If the wife goes out and leaves me a job to do ( empty the dishwasher ) and it's not done,how is that my fault ? Don't you girls realise,I can't put my feet up,watch the footy AND do the dishwasher ! Blimey, next thing you know I'll be expected to do other things 
Not my fault: If the wife goes out and... - Lung Conditions C...
Not my fault
58 Replies
•
Oh, Jambo, my heart goes out to your good lady. Goodness, all she asked you to do was empty the dishwasher, not wash them too! You've got it too easy, lad!
Yer you'll have Ti get yer own beer, mow the lawn, cut the hedge, and God forbid hoover and polish, cant be avin that pal, you stick yer feet up and watch telly, there's other dishes in't cupboard. 
• in reply toazaard
Oh, Azaard, don't encourage him ! Have a thought for his good lady, now!
• in reply to
Now now.... At the moment you are outnumbered,We are the boss.
• in reply to
In your dreams!!!!!
ann1webb• in reply to
us girls will never be outnumbered we only let you think you are the bosses
azaard• in reply to
Dishwashers are a pain in the butt, unless you got family like the Walton's round, but even then, If you wash up as you go you get this problem, plus the running costs are ridiculous.
• in reply toazaard
Oh, Azaard you really should check your facts. Us gals know all the answers when it comes to dishwashers - fully filled with crockery, it costs less to run, and you use less water too! And as an added bonus, our lovely soft hands, stay lovely and soft ....
What difference does it make if the Waltons are round, my mum and dad only had three children, although my brother's name was John. Anyway Azaard we never came further north than Birmingham Keep smiling.
Carole x
I know... But she even wants me to turn it on !!! Trouble is I can't reach it from the other room
• in reply to
There's laziness ..... and then there is laziness personified .... wonder what category your good lady puts you in .... ????
• in reply to
I can't answer that !!! An opinion aswell,nah..
• in reply to
Sorry for overtaxing you. All this mental exercise must be very tiring
• in reply to
Zzzzzzzzz
• in reply to
ROFLOL .....
You'll soon wake up when she gets home!!!! I think we'll all hear her roaring at you
• in reply to
You know her then ? I'm just a chicken really,she said she be back around 5..... I'll do it at 5 to
• in reply to
I used to have one just like you ..... be scared, is all I'm saying! LOL
• in reply to
Oh I am,we are all the same us blokes,wife goes out,leaves jobs to be done,we do em 10 minutes before you get in.then tell you how busy we have been since you went out!!!! Shit......gotta go empty the dishwasher
• in reply to
.... oh, dear me, and to think you thought we didn't know this....... how sad .....
• in reply to
All done and emptied,haven't I been the good hubby,mind you,I'm knackered now and do need a sit down 
• in reply to
Oh, bless your cotton socks.... you have a wee rest now.... She'll soon be in to cook your dinner
• in reply to
Ahh,surprised you there,chicken in the oven cooking,Salad is ready,( she did that before she went to her friends ) ......all that's missing is the wife.said she would be back at 5 !!!
• in reply to
See, there's no bounds to that woman's consideration - giving you enough time to catch your breath before she arrives home
Your poor good wife. Please tell her she has my deepest sympathies.Has she thought of getting help? then if you have to pay for it , you might find it easier to do the jobs yourself , maybe just a thought .Hee hee Julie
She gets all the help she needs,sometimes I fill the mop bucket up for her.See,I'm a kind and considerate kind a guy x
Daxiemad• in reply to
God if I was your wife and read this comment, I would go and fill it up right now (bucket that is) and tip it over your head, oh and I would stick the mop somewhere unmentionable 
• in reply toDaxiemad
And I would love to be a fly on the wall at the A & E when you explained exactly how THAT happened to the nurses
• in reply toDaxiemad
Ouch,made my eyes water just thinking about that one
Plus wife hss final revenge. Goes to stay at friends for couple days. You have to do it all!
• in reply to
And the wife going away for a few days is punishment ????? Yippee, I don't have to watch 30 year old poirot,and even older miss Marple.
• in reply to
Your good lady controls the remote?????
RESPECT to that woman!!!!!
• in reply to
Don't you all ??
Daxiemad• in reply to
No we don't!
• in reply to
NOooooooooooooooo for years there was nothing else on tv but sport, more sport and yet more sport.....
Times have now changed x x x
• in reply to
I must be doing something wrong then.last time I had it was when she said 'can you put new batteries in the remote '
• in reply to
Nope .... wasn't allow that privilege either .... perhaps he knew once I'd found out there were other channels available, I'd get off the computer and start watching the box
• in reply to
Crikey,it's just me... Going to put my foot down when she gets home !! And tell her ! If it's ok with you,and of course if your not watching anything,and if it's not too much trouble........ Put Tom n Jerry on ?? There,that told her
I cant have a dishwasher for the sake of 1cm in my kitchen. Impossible but somehow I have survived - JUST.
My husband is the dishwasher regularly, and there is only room on my kitchen for a human dishwasher. Mind you Lottie would like to help sometimes, if there was something tasty on the dishes lol.
How do you keep the wife in the kitchen? Shorten her chain. lol The old ones are the best ones.
Bobby
• in reply tophillips1
Now Bobby,after your comment on exblondes blog earlier getting you all them brownie points,you've just undone all that hard work ! These girls are gonna hang you out for that one. And I was hoping you could be my mentor !!!! But I can drop myself quite easily thankyou lol
They are the best but I was told off by the moderator for posting 'wife'jokes because there had been complaints .Your joke was the last one that I posted about wives
Richard
I will get ready to fight off the moderators then Richard. That joke has been going the rounds for over 60 years and must carry grandfather rights by now
Bobby
I put many wife jokes on before I was asked to refrain as I have also been asked with other types of jokes.As you know my jokes are clean and innoffensive ,without bad language.But there will always be someone who will moan.
I have never seen one of yours that I was unhappy with Richard. They are just sad people.
Bobby
• in reply toKingoftheCocktails
I like wife jokes gives us poor underdogs chance to retaliate....
These sad PC people are ruining this country. In a way I am glad I don't have too many years left.
Bobby
Hi guys.like you say,wife jokes been around for ever and a day.if people don't like them,don't read them.simple.only been here a few months,but I have noticed you 2 guys put a lot of smiles on people's faces.mostly the ladies,admittedly.so you doing ok in my book.
Keep it up
wellman2• in reply to
Must agree with you, Wife jokes are traditional like mother in law jokes aren t they it s only if there s bad language involved it becomes offensive, and I ve not seen anything like that carry on with the jokes I say it brightens up the day.
In your own words king - put yourself in someone elses shoes.....
You just keep thinking you're the boss Jambo. Deluded or what?!
Lovely post and made me smile. xxxxxxxxxxxx
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