my asthma on top of everything else is to much to handle =-(

hey. i need some advice on how you all handle you asthma as well as day to day problems. i have so much going on right now and my asthma is what is pushing me over the edge. i have spoken to my GP and my specialist(as i am a chronic/brittle asthmatic) and they havent been very helpful. i don't get much sleep cuz i wheeze all night no matter how many pillows i use and my appetite is getting smaller and smaller. when i was younger i was a self harmer and i dont want to go back down that root. however i can quickly feel myself falling in that black hole again. i have no friends as i am very very shy in person and my family are great but i hate worrying them and now to make things worse i have an ear infection and can not hear properly. i think it would help knowing someone elses coping techniques. thanks for listening x

13 Replies

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  • Asthma can be crappy and sometimes when your being seen by specialists but they have no ideas, it can feel like your going against a brick wall.

    In terms of self-harming please get some help. Where you previously under a mental health team. If not please go and see your GP and get yourself referred. Some GP surgeries know even offer their own counseling service. The quicker you get help the easier it will be. They'll be able to help you come to terms with your asthma and the effect it had on you, and hopefully prevent a relapse.

    Have you looked for any local support groups?

    Annie xxx

  • Sorry to hear you're going through a bad time. I know you don't want to worry your family but sometimes although we feel it may worry them, we have to let them know what is happening.

    Reading your post reminded me of my younger daughter's best friend. I remember she described her asthma as feeling she could breathe in ok but not breathe back out again. She also self-harmed as a teen. I don't know the family well enough to ask if there was any counselling or anything but I do know from my daughter, that she is no longer self-harming.

    As a mum, I say, please talk to your family, let them know exactly how you feel. That sometimes you don't feel the GP and specialist is helpful. Perhaps they could go with you next time. Sometimes its good to have someone by your side.

    The drugs for asthma can have one feeling depressed and isolated even with lots of folk around. I hope you find coming on the asthma forums helps too. Its surely helped me on many occasions. Sometimes, through just reading others posting on a similar thing that I'd wondered and worried about.

    Sending a virtual hug. Feel free to PM me.

    GM :)

  • I would say talk to your family. You may not want to worry them, but I'm sure that they will pick up on your distress and maybe they are waiting for you to say something. My mum died of cancer when she was 81, but when she was alive she didn't tell me if she wasn't doing too well because she didn't want to worry me. I tried to tell her that I worried more because I didn't know what she wasn't telling me and it saddened me to feel that she couldn't tell us how she really was.

    We all have times when things are difficult to cope with and some definitely have drawn the short straw, but othe people do care about you even if they don't fully understand how things are. Have you asked your GP or consultant to refer you to a counsellor?

    Hope you feel a bit better soon

  • First of all you are not alone - i used to self harm and have suffered with eating disorders over the years but i finally got help - you have made a big step by recognising whats happening now you need to reach out for help - it doesnt have to be family there is plenty of support - can u speak to a GP? How did you stop before? Are yoi still at school/college if so is ther a counsellor thre you can talk to.

    Im afraid that many specialists arent that much use once you hit th secre end of the spectrum - could you be referrred to a specialist center like the Brompton or i think Southampton?

    If you are still having sypmtoms at night you are not controlled and your specialist should try and help you!!!!!

    I found that i needed to occupy my hands when i had the urge to harm -i now make cards but used to do x stitch or make jewellry(cant do now due to carpal tunnel)or read or do puzzles either paper or proper ones!!

    Sometimes having a bath or calling a friend or even a help line for an ordinary chat would help.

    Please take that step and get help before you do harm again as once you start its so hard to stop, please feel free to pm me as well anytime.

    Hope the ear clears soon take care xxx

  • thank you

    thank you all for you helpful words. i would go to the doctors but i get to embarressed. i might try and write a ltter and give it to someone. thank you again. x

  • If we all helped in some way, that's good. Why not show someone in the family or a family friend, this thread and the replies we've given you? That should help.

    Please don't sit in silence as I did many a time and let everyone think I was coping when I just wasn't. When I finally found the courage to say how it really was, family were surprised but quickly gave much needed support and continue to do so. Taking that first step isnt easy but the second and third are. Try that first step for me.

    Best wishes

    Moira

  • I find it hard at times ,no support from some family members especialy mother in law.

    she says glad when your allergy test is back so you will be better !sick of hearing you carnt breath well and up AnE and walk in centre. love you to ( NOT)

  • god asthma is a bummer isnt it.....i get by on antidepressants and gin-ok well antidepressants and family and friends but i would like to think the occassional gin helps lol....you have no reason to feel embarrassed about talking to your doctor, he/she will have heard it all anyway. try and keep your mind occupied even if you cant be physically active to try and steer yourself away from negative harmful thoughts. chin up lass sending hugs and positive vibes your way xxx

  • i know how you feel but you should not let things get on top you and do somthing that you find relaxing like listening to music or reading, as couple of months ago i was really struggling with my health as well as everything in life going wrong, as was housebound from march to october and in the last weeks just started going out, as in that time i thought nothing was going to get better and i would have that life for ever, but if you have the right support you can do anything and things get better, if it was not for the support from my support worker and boyfriend i would not have my life back, as now able to get to the shops and doctors etc. dont ever be afarid to ask for the help and support that you think you need. i know it sounds stupid but always take your meds and have them with you and some people to tend to forget them if busy or stressed, i do it. i know how sometime it feels like gp are not being helpful, i had a year of doctors treating my badly and not doing anything, if you feel like you need somthing sorted and your asthma is bad and they dont do anything, just keep making appiontment and being persistant untill they sort it out and eventually they will have to, just keep on thier case and remember they may be doctors but it is your body and you know it better then anyone else as you have to live with asthma everyday they dont.

    and when it comes to juggling your health and everyday life, dont do somthing if you think it is too much or your tired from being ill and you will feel more depressed, i know exaclty how you feel as went through a real dark patch and still find it hard to manage my conditions along with everyday life as i have asthma, eczema, scoliosis, allergies, neuritits, aneamia, ibs along with frequent infections, and still find it hard to manage all my meds and treatments, i just take each day as it comes as it makes life so much easier and more managaable, always think what you are going to do the day ahead and write it down if you feel it would help, never plan too much ahead unless you have to. and never become isolated, always talk to people, hope this helps, and you can always message me

  • I suffer with depression as well as asthma.

    And have recently given up self harm.

    so I guess first thing that i wanted to say was i understand where your coming from and you're not alone.

    ill health is a genuine reason to feel down and as you've had problems before might be worth seeing someone to stop the 'black hole'. Talking about it can be hard though and i can see why you don't want to go to the GP about it but it probably best plan in the long run.

    You mentioned writing. I use this as one of my ways of coping. I write down the bad stuff and stuff that is annnoing me or i cant tell people. If im really annoyed i screw up the paer and throw it at the wall. I also try to write one good thing about every day although that is harder.

    Like the others said if it disturbing you at night your asthma isnt controlled and you deserve extra help. sorry theyhavent been helpful hope you can get them to undestand x

    tired xx

  • I suffer with depression as well as asthma.

    And have recently given up self harm.

    so I guess first thing that i wanted to say was i understand where your coming from and you're not alone.

    ill health is a genuine reason to feel down and as you've had problems before might be worth seeing someone to stop the 'black hole'. Talking about it can be hard though and i can see why you don't want to go to the GP about it but it probably best plan in the long run.

    You mentioned writing. I use this as one of my ways of coping. I write down the bad stuff and stuff that is annnoing me or i cant tell people. If im really annoyed i screw up the paer and throw it at the wall. I also try to write one good thing about every day although that is harder.

    Like the others said if it disturbing you at night your asthma isnt controlled and you deserve extra help. sorry theyhavent been helpful hope you can get them to undestand x

    tired xx

  • Perhaps you tell me how you cope, ive got asthma, diabetes, arthritus and have just been diagnosed with lung cancer on thursday, its small cell carcinoma, so no ops to remove it, just chemo to shrink it for a while so im time limited, like yourself i dont exactly have tons of mates around me , my best friend is my wife, and ive got to be strong for her, im perhaps not so shy though :-) and please dont think im being sarcastic here, just being honest, ive realized that there always someone else worse off than myself, i feel for you but no matter how bad you feel theres always something in this world that makes you smile, it could be a big thing or something so silly , with me its ""rocky"" the robin who i feed every day, hes or her is a cheeky little fella, but puts a smile on my face, of course theres the wife total ability to look on the positive side of life always find some reason to dismiss the worse, shes mad :-)Look for something positive in yer day , dont look at the negatives , youll find to many of them, but remember those around you suffer your pain as well , so be strong for them, we tend to moan about ourselves to much and forget those who are in just as much mental pain as us, the more positive we are the better it is for them.No self harm on this forum please, we fight here :-) Gaz

  • Firstly I would like to say that that you have made a big step in admitting the problem that might happen. We all suffer from difficult times but because we are at the end of the spectrum of asthma patients we also have to deal with that too. One thing that keeps me going (as morbid as it sounds) is the thing I finally realised last year that everyone's life is a bit rubbish but most people don't speak about it. So we aren't alone.

    If you think you can't speak to your doctor, why not try speaking to Breathing space (0800 83 85 87)? They have trained counsellors on the telephone and it is totally confidential.

    Keep your chin up and try and find something good in your day each day. That's what I do. Today- finding seeds for 20p online lol

    Glynis- Don't worry, my nurses didn't really pay much attention to me till my allergy results came back..... sometimes it just takes some time for them to understand what they are dealing with.

    Keep on keeping on

    x

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