I only have mild asthma, but I am INCREDIBLY embarrassed about it, to the point where I literally can't take my inhaler in front of people, including my family. When I need my inhaler at school, I'll either sit it out or ask to go to the loos and I know that I really really shouldn't do that but I don't know what else to do! During lockdown I've been thinking a lot about this as I'm about to start 6th form, and I've been reading through some posts on this forum from ages ago but haven't really been able to find any advice on this.
I was wondering what people do/did when they were at school or sixth form.. would you just take your inhaler in class and then wish the floor would swallow you up when 30 pairs of eyes whip round to stare at you? Or would you have an arrangement with the teacher? No-ones ever even been mean to me about asthma or anything but I'm just so embarrassed because it makes me feel weak and I'm worried people will judge me. Has anyone got any advice on how to get over this/how I should try and deal with my asthma at school? I'd be so grateful if anyone has any advice x
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mmry
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First off it’s important to remember that having asthma doesn’t make you weak any more than having diabetes does. If anything it makes you strong, as you live a life with one of your major organs not functioning correctly! Whilst I was at school, I was national level in 3 sports (tumbling gymnastics, trampoline and karate) I just needed the inhaler to get me at my best.
The way I introduced my asthma to my friends was just blurting it out and showing my inhaler... their response... ‘oh. Can I try I puff? Please? I heard it can make you hyper’ 😅😂. They were more upset that I wouldn’t let them all ‘have a go’ than they were concerned about me having asthma, and once I had them ‘on my side’ it was less scary cause I knew they understood and wouldn’t ditch me etc.
It’s always embarrassing the first few times that you use your inhaler in front of people (esp friends) but then you realise that usually no one is watching and if they are they really don’t care about it. Double check the policy for inhalers at your school (as each school/college is different) but if you’re going in to sixth form usually they’re happy for you to have control and more independence if you need to use it. The few times I used it in class I just whipped it out and did it then and there, and I think at most the friend next to me asked if I was ok, and a teacher would occasionally check I was ok once the lecture part finished (I never needed any more than that otherwise if I had been really struggling I’m guessing they’d’ve stopped class to check 🤷♀️😅). If you think it would help try taking your inhalers in public places where you don’t know anyone etc (buses etc) if it’s the social anxiety among peers that is worse than just taking it in public. And try taking it in front of your family... it’s usually awkward initially but that wears off the more normal it is to them (try it with your preventer if you don’t need your reliever so you and they can get used to the situation)
But I can honestly say that as an adult the only time’s I’ve been looked at is to ask if I’m ok or to double check my nebuliser is a nebuliser and not a vape 😅😂😂. And as a bullied kid in school they never went after my asthma as the thing to make fun of.
But seriously I’ve now taken it in multiple places (work, uni, school, trains, buses, middle of the street to name but a few... 😂)and no one really has cared/looked. The only time I haven’t been ignored was when coaching a group of kids (aged 6-8 from memory) who Ofc then wanted to know ALL about my inhaler what it was for and how it worked 😂😂.
It’s always scary the first time, esp among your peers when your weary of their reaction but I’d put money on them either being concerned for you, not caring or not even noticing 😅. If one positive thing has come from the current situation people are more aware of how serious asthma can be. If it helps to bring up your bravery levels when in public remember; if you’re in a group there is probably at least one person trying to either hold in a fart or get away with picking their nose and being noticed using your inhaler is a lot less embarrassing than either of those!😉
Hope this helps and good luck. As always if you need more than 3 doses of reliever a week you should see your doc, and hopefully you also have an action plan in place. Equally The AUK helpline nurses are great and can be reached on 0300 2225800 M-F 9-5, Alternatively their WhatsApp service is 07378 606728 if you want to talk directly to someone to discuss it!
Hi Mmry. Are you newly diagnosed? I remember school days with asthma in the 80’s and 90’s. The first thing that struck me about your post was that you are worried about your class mates judging you.
Maybe they are, but you never know HOW they are judging you. They could be admiring your strength and courage in the face of a chronic condition or/ and showing concern for your welfare. We all naturally have our insecurities and sometimes assume the worse but that isn’t always the case.
Remember asthma doesn’t make you weak. In fact it is the complete opposite. Anyone with a chronic condition, what ever it may be has more strength than they can possibly know. If you think about it you have to go through all the stresses and strains of life that every one else does plus you have to do it with a chronic condition.
Your inner strength often shines through and the people around you will see it, even if you can’t see it yourself.
I think you were really asking for a practical guide but I wanted to give you some words of encouragement.
Thank you so so much honestly your words are really inspiring! I started getting symptoms since year 4 but was only diagnosed about 2 years ago so yeah I'm not like new new but still trying to get to grips with things! Thank you so much for your advice!!
So you are still getting things sorted in your mind then🙂. I’ve lived with asthma all my life and I’m still learning after 30 plus years. Although I never had a “lesson” about what the condition was, how to control it, signs of an asthma attack etc. I think it was assumed that because I grew up with the condition I knew all about it. For me it was “if your wheezing, take your blue inhaler” that was all I had to go on. Sometimes the dr would ask me to blow into a tube with a scale on the side why? I had no idea. I know now it is a lot more complicated than that and times have moved on from the old school thinking that if you are asthmatic you will expect to wheeze most of the time.
I had difficult to control asthma as child which became milder during my teens and 20’s only to start to increase in intensity again mid way through my 30’s. (last year was just awful)
I have another chronic condition which took me 16 years to come to terms with and find a way to live with it. Often the mental challenge is just as difficult as the physical one.
Just remember if you need your reliever inhaler, take it. Never mind who is around or what they might think. Your life is much much more important.
Could you let your teachers know you might need to leave to take your inhaler so you can just get up and take it outside the room? It might also help to think about different types of inhaler. My son’s consultant has just prescribed him a powder reliever which is a bit more discreet to take. Apparently the main reason people have poorly managed asthma in their teens is due to embarrassment over taking meds so your not alone! In my experience (I’m a teacher) you might get a couple of looks the first time round but people will soon lose interest.
Wow your embarrassed to take your inhaler. Be proud , be very proud you are dealing with a serious condition yet still living a normal life. Well done and good luck
Oh how I identify with this one! I used to take it as the cistern flushed to hide the sound. All the advice here is very wise and teachers today should be much more clued up about asthma, so people are more understanding. Moreover, you have more time free in the 6th form. However, I think it might be a bit deeper than this: if your asthma is well controlled you shouldn't need to take yourblue inhaler much at all. If you do find you keep needing it at school, have a talk with your asthma nurse or GP. If anyone does ask you about it, you could tell them it's viagra...
Oddly enough, I was kinda embarrassed when I first started using my inhaler, and I was 20 at the time. Then I just thought to flip* with them, I need this. Now I just take it out and use it. Nobody bothers, every so often someone will ask about it, which gives me an excuse to explain and sometimes educate someone. You'd be surprised at the amount of folk who don't realise what asthma is.
Good luck, but try not to bother (it may take about 6 times).
Hello! I totally understand what you are going through. I am the same way, and I am an adult. I work at a hospital, and I still don’t want to take my medication in front of anyone. But that is normal. I have co workers who are diabetic, and they will go off somewhere to take their blood sugar readings, away from everyone else. There is nothing wrong with feeling embarrassed. It is totally natural. What I would do, is speak to your teacher one on one. Tell them sometimes you need to take this medication, and you need to be excused to do so. You don’t have to go hide to take it. Even just stepping out in the hallway is fine. If you are not comfortable with that, you can go somewhere more private. The most important thing though is that you do take the medication so that things don’t escalate further. There is nothing weak about having asthma. It is not your fault your lungs are having a bit of a rough time. Take care of yourself and have a good school year!
I was 14 when I first had asthma symptoms. At first I used to leave a room even, when I was working when I was older. I used to feel embarrassed taking it in front of people. However, after several bad attacks I decided I no longer cared what anyone else thought. I felt my life was more important to me than other people. Be proud of yourself. Stand up for you! You are brave and stop caring about others. You will leave school and never see them again!
I am the same way! I only used it once in front of somebody and with my back turned. I feel like I wouldn’t inhale it correctly if I’m in public cause I’d be too distracted and awkward lol. Even at work in my closed office I make sure no one is in the hallway to see me use it through the glass panel. I think I don’t want to look like someone that needs to be helped. It’s funny but I get the same awkward feeling when others come help me pick up the things I drop on the floor at the grocery store when I decide to go in without a cart and then take too many things in my arms! I never got a broken bone but I always thought I would especially hate going in public with crutches or an arm in a cast cause people would try to help me and I wouldn’t like the attention!
I only started using inhalers and injecting insulin when I was older, but in my teens I was extremely body conscious - I’d wait forever for a free cubicle at the swimming pool rather than change in the open. Then I went to an international youth festival with open showers. The German girls clearly didn’t care who saw what - and no one looked. The Brits were all embarrassed, contorting themselves to hide as much as possible, and I realised it’s the embarrassment that draws the eye. So, I decided the only way forward was to pretend I didn’t care - and if you pretend for long enough, it becomes real.
It was hard at first, but it worked - not only can I now change where other people can see me (if they bother to look, and they don’t), it helped me when I had to start using an inhaler and later injecting myself. I felt awkward, of course I did, but pretended until there wasn’t a problem - it took your post to remind me how things used to be.
Good luck with the sixth form - and I’m sure you’ll cope with the inhaler. If you need it, use it!
You've received so many good suggestions here. I hope you feel the support from those of us who've "been there, done that.' Might I suggest -- practice in private. Practice removing the inhaler from your pocket or purse or bag, shaking it, popping the cap... then continue with (pretend) inhaling, holding it in while replacing the cap and putting it away (or just holding it a bit before a second inhalation). The key is to not make it a noisy, interruptive, arm-waving production but instead, be nonchalant about it, as if it's the most ordinary task in the world. Think about how easily we grab our cells and check for texts -- right in front of others; how easily we whip out a credit card to pay for a purchase -- in front of others; or how easily someone will just yank out a tissue and blow his/her nose for the world to see. Oh, you may get a couple looks, but really that's just others being human, acknowledging something new and different. You may also get the chance to educate friends and maybe a stranger or two about the life-saving qualities of modern asthma treatment. I promise, if you act as if it's normal (and it is!), likewise will others. Best to you!
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