Older adult diagnosis

[Amiwrong]

hi. I’m just looking to connect with older adults who have been diagnosed late in life, preferably with level 3 I think it’s called (only because I think experiences would be similar). I am 50yo and I recently received a diagnosis. I’m trying to come to terms with it, but mostly trying to figure out how to unmask I guess. I think I’ve gotten really good at masking over the years and now I have no idea how to be my truly authentic self. That aside, I thought it would be nice to hear other people’s experiences

[OldIndieKid]

Hi. I'm also 50 and currently waiting for an ASD assessment (in the UK it can take up to 3yrs). I've thought a lot about the areas in my life that invole masking. I really can't see a way to unmask in social situations which doesn't involve me just screaming "LEAVE ME ALONE" at 90% of people I have daily interactions with.

Sorry I couldn't come up with something more constructive 🙄

[Amiwrong in reply to OldIndieKid]

lol my gosh, sometimes I wonder if people can tell how much I’m struggling when I interact. At times it can be painful almost lol.

I ended up paying out of pocket to get my assessment, thank you credit.

Why have you decided to look for a diagnosis at this point in your life?

[OldIndieKid in reply to Amiwrong]

I've had bouts of depression and anxiety as long as I can remember. I've always been shy and awkward in social situations. I've tried every therapeutic approach you can think of with little success. I'm looking for clarity as to why I've always been like this and hopefully a diagnosis will help me find a little bit of peace. I know it's to late to make a major difference but I think it will enable me to make small changes to make life more comfortable.

[Amiwrong in reply to OldIndieKid]

this is me in a nutshell ! When we were growing up the label was “shy” and so every quirk was just that. As a teen I was medicated and started therapy for depression. Then at 30 along came anxiety. New therapy twist, everything was focused on the anxiety. At 47 the explanation was ADD. Change of therapy focus yet again. Now at 50 the ASD diagnosis. The ASD diagnosis was a bit of a struggle. Therapy now is back to cptsd focus through the lens of neurodiverse mind I guess, only just recently started. I get hopeful about new perspectives but we shall see. Tell me about your journey.

[OldIndieKid]

My journey basically consist of an incredible ability to mask in social situations, whilst self medicating when alone. Lots of different therapies for depression, anxiety and suicidal ideation.

[Amiwrong in reply to OldIndieKid]

The incredible ability to mask was one of the reasons a diagnosis was so difficult to get. I suppose I made the real me disappear, and spent my life, but mostly childhood, achieving just that. Even in private it was as if I was too scared to be myself.