Best use of Anxiety and Anguish?

[JorgeHuft]

Hi,

This is my first contribution to the forum and I have an important question. Let me explain; I used to cycle to work every day. My daily morning and evening cycle used to take approx 0.5hr each, most of it along cycle/pedestrian paths. I started noticing shortness of breath and went to see the doctor. Diagnose: Severe Aortic Stenosis. Same time; job was terminated due to company’s financial issues. Found a new job which was terminated when I explained my condition, tests and intervention required. Have been waiting for Universal Credit news, info and support for approximately 8 weeks now. Recently completed costly divorce. Due to kindness of landlord I am not living in the streets. Due to my age, I feel I could benefit with re-training, but there are not many options for financing this. Can’t look for a job as there is no date for operation therefore no time frame for recovery. As time pases I feel older, incapable and more and more reduntant. Besides, shortness of breath is getting obvious. Some days it is easy to think Providence will provide: Other days Providence does not exist! How can you use anxiety and anguish to light the future? Any ideas besides Chin Up and all that?

[Kristin1812 Heart Star]

Hi. Only idea I can offer is focus on the small things..... and things you can effect. Sounds pretty simple, I know. But when I’ve been very low, it’s helped. Small steps!

[JorgeHuft in reply to Kristin1812]

Thanks Kirstin. Much appreciated!

Jorge

[Sparklecake]

Hi....did you say your job was terminated because of your condition? I'm pretty sure that's against employment laws. Personally, I would seek further advice! I hope luck turns towards you soon 🙂

[Zena166]

Hi Jorge As sparklecake says there are employment laws So I think you should speak to citizens advice about being discriminated against because of your condition. It’s worth a call at least. Also you mentioned you have universal credit do you have an employment advisor who can give you advice? The following link is to the government website about career and training skills gov.uk/career-skills-and-tr...

You don’t mention your age so don’t want to insult you by suggesting ageUK (sorry! But it’s difficult knowing people s ages!!)

You may want to check out Scope which has some useful information on its website. Not clear where you live but local council may also be able to help. Whilst you are waiting for medical appointments etc it maybe better if you’re signed off sick but it’s better to check that out with one of the experts. Hope this helps. Take care. Zena

[JorgeHuft]

Thanks Zena;

I am much obliged for all your comments and suggestions. Age UK is a good one, I hadn’t thought about it and I am 61.

My work was terminated legally. I was on probation period and they had the right to do it, even so that when we first discussed this they said they were all about for protecting their staff … Ha! But I understand them and I probably would have done the same in their place.

Regarding the Universal Credit system … the only thing I can say from my experience is that it is a cruel system. You never know where you stand, how much you are entitled to, how much you will receive and so on. I was made redundant mid March, it is mid May and I have not had a penny and the first payment will come (if I am lucky) at the start of June … I don’t know how much I will receive and I am sure it will not cover even my rent. I have had to go through the hoops before … it only has turned int a trickier and less effective procedure. The basic moral guidance for Universal Credit is that you are a criminal because you are taking advantage, you do not deserve what you are asking for, that you are presumed guilty of everything bad and you have to prove otherwise before being considered … it is a system based in not trusting, not believing, making things so complex, complicated and cumbersome that most people give up. And Universal Credit is copying the process of a proto-fascist society in which each of us is the police of the other. And the only pragmatic thing is that you come out with a loan to cover their inefficiency and a handful of vauchers for the closest food-bank.

But … this is the way the world is moving. And this is not unique to Britain. Cash is king and money is the only value going.

What I can say to this is that all it has proven to me is that the quality of the British society is superb: its individuals and their values go beyond anything I had ever expected. The friends and friendships (once established) are extraordinary. The solidarity and quality of the help offered goes beyond anything you could have ever imagined. But if you have not been able to form a network of this kind … you will be very lonely and you might feel abandoned.

I have not checked SCOPE but I will. I have received promise for help from various others. Steps2Wellbeing has offered me therapy for mental health, but the waiting list is of approximately 2 months. Steps2Work has offered me help with training and future search for work, but only because I fall into the scope and categories of BAME, age and language discrimination. Their help promises ‘something’ and they have delivered referring me to the mental health charity and some other options like OUTSET who have offered guidance and mentoring for setting myself as Self Employed but … al the options provided require not only commitment but also work that can only be achieved by producing hours and hours of leg-work aimed to tick boxes. This is fine, nobody expects anything for free.

My real worry with all these instances is that they are being funded by the EU and though everybody tells and assures you that nothing is going to happen … well, the movement of staff is noticeable.

In short, thanks Zena, at least your response comes as an antidote to the requests of my ex-wife to pay for insurance and other never before agreed expenses before the Decree nisi gets issued.

In the end I share the idea that Charity is a grey loveless thing and if a rich man wants to help the poor, he should pay his taxes gladly, not doll out money at a whim! … I would add that the government should provide the basic human rights to all members of society without discrimination and manipulation using it all as political capital!

Nevertheless, thanks for all your kind comments and help.

Jorge

[Zena166]

Hi Jorge. I agree with everything you say and hope that you get some resolution soon. Another site that may be of use. disabledgo.com/disabled-cha... it’s a site that lists all charities and I do understand what you are saying about charities but they do have access to an amazing amount of information and resources that you maybe able to tap into. Take care and keep us informed of how you get on. Take care. Zena