can. Enjoy some you time.

    I had to finish work at 55 and when the pressure was off I soon got into a new routine and loved being at home.

    polly

  • Know how you feel Krazylady, I was made redundant last year and haven't been able to get a job since. I suppose at nearly 61 and not in good health I am not a good candidate. Its not so bad when you get used to it and at least I get my state pension in May. I have to live on my savings until than, I can't claim a bean at the moment which angers me after all that I have paid in. Anyway the seasonal work sounds a good idea for you, hope it works out for you. Keep smiling :)

  • So sorry that you have bad news,

    I can relate to what you are going through, when it happened to me seven years ago I thought I would never cope, I was medically retired at age 56 I had worked in my local infant school as a special needs teaching assistant, for eighteen years,I took many qualifications and had not long finished my OU degree psychology(hons) but my back caved in spinal disc disease and vertebra slipped backwards, they kept my job open for eighteen months but It came to the point when I was told they could not operate. The county council doctor assessed me and said I would never work again, being unsafe with the powerful medicines I still take, (my asthma did not start untill two years ago) I also developed fibromyalgia and have done all the pain management courses, then left alone! I became very isolated and my world became these four walls,All those qualifications became meaningless, my husband has to work so getting out and about is only on weekends. But Xmas last he bought me this iPad and signed up to sky, my world suddenly became very wide again. I also was given when I retired a huge amount of equipment,watercolour, paper,brushes etc.ect. I finally felt strong enough to join a art class and of course this excellent site..

    It does take awhile to adjust especially if it is the last thing you want, just take your time you are a very positive person I enjoy reading about you, as you said yourself you are keeping your spirits up so work on that, take each day as it comes, think of all the things you wished you could do while at work, well now is the chance and I don't mean housework!! Today is the day for the rest of life. Enjoy it. B.

  • sorry to hear that kerry i'm losing mine to just a matter of time now xxx

  • So sorry - I sort of knew something was going on with you although didnt connect it with your work - and well done with all your troubles starting a blog for Val.

    Take time to reflect really don't know what to say to you except keep off the fags if you can I'm saying this as I know that would be my first reaction sort of "what the h---" does it matter now. Its important that you keep well at this stage of the game and I have no doubt whatever that there are still plenty fireworks to come from you once the dust settles and it will.

    Love and take care of yourself!

  • When we talk about Val i am the lucky one

    despite being very, very ill Val has been an amazing friend to me and sometimes i wonder what i would do without her - she is incredibly selfless and thoughtful and i love her to bits xxx

    Val keeps me going most of the time , the only thing i hate is i am so far away i cant go and annoy her in person!!!! :)

  • Anytime for a coffee ha ha. Come to Slaley Hall :) x

  • *checks google maps* errrrr do i need a passport if i'm going that far!!!! lol :)

  • Could always meet half way u know :) x

  • I am sorry to hear your news. Am I right in thinking you work in the public sector? I only say that as you mention control and restraint with Home Office sanction.

    If so, they should be looking to transfer you to another Government Department which might be able to accommodate your working needs.

    Sorry if I'm off the track there.

    Lynne x

  • sadly no! - its a home office contract otherwise i would have been OK .

    i have been off work for 10 months now and have "adjusted" to the home life but have to admit it wasn't easy.

    With the exception of giving birth ( even when i was pregnant) i have worked - its not just the financial side but the social side as well, my son and partner have been talking about getting me a mobility scooter so that i can get out and about - even if its just to the shops.- i do drive but unfortunately i get a severe cramp like pain in my ribs, start coughing then cant breathe,if i need to turn so i wont drive unless it is vital to do so - i live in a very busy area and so i get scared i may have/cause an accident.

    once i have got through winter i am hoping i am well enough to get a bit of seasonal work ( and if its at legoland its free tickets all round !!!! lol :) ) i reckon i could cope on one of those concession stands.

    a bit down about it and have told the doctor i don't want antidepressants yet ! he was not too happy as he said COPD sufferers tend to get depression and losing my job will make me worse but as he is a locum he has agreed not to give them on condition i see my own GP and he agrees.

    as my name suggests i am a bit mad ( OK a LOT mad) and tend not to be pessimistic so i have that going for me.

    so just one thing to say ..............................................

  • The best yet,,so glad I joined this site you have the best attitude that I have ever known. The song is playing as I type this,,,absolutely BRILLIANT........

    B.

  • Ha ha ,we played this for an old family friend,he,d of loved it :0), and although it seems bad now,just think of spring coming,and the world is your,s to do as you please,no timetables too keep .x

  • one door closes ,another opens

    best wishes O' crazy one

  • problem is some bugger usually slams it in my face !!!! lol

  • have been through similar, but not likely to work again except fighting the atos idiots who say I am fir for work

  • i know i will find work - but the question is what employer, in there right mind, is going to employ someone who will employ someone who will need to have time off sick in the winter.

    sadly, i am a very bad liar!!!! so if asked about illness i will tell the truth and risk rejection rather than lie and say " me! no mate, fit and healthy" lol

    i trying to be filosfical - philosfical - filosophical - logical about this but i think we all know where we sit (only coz we cant stand too long !!) :)

  • Try a new career with a different angle on stand-up comedy perhaps - sat down in a mobility scooter...? Get the pink overall and ginger wig if you want to give that impression, there are not many female comics around and none that I'm aware of that could tackle disability issues from the inside - like taking the P out of Tena products ?

    You're probably right to decline the antidepressants until you've settled down from this setback and seen your regular GP. Once you start...

    Resigning gets you the severance deal and holiday pay, you should still get any holiday pay due if they dismiss you, it's your entitlement. It's more down to how this affects your entitlement to benefits and any exclusions that may apply. The BLF advisor will sort you out on that score.

    Sorry to hear the bad news, as you say, you have to laugh at some of life's little twists.

  • it's a life changing outcome, but look on it as a chance to do the things you want to do and hadn't the time for, gently though, baby steps. I hope things work out for you, it's a crazy Krazy?, world at the moment with lots of people losing their jobs. I am grateful for being a pensioner, and theres not a lot to be said for that. xxx

  • news is good Gordon, because i have resigned for medical reasons i am entitled to all benefits (ESA) for a year.

    BLF where brilliant and gave me great advice - even contacted ACAS on my behalf .

    So if you need benefits advice highly recommend the lovely Carol ( with that fantastic accent) on BLF helpline. She was so good and gave me a lot of hints and tips.

    Have to say though was amazed to find claims can be made by phone/online for these benefits - dont get me wrong, i understand that it is not easy to get to the local DWP office if ill but can understand how so many false claims are made when a JSA claim can be done online!!!!!!

  • Just be aware - my friend has been through this recently and the DWP person told him that he was not entitled to ESA because he had savings. He explained he was claiming based on the NI contributions he had paid but they were adament. It took him 5 MONTHS to get them to agree he was entitled and make back payments.

  • she does stitch - she makes it so easy to understand - as i have said before i am a benefits virgin and don't have a clue what to claim, write, say,do , its a nightmare.

    She put herself out to help me and i was well impressed with her friendly, caring attitude.

    she is highly recommended if you need help with claiming -

    GO CAROL !!!! :) :) :) :)

  • Bugger eh?? If you fancy a beer or two we are going out tonight !

  • If there are jobs advertised, try the Cvil Service or Local Government. It might be on FTC (Fixed Term Contract) terms, but they still have to honour the Civil Service Terms & Conditions.

    Lynne x

  • I am truly sorry that you have lost your job due to poor health, I remember the feeling of anger when I was medically retired at 23, I had so many plans just got married, was going to travel, buy a house have kids. Instead I spent many years going from pillar to post trying to accept who I know was, and what my place in society now consisted of. You know what I now look on my poor health as a blessing, yes I did say that a blessing. Don't get me wrong if it was possible to have perfect health then I would grab it by the horns, but it isn't. Due to my poor health I have got involved with forums that have lead me to get to know people who have encouraged me on to my current path of working towards my degree. I have time to live with a wonderful dog called Lottie, and my previous daxie who taught me so much the about power of rescuing animals in need. I have time to enjoy two lovely lads, who have become my extended family. I can care for myself now properly because I have the time to pace myself, something I couldn't have done if trying to be a Mum, wife and employee.

    I don't believe in God as such, but I do feel that somehow fate plays a role, it is my fate to be who I am and I am embracing it and making the best of it. I only worked for 7 years before poor health got the better of me, so as a young person I felt cheated for so long, those years between then and now were the "Wilderness Years," for me. You have done more than your fair share Krazylady, cut yourself some slack, keep yourself as well as you can this coming winter, and then enter 2013 with a new agenda. Wishing you the best of luck with this latest chapter in your life xxxxxxxxxxxx

    Katina aka Daxiemad

  • What a lovely positive post! I recently had to leave my job and this gives me an entirely new perspective on it. Thank you. xx

  • Oh Krazy.......wot can one say eh? That is pants and I am so sorry, although inevitable like you said.

    But, there is a positive.........you want a seasonal job? Mrs Claus.........an elf...........santas lettle helper.........plenty of opportunity for the right candidate........just don't scare the children rofl!!!!!!

  • Hi,

    I'm sorry that they're putting you through all this. I really sympathise with you as I'm going through the same process myself.

    My big meeting comes on the 25th of this month, If I can't find another job within the company by then, I'll be made redundant.

    Things never look good when you're in a situation like this, it makes me feel like I really don't want to work with people like this anyway, and that maybe losing the job isn't the end of the world like I first thought it was.

    I hope everything works out how you want it .

    Good luck, take care

    Dave xxx

  • Hi krazy,

    I know exactly how you feel I lost my job yesterday too! I 've worked all my life - defined myself by my job. I knew it was coming but it's still a shock. Had a good cry and walked around the shops. I know it was the right decision but it doesn't make it any easier. Going to be positive and look forward now - a whole new start!! ( remind me of this when I need consoling in the week!!) x x

  • So sorry to hear that terri-rose,

    Spent the weekend looking at a blank piece of paper, thinking if i didnt write that letter it would all go away - in the end i did it and his lordship RAN to postbox before i changed my mind.

    Rang this morning to do my ESA claim - was suprised at how easy it was, feel a bit numb still - i am just hoping that in the summer i get this sorted so i can get a seasonal job,

    iI was one of the few lucky ones who enjoyed my job, wages where brilliant and worked with some great people - i will miss them so much.

    truth is i really need the mental stimulation. - might start knitting again and sell on ebay or something but in the end i have always been a survivor so i know i will be OK

    ( already getting pegged for babysitting duties xx lol)

  • Sorry about you losing your job Krazylady, I am sure you will be missed a lot!!! but whatever you do and where ever you go you will find joy and friends a plenty! keep yer chin up! :) xx

  • Ah yes, being told you're ill and you've lost your job isn't fun that's for sure, and yes it does tend to get depressing at times, and I wish you every success in coping with this illness.

    Personally, I find that trying to keep a good sense of humour, no matter what may befall you, does tend to ease the stress; the most comical part is being told by doctors, hospital consultants, etc., is that you've got emphysema and it's degenerative, then you get told by the DWP that you're fit enough to work. Now I just can't figure out who is telling porkies....

    Anyhow, I find that doing a 3-mile jog every dawn opens up the airways and the crowd of people surrounding you when you wake up after being given mouth-to-mouth really does lift the spirits. Oh, okay, I don't jog, I was kidding.

    Righto, once again I wish you all the best for the future, and hope I've managed to brighten your day somewhat. Regards from a fellow sufferer of C.O.P.D.

  • I think a lot of my friends will regret the time on my hands - time to think of wind-ups xx he he !!

    over the years i have put for sale for £50 signs on my friends brand new cars, cold called on the phone ( my dad had emphysema and i rang him to ask if he would be prepared to trial condoms, after a bit he said " look love, i can't breathe so sex is out of the question " so i suggested he used them as jelly moulds!!! - at that point he knew it was me!) nicked the dead flowers out of a friends garden and sent them on valentines day, anonymously of course,! told a store detective my friend was a famous thief - she thought the store detective fancied her coz he followed her round the shop !!! i used to go shopping ( only when my sons where with me ) in my PJs and slippers - yes i am a nightmare !!

    but they do get revenge - my friend did a wanted poster, found the worst picture of me that he could and put that on it, and a few naughty words, then convinced the postman to deliver them to everyone in the neighbourhood, my dad dressed up as a woman and convinced everyone he was my lesbian lover at a party ( people actually believed him!!) and my sons always find ways of trying to embarass me ( rarely works tho!)

    Yes - i think i may have some fun with this spare time i have

    (wink wink)

    HE HE HE HE HE!!!!!!!

  • Hi Krazylady,

    I don't often post on this site, but have logged in whenever i get chance, because the advice

    on here is fantastic, and you have made me smile so many times.

    I am so sorry to hear about you losing your job, and it is exactly what is happening to me.

    I faced disciplinary action in May due to my absenteeism, it was a verbal recorded warning, i have worked for them for 26 years.I now live in dread of being poorly again.

    We have to believe that things happen for a reason, but i am so scared,

    I would appreciate any advice i can get, live on my own, mortgage etc, it's awful.

    But i get the feeling that you will be okay, i hope so x

  • will let you know Fontleroy , like you my biggest worry is the mortgage.

    Have to admit my company never once disciplined me for absenteeism, i was only ever odd once with a COPD non-related illness.

    the truth is now i am not sitting here worrying about losing my job i seem to feel like a weight has been lifted, i know that seems silly but all the will they,wont they doubt was getting to me,

    i would suggest you give the BLF helpline a ring on 03000 030 555 - Carol was brilliant so that really helped ease my mind. might be worth you giving her a ring, she is a mine of information.

    i hope it all goes well for you xx keep ya chin up xxxx

    (((((hugz)))))

  • I had a similar experience and was made redundant last November. I would suggest check the Government redundancy website. It explains what you are entitled to, speak to the Union rep. to see what Civil Service terms are and if you are entitled to a pension. Get in touch with Dept. of works and pensions sooner rather than later so that benefits if entitled can come through without delay. Print out the last three months bank statements, pension papers and savings evidence. All this boring paperwork will help you sail through the forms.

    Last but not least........you will miss the paypacket but it sounds like you will use the extra time to have even more fun than you do now and good luck with whatever you do.

  • Sadly, i was on contract to the government - so i have no recourse with the government,

    i cant complain about the way my company have treated me - i never recieved SSP because for the last 4 months they have continued to pay me full wages ( by mistake ofcourse) but have told me it was their cock up so tough on them !

    i have claimed for ESA straight away, was advised to do so by both BLF and DWP,

    you are right - i will miss my paypacket because i was well paid, i just want to be well enough to enjoy the time off !!!

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