Weekend -Wit .... Something to ponder... - Lung Conditions C...

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Weekend -Wit .... Something to ponder on :D :D :D

Plumbob profile image
20 Replies

Hope your all are doing ok ....Bit of a damp weekend but better than the heat (for me anyway) Anyway here are a few things to contemplate on which hopefully will bring at least a grin to your faces.

Keep sucking it in and smiling :) :)

Plumbob

Only In This Stupid World

......do drugstores make the sick walk All the way to the back of the Store to get their Prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the

Front.

.....do People order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a ‘DIET’ Coke.

....do Banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the Counters.

....do we leave cars worth thousands Of dollars in the driveway and put Our useless junk in the Garage.

....do they have drive-up ATM machines With Braille lettering.

EVER WONDER

Why The sun lightens Our hair, but darkens our Skin?

Why Don't you ever see the Headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why Is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why Is it that Doctors call what they do 'PRACTICE'?

Why Is lemon juice made With artificial flavour, and dishwashing

Liquid made with real lemons?

Why Is the man who Invests all your money called a ‘BROKER’?

Why Is the time of Day with the slowest traffic called ‘RUSH HOUR’?

Why Isn't there Mouse-flavoured cat food?

Why Isn't there Cat flavoured Dog Food?

Why Didn't Noah Swat those two Mosquitoes?

Why Do they sterilize the Needle for lethal Injections?

Why Don't sheep Shrink when it rains?

If Flying is so Safe, why do they call the airport the Terminal?

AND FINALLY ……….

Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam.

Subject: The Advantages of Breast Feeding test

The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk.'

One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages However, he wrote:

1) It is perfect formula for the child.

2) It provides immunity against several diseases.

3) It is always the right temperature.

4) It is inexpensive.

5) It bonds the child to mother, and vice versa.

6) It is always available as needed.

And then the student was stuck. Finally, in desperation, just before the bell rang indicating the end of the test, he wrote:

7) It comes in two attractive containers and it's high

enough off the ground where the cat can't get it.

:D :D :D

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Plumbob profile image
Plumbob
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20 Replies
Magpuss profile image
Magpuss

Cat flavoured dog food? Nooooo, surely not......all v.funny tho'😁😁😁😁😁

Plumbob profile image
Plumbob in reply to Magpuss

Magpuss I'm a big animal lover a have a cat myself -wouldn't hurt a mouse let alone a cat. I contribute to Kays Hill Animal Sanctuary who have a wide range of abused abandoned and neglected animals including Racoons , Chaeck out their facebook page :)

Brilliant, all of them made me think and smile/chuckle 😂😂😂😂 xx Sonia xx

hufferpuffer profile image
hufferpuffer

Love them Plumbob! I'll be pondering all weekend now😁🐒 xxx

aberdeenman profile image
aberdeenman in reply to hufferpuffer

hi huff you don't have time to ponder max needs a long walk lol

hufferpuffer profile image
hufferpuffer in reply to aberdeenman

You wouldn't believe how soaking wet I got walking that hound this morning! 😱 I'm not going again I'm pondering! 😂

aberdeenman profile image
aberdeenman in reply to hufferpuffer

poor max I hope you have a coat for him lol

hufferpuffer profile image
hufferpuffer in reply to aberdeenman

I'm just about to buy him a raincoat!!!pmsl honest!!!!😂

Love the last one. You are so funny plumbob :-)

velvet55 profile image
velvet55

Hee hee

Some good ones there...

I am the person who orders large cheeseburger, large fries and a Diet coke....yumeeeeee 😂😂

xx

Plumbob profile image
Plumbob in reply to velvet55

Only drink diet coke myself don't like the 'Normal' Coke X

onamission profile image
onamission

Love the one about breast feeding have a good weekend plumbob

scorpiolass profile image
scorpiolass

Food for thought here Plumbob & very funny too..it's really good you are back.x

Plumbob profile image
Plumbob in reply to scorpiolass

Like a bad smell scorpiolass .... I just won't go away :P :P :P

casper99 profile image
casper99

Loved the last one Plumbob xx

Seaforth profile image
Seaforth

Cracker keep them coming

Ergendl profile image
Ergendl

Re the last one, a student at my college apparently included the Professor's joke in an exam question answer - and Dad can play with the empties.

Magpuss profile image
Magpuss in reply to Ergendl

😂😂😂

Plumbob profile image
Plumbob

Thank you for your kind comments / likes .... Just noticed my grey prompt words :P don't know why this happens but supposed it's better than last time when I believe I was described as a rectal dysfunction :P LOL X

undine profile image
undine

loved them thank you xx

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