Not sure what to do

Hi, im just recovering from another sudden Brittle Asthma attack and really dont know what to do for the best ref my daughter, although shes now 13 and knows everything about my condition inside out she goes into complete shutdown when a sudden attack happens, she was with me when it happened last week and could not tell the ambulance anything or couldnt even give me the adrenaline, as she just freezes with fear which makes it harder for me, and afterwards she is so sorry and I dont blame her in the least but just need to find a way to get her to cope better when it happens... does anyone have any suggestions? We have tried talking about it, watching videos on it etc and thats how she knows so much but if shes alone with me and the only person I can rely on then im stuck with just alerting my husband with the panic system but hes not there to help me with everything else.

We always thought this was something that would improve as she got older but it has not seemed to.

Thanks

Snowy

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Sounds like you are having a bad time. I also have brittle asthma but am a teacher in a secondary school so will try to offer some advice regarding the teenage side of things!

Perhaps your daughter is worried that, with all the knowledge she has, she is expected to help more than you actually need her too. What about writing everything down in an emergency protocol with next of kin, medicines, address, GP number, consultant, which medications help best in an emergency etc. This way she knows that everything is on the paper and the emphasis is not just on her being responsible for telling people important information at a time when she is probably terrified. If you take some of the responsibility off her, then she might actually cope better. Also, try to reinforce that you will not blame her if something goes wrong or if she fails to respond in time or make the correct decision. it is alot for a teenager to cope with and she might be really scared of what would happen if she made a mistake. As for her freezing and not being able to use the EpiPen, I guess just reinforcing to her that it is important for her to give the EpiPen but that she won't be held responsible or blamed if she fails to act or if she does something wrong. It might work. Quite often, if the pressure is taken off teenagers, they start to react more positively and not worry so much about their actions. She may well be terrified that if something really bad were to happen, it would all be her fault because she did or didnt act appropriately in an emergency.

Try to spek to her about this. It's not easy talking to many teenagers about difficult things like this, but there may well be an underlying fear behind her not coping. Hope this helps a bit.