Advice please

[ValiantLisa]

I'm new poster

My husband suffered heart attack 2 weeks ago, he is 45 years old, he took the dog out for a walk at 5.30pm he returned at 5.45 he stated he felt unwell and had pain in chest, I took him to a and e and by 11.30pm he was undergoing a triple by pass.

He went back into theatre after suffering a bleed, spent 3 days in intensive care followed then by 5 days on the ward.i was advised if surgery not done then he would not be here in 12 hours the way he was going

He was discharged and returns to nurse for dressing change every couple of days,. He has begun his exercise and walks 10 mins every other day.

Advice required 're emotions, I am scared to leave him for more than 10 mins in the day at night I lie awake listening to him breathing, how do you move forward with this fear, please any spouses please share your advice, I know he is the patient and I may sound selfish but realisation now we are home about what we have been through has kicked in. Thanks alot Lisa.

[MichaelJH Heart Star]

Your feelings are not unusual and , indeed, it would be unusual if you did not have these worries. Your first port of call is to talk to your GP and/or ring the BHF nurses after the weekend. They have probably also talkd about cardiac rehab and it may be worth ringing this team, even if it is a bit early, as they will have experience of these worries and may even be able to offer counselling.

[Lezzers]

You've had a big scare & your emotions are all over the place, that's completely understandable. My husband was only 42 when he had a massive heart attack & I helped do CPR on him. For yonks I would get flashbacks & constantly ring him/text him. That was 20 years ago, it does get easier. Give yourself time, get some counselling if you can & definately dont be hard on yourself. I hope your husband continues to improve xx

[marypw]

You are absolutely not being selfish and how you're feeling is normal. You have had a massive shock. My husband had an angiogram and wasn't allowed home, so I wasn't in your position, but he had a triple bypass a week later and has done really well in the 6 months since.

Do go and see your GP and get some counselling, or get some privately if you can - it will really help and I would get it sooner rather than later.

Also do keep talking to your husband about how you both feel - it can actually bring you closer together. But don't do the 'deep and meaningfuls' late at night - that won't help either of you sleep!

Very gradually you change from counting in days after the op, to counting in weeks and then months and by then the anxiety, although not entirely gone will be under control.

Best wishes xx

[Kendal137]

Hi Lisa! Know exactly how you feel as I have been through it too. My husband had a massive heart attack when he was 37 and that was 25 years ago. I couldn't sleep, eat and worried constantly. Gradually things got better. I am now going through the same thing again as his ICD fired in April and it brought it all back to us. All the fear and anxiety came flooding back. He is self employed and can't work as he can't drive so therefore he can't earn which bothers him. We have had some very down days so know just how you feel. But, I think we did it before so we will do it again. He is awaiting a possible op but hope the new medication will work so he doesn't have to. I feel worried too but talking does help. Our husbands are here and I am so grateful for that. Speak to people. His Consultant and Heart Nurses are amazing. My poor sisters get it all too. You are not alone. Just post of here and someone will support you. Lots of love to you and your family. Thinking of you. X

[Hamerka]

Hi Lisa , I’m new on here too , this time last week was just the start of any other normal Tuesday , but in the early hours of Wednesday morning my partner experienced chest pains , he is fit , healthy and goes to the gym every day , we eventually called an ambulance because he was getting very agitated, 2 hours later we were told he was having a heart attack, he’d been admitted and fitted with a stent to his right central artery, we were also told he has severe heart disease to the left side. Numb and shocked doesn’t even come close. We are out of hospital now but having very up and down days , filled with anxiety and worrying about the future , I have struggled as have 3 kids to stay positive for , you feel like you have to be strong for them and your kids but sometimes I just feel completely overwhelmed. I have a good friends support network so am very lucky in that respect , we are going to ring the cardio rehab programme today as we’ve had another rough night and sort of feel we’re not really coping at the minute . But I expect they will say these feelings are entirely normal and only to be expected , I’m jusf feeling exhausted with it all now , I think the thing which is getting me through every day is that you’re not alone , accept help from all angles and accept it’s ok to be worried and upset , coming on here and reading every body else’s stories has given me hope and convinced me this is just part and parcel of recovery ❤️ Xxx

[ValiantLisa]

Thank you.