Log in
British Lung Foundation
38,499 members45,404 posts

Here we go again happy as can be.

Another bonus, I woke up which is always good in the morning, overcast but dry so good as I am back down the daughters at 0800 for the builders to carry on in the kitchen as at the moment there is no floor, but they are a really nice couple of men and working well and yes they smile and joke.

I was thinking about when I left the navy and was working with the police I heard this one.

Police officer radioed the station and spoke with the Sgt.

"Sgt we are with a woman who has shot her husband for walking on her wet floor"

Right said the Sgt have you arrested her for the shooting then.

No said the police officer the floor is still wet.

Tommy Cooper went to the doctor and said "People keep taking the Mickey out of me because I think I am a cricket ball.

The doctor said "Howzat" Tommy said "Don't you start".

Our local ice cream man was found dead on the floor of his van covered in hundred and thousands.

Police believe he topped himself.

He went to the butchers the other day and bet the butcher £50 he could not reach the meat on the top shelf. The butcher refused as he thought the steak was to high. (Think about it folks).

Right its 0700 and believe it or not the sun is trying to break though so could be a lovely day so everyone stay happy and smile then the whole world smiles with you, but when your crying it brings on the rain.

Fred xxx ;)

25 Replies
oldestnewest

Morning Fred!

Just this second logged on and up popped your cheery post - lovely way to start the day 😄 Yes, the sun is just starting to show its face here as well. Husband is starting to respond to his new meds so all is well. Enjoy your day at your daughter's and take it easy.

Jan xxx

Reply

Thats good new that hubby is responding to the meds long may it last. I am up and down to the daughters as she had a major leak and new floor having to be laid, but thats not a major problem just awkward. Speak later Jan xxx Fred :)

Reply

Lol...lol...you are such a ray of sunshine Fred, good morning to you. Dry and brightish here, no sunshine yet but you never know. :-) xxx

Reply

Morning my lovely giggler the real ray of sunshine is out here and it brings out the smiles to peoples faces, you look after yourself and keep writing xx ;) Fred

1 like
Reply

Hi Fred, it's steamy and about 27 Celsius here in Sydney, we need a big gust of wind to blow this damp air away. Brilliant jokes as always, had to explain the high meat one to Michael (the husband) give me strength lol! . Have a great day smiling Fred. Love LeeLee. 😃 x

Reply

Hello you my down under friend, oh dear the meat joke was a bit to high brow for Michael, it always loses something when you have to explain it. Keep smiling LeeLee xxx Fred :)

Reply

reading your jokes is a great way to start the day Fred. Take care, have a good day. M x

Reply

Glad it helps Mo, nice to hear from you.Keep that smile going. xx Fred :)

Reply

Morning....your post has certainly made me smile....and the sun is shining, the sky is blue and no clouds, trying to forget it's so cold. Thank you and enjoy your day.

Reply

Morning to you knitter pleased the jokes don't give you the needle, hope the weather haas warmed up for you. Fred x :)

Reply

A much later morning to you Fred. The sun is shining but it,s cold outside. Thanks for the jokes, great way to start the day! Love Margaretx

Reply

Hello there Margaret you must be a nice lady as I am married to a Margaret and have been for 55 years mind you I was away a lot in the navy for 25 years so that might account for something. Keep smiling xxx Fred :)

Reply

morning its a clear sky and sun is trying to get my washing dried know when is spring can get washing out ha ha

Reply

We have to watch out for the seagulls as they tend to dive bomb the washing, hope it stays nice for you with just a slight press to help it along. x Fred :)

Reply

"Good Morning to you Fred...like you we here in the midlands are so far having a nice sunny day......so out and into my garden to try clearing away all the winters gloom....... i cant believe how many leaves i still have left over from Autumn....... all good exercise though sweeping.....I. finished my Steroids Today too........just another two days of my antibiotics and hopefully i will be okay again for a few more days........Hoping you all have a lovely day...You too Fred.......Megan xx..."

Reply

Hi there my lovely friend Megan you take it steady don't go mad in the garden I agree its good exercise but in moderation please, don't your two friends come out and help with the leaves, out Chocolate Lab bitch is helping us she has already started digging the veg plot in the grassed area bless her. I have some more test and blood etc before I go in on the 25th. Steady as she goes please. Love Fred xxx;)

Reply

Good afternoon Fred, hope the job in your daughters is going well, she'll be glad when it's all back to normal I bet! The sunshine is blazing down here, bit chilly still but great :) Going to watch Cheltehham racing! Hugs huff xxxx

Reply

Hi there huff I hope you manage a winner or two, and its not like the joke of where I backed a horse at 20 to one and it came in at 20 past two. Keep smiling speak later. xxx Fred :)

1 like
Reply

Haha Fred, not doing great but all.is not lost!!.....and there's tomorrow...and Thursday...and Friday to go !!! :D

Reply

Best of luck over the next couple of days, I hope you do not get saddled with the losers : ;) Fred xx

Reply

Morning Fred, Keep on waking up in the morning, You sound very cheerful,had to think twice about the butcher joke ! Glad the workman are pleasant, some can be so very grumpy, Have a good day, Best wishes, Bulpit

Reply

Love the jokes Fred, looking forward to reading your posts x Shirley x

Reply

High there Shirley pleased to meet you as such, I like this group such a happy lot, keep smiling. xx Fred :)

Reply

Love ur posts Fred xx they always brighten up my day or night as it's usually night time here by the time I read them :) nonetheless, I love them, u are such a breath of fresh air xx

Reply

Thanks for that kiwichick I try xxx Fred :)

Reply

You may also like...